Have a Litte Faith in Me
by angel422
Summary: What happens when Jude's life suddenly becomes full of moments that tests her faith in the people she loves. Funny& Moving. PLEASE R&R.
1. Chapter 1

**Author's note: Hey everyone! I hope that you return to me for my newest attempt at a fan fic. This one begins right after the episode problem child, and I have a ton of things planned for this fic—it'll be a whirlwind of adventure, emotional turmoil, and surprising turn of events. I just hope you guys like where I take it. The first chapter is a little short, but I wanted a good lead up into the story. Once again, I try my best to post several times a day. Please Please Please R&R.

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BAM! Eyes fly open, body propels itself into an upright position, nerves bunch up, shivers navigate the spine, legs tremble, the mouth presses itself into a narrow, pinched line, and suddenly the whole frame of the body collapses into a sitting position that trembles with a newfound clarity. Some would call that reaction 'the light bulb coming on in the head,' but I call it realization.

Life is so often like a book with characters being moved like pawns through different aspects of reality. Then there comes that one event in life, whether happy or sad, that causes people to look back on their lives. It's like watching a movie being played in your head with one frame dissolving into another. You relive and experience the drama, the mystery, the romance, the laughter, the horror, and the triumphant moments that life can bring us. And before long, those memories become like faithful reruns of your favorite television show—something you can recall any time you want. But what happens when the fantasy is broken into pieces by intruding reality—cruel, cold reality.

And sometimes reality can be as simple as a For Sale sign sitting in front of a home you had grown up in since birth—the kind of reality I found myself staring at in present silence as a cold weight settled depressingly in the pit of my stomach.

A grunt from beside me alerted me to the fact that Sadie was still trying to process the information as I slowly walked into the yard and circled the 12 by 9 inch piece of cardboard as if walking around it enough would make the damn thing disappear.

"Is this some kind of sick joke?" Sadie asked in a low tone as I glanced up at her with a quirked brow and a small twitch of my lips.

"Joke would be a bad description here, Sades. Do you see me laughing?" I said with candor as Sadie stared at me crossly before turning to run toward the house. Mom's car wasn't in the driveway. What did she think she could do—talk to the walls and hope they could give her some answers? Hmmm…psychic drywall—not a bad idea. Just when things seemed to be turning around, the world **_just_** **_has_** to throw another wrench into the mix.

Wearily, my eyes followed her progress a moment before turning back, once again, to look at the sign in disbelief. Oh, this couldn't be good. Confusion wracked my brain as I tried to recall anything in mom's demeanor over the past couple of weeks that would have clued us in to this moment, but nothing was coming to me. As a matter of fact, we hadn't talked to mom much lately, and now I was starting to regret that fact immensely. Why is it that every time I feel like I am getting a handle on my life, the freakin' door knob falls off in my hand. Kicking at the sign with my foot, I watched it swing back and forth almost hypnotically as someone yelled loudly from behind me, and I spinned around to find Jamie smiling from across the street.

"Don't tell me, you've decided to master the art of the all mighty ancient gods of kaahhraahhtee!" He shouted with a laugh as he did a fake wood chop with his hand in the air. I just stared at him hollowly, and I saw the moment he noticed I wasn't impressed because his face fell in an expression of concern. Jogging over across our lawns, he quirked a brow as he pulled on an old Interpol pull-over to keep out the morning chill.

"What's up, Jude?" He asked breathlessly as he approached. I didn't say anything. I just moved aside so that he could see the sign from where he stood. Looking from the notice back to me, I knew when it clicked in his brain.

"Shit!" He murmured as he ran his fingers through his already unruly hair.

"Shit is right." Sadie stated wearily as she stomped down the front stairs while waving a white piece of paper back and forth in front of our faces.

"She's gone, Jude. And I think we've just walked straight into hell." Sadie said with a frown as I grabbed the missive from her, reading it slowly as Jamie perused it from over my shoulder. No, it couldn't be. Looking back up at Sadie, I felt my face flush in disbelief and anger.

"Then we better start finding a way to douse the flames, because it's only going to get hotter down here." I mumbled as Jamie stood between us, placing an arm around each of our shoulders before squeezing reassuringly. I suddenly felt raw and exposed for today had transpired from such a simple morning to more like an epic event that, like a volcano, erupts suddenly with such power spreading and consuming before hardening into a rock that remains forever to remind others of the event long after it transpired.


	2. Chapter 2

I felt sick as my fingers crashed around the paper, crushing until, in my mind's eye, I could see it disintegrating into a million little pieces. Somewhere in between cursing fate and life altogether, I felt Sadie pry the note gingerly out of my grasp before leading me back over to the car with her hand pressing gently on the small of my back. Something told me just from her calm exterior that she was more aware of the situation transpiring around us than I was because, somewhere between my birthday and damage control, I had somehow missed out on the whole parental upheaval.

"Maybe we should go back to the studio for a little while." She said quietly as Jamie nodded while I just stared at Sadie silently, assessing her wrinkled brow as she climbed into the car. I still didn't say anything; I just nodded. Jamie tapped the palm of his hand on the hood of the car a few times to get Sadie's attention before motioning toward his house.

"Give me a sec, will ya? And I'll catch a lift." Jamie said before throwing a worried look in my direction. I think he was just waiting for me to explode. Couldn't fault him there. I **_was_** beginning to feel eerily like Mt. St. Helen's.

"That's not a bad idea." Sadie mouthed silently to Jamie as we both watched him run across the street to disappear into his front door before resurfacing five minutes later with a bag slung over his shoulder and a pair of keys in his hand. It was kind of unrealistic really—almost as if everything were moving in slow motion as Jamie trotted back to us and entered the vehicle. I heard but didn't really interpret the car moving as Sadie weaved through traffic toward the studio. We pulled up to my home away from home in record time, and Sadie switched off the ignition before settling back in her seat, resting her head against the headrest and staring numbly out the front window. I peered at her curiously.

"You know something else, don't you?" I asked warily as Jamie suddenly pushed on the back of the seat making us aware of his presence. I didn't even glance at him, although when he cleared his throat for the third time, I knew he felt mildly uncomfortable.

"I think I'm just going to go in now, you guys. Thanks for the ride. I drove with Patsy yesterday and left my wheels here at the studio so I shouldn't need the favor repeated later today." He said softly before opening the door and glancing once more at me before beating a quick retreat. Sadie and I never even blinked as we continued to stare at each other until finally the tension must have been too much for her because she sighed heavily before laying her forehead on the steering wheel. Right now, I had no sympathy.

"I knew mom was having financial problems, Jude…." Sadie began as I threw my hands up into the air in exasperation before interrupting her rudely.

"Financial problems? Okay….uhhhh, Let's just try this for a reality check. She cleared out my entire banking account, Sadie. After I trusted her with it!" I yelled loudly before pushing open the car door, stumbling out onto the pavement, and slamming it forcefully behind me prior to leaning against the side of the car with my arms crossed against my chest huffily. Vaguely, I could hear Sadie exiting the car behind me as I fumed about the whole situation. '_Just breath, Jude_,' I kept telling myself incessantly as the side door to the studio opened to reveal the rather delectable visages of Tom Quincy, Vincent Spiederman, and my all time favorite engineer, Kwest. Too bad I didn't have it in me to feel happy about it.

"Jude, mom didn't clear out your banking account." Sadie said quietly as I stared at Tommy a moment (almost as if seeing him would calm me down) until what Sadie said suddenly invaded my brain enough that I turned to stare at her in shocked suspicion.

"Then who did, Sadie?" I asked slowly, almost afraid of what the answer was going to be. Sadie's cheeks flushed as she kicked at a rock with the heel of her high heel pumps.

"I did, Jude." Sadie said shortly as Tommy and Kwest stopped in surprise only a few feet away from me while I felt my jaw drop literally to my feet before hearing the faint sound of my purse hitting the pavement with a crash. 'whoosh' I literally felt as if I had been sucker punched directly in the gut. What was this—shock the hell out of Jude Harrison week?

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_**A couple of minutes earlier….**_

Jamie walked resolutely into the studio with a sour look etched across his face as he made his way slowly to a couch positioned against the wall. Taking a seat, he waited for Patsy while easing back in an 'I've got something on my mind' position while mumbling something senseless to himself.

"Going off the deep end, Andrews?" A voice asked suddenly from beside him as Jamie lurched in surprise before glancing over to see Spiederman reclined casually along the arm of the sofa. Jamie shrugged.

"Maybe you should go talk to your girlfriend, Spied." Jamie said quietly as he looked pointedly at the side door he had just entered from. Walking by them at that exact moment, Tommy and Kwest stopped in sudden curiosity at Jamie's tone.

What's wrong with Jude, Andrews?" Tommy asked in instant concern while Spied threw him an 'It's none of your damn business' look before straightening up on the defensive. Jamie looked around uncertainly before sighing in defeat.

"It's really not my place to tell, but I will say this for sure—fireworks are just about to explode in the parking lot of G Majors. And if you're planning on going out there, make sure you take a hard hat." Jamie said cryptically as the guys looked only briefly at Jamie before turning on their heels and heading for the door. Pushing the door open, the group managed to make it half way over to Sadie and Jude when a bomb the size of the one that destroyed Hiroshima suddenly fell.

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**_Author's footnote: Hey guys! I hope you are checking in. Looking for a lot of reviews on this one._** **_Okay, I was going to give you guys some hints about what's going to happen but I am afraid it will ruin the suspense. Ican prmisethat you will be tickled pink one minute and pulling your hair out the next.Please stick with me, I promise you will be shocked again and again._** **_Please R&R guys. Counting on you. Smiles._ **


	3. Chapter 3

**Author's Note: Just going to take a moment to thank you all for the start out reviews. If they keep coming like that, then I can promise you great things for this fic. Just thought of a really great idea for later in the story. It will shock the hell out of everyone, but I won't give it away. Anyway, I forgot my disclaimer when I started this fic so here goes: I do not own Instant Star or any of the characters or storylines mentioned in the show. I do, however, own all the lyrics in my fics and any new characters that arise. Smiles to you all. Lots of laughter. Please Please Please keep R&Ring.

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Have you ever had one of those moments where your whole body just feels like it is on fire, and nothing you can do can seem to ease the burn? Well, let's just say, at this moment, I was **_way_** beyond that point.

"What the hell, Sadie?" I asked angrily stomping around the car to stand directly in front of her. Sadie just looked at me with a defeated expression on her face, and despite my attempt at feeling nothing, I felt her pain ease itself into my soul, extinguishing any anger. The yells I had felt so strongly course through my system before only managed to come out in a whisper.

"Why?" I managed to squeak out around the lump that sat rigidly in the middle of my throat. Sadie just shrugged.

"Because you had plenty of it, Jude, and once I discovered that dad signed all of your checks with S. Harrison, it didn't take me long to realize that I could do it too. I didn't mean for it to go as far as it did, Jude." Sadie said with a quivering voice before grasping me by the shoulder and shaking me lightly. "I just wanted what you have, Jude—a chance. You had a contest that handed you a contract, Jude. I have to finance my way. I just…I just let it go too far." Sadie finished measuringly as I stared at her dumbfounded. It's not as if I could argue with her. In a way, I even agreed. It's just that I was too keyed up to process well…anything right now.

"Why didn't you just ask, Sadie?" I said softly, trying to control the flames that were licking at my intestines. Sadie shrugged.

"I should have." She answered softly as we just looked at each other while both of us came to a startling conclusion without even speaking it out loud. I just nodded as if saying '_I don't care what you did right now, let's just figure out what to do about mom_.' Sadie nodded back as if answering _'then let's let it go_.' It wasn't as if my royalties wouldn't begin to accumulate again. Money was the least of our concerns right now. I could hear rustling from behind us and I turned to see Spied looking at Tom and Kwest in bafflement.

"Okay. All the nodding—that was some kind of strange girl speak right?" He asked sardonically as Tommy shook his head slowly.

"Don't Spied. It's like being asked to buy feminine hygiene products for your girlfriend. You just don't want to go there." Tom said with a quirk of a brow as Kwest nodded in agreement. I just rolled my eyes at them and pushed my way into the studio. I knew they just wanted to lighten the mood, but they had no idea how far the seriousness of the situation actually went. I could feel a hand grab at my elbow as I walked past, and I stopped suddenly to stare up into Tom Quincy's eyes.

"Jude?" He asked without even framing an entire question. I just kept staring at him without saying a word as Sadie suddenly appeared at his shoulder.

"Mom left, Tom. She packed and left the house to go marry Don in Las Vegas, Nevada. She has a few debts that we have incurred—part of it my fault of course—and she decided to put our house on the market to pay it off. There it is. The long and the short version of it." Sadie said wearily from beside Tom as Spied took my hand in his, throwing Tom a look before leading me into the studio. Right now, Sadie and I just had a lot of processing to do, and we didn't exactly feel the desperate need to go home. Tom and the rest of the gang just grew really quiet. I knew what they were thinking—wow!—because I thought the same thing at first. I suddenly felt the need to write a song, to record, or anything for that matter except for sitting out here thinking about things we couldn't fix right now. So I did the sensible thing—I stomped into studio 1 and grabbed a guitar with Tom Quincy following closely behind me. Spied tried to tag along, but I saw Kwest grab him by the arm before leaning over slightly.

"Let them go make music. This is when they do it best together, Spied—when Jude's upset. He brings out the best from her when she's angry." Kwest said gently and, although Spied seemed far from okay with it, he nodded and walked away. I wanted to go to him—to tell him that he was important to me too, but all I could seem to focus on was my guitar and my producer. Tom closed the sound proof door before leaning against it casually, looking me over with a calculating expression before pushing himself away from the wall.

"So what do you want to do right now, Jude?" Tom asked with a shrug as I looked up at him wearily.

"Honestly?" I asked as he nodded. "I want to throw something." I said quietly as Tom raised a brow and then leaned over to pick up a glass cup before handing it to me.

"Then throw something." He answered simply as I just stared at him in shock. Okay, was I the one going off the deep end or was it him?

"Ummmm…you do realize everything in here is financed by Darius?" I asked slowly as if he were too ignorant to comprehend the obvious question. Tommy grinned before shrugging.

"And?" He inquired before coming to stand behind me to place a hand around the wrist I was using to support the glass. He leaned over enough that his lips almost touched my ear. "It doesn't matter, Jude. Right now what matters is that you need to throw it. I'll pay for the damages later so just toss the damn thing." He said matter-of-factly as he pulled my arm back for me. Shaking myself loose from his grasp, I smiled at him widely. Why the hell not! Putting all of my strength into it, I swung my arm forward and watched in mute fascination as the light hit the shards of glass as they shattered into a million little pieces. The loud splintering noise drowned out everything for a moment, even my own pain, before the room grew deathly silent. Suddenly a hand rested gently on my shoulder.

"Better now?" Tom asked almost in a whisper as I found myself, remarkably, shaking my head at his question. Tom just chuckled before walking across the room and selecting a few more breakable items from Darius's collection. I just gaped.

"You have a death wish. Quincy." I stated on a laugh as Tom shrugged and handed me each item one by one as I hurled them forcefully against the wall. I was on my fourth throw when it hit me that I suddenly didn't have it in me anymore—there just wasn't any more anger—only sadness and confusion. Tommy saw my face fall and, almost as if he were reading me like an open book, he handed me my guitar.

"Now you're ready to write." He said in a positive tone as I stared at him a moment in awe. This was why he was my producer—because he _knew_ my need for release and he knew exactly how to give it to me. Positioning myself solemnly on a stool, I laid my guitar over my legs and started to play—slowly at first watching Tommy shake his head at a chord he didn't like until I had finally tweaked it enough, I saw him nod. And then I started to sing.

_Constant confusion in moments of self-assurance _

_Running in place and getting nowhere_

_Reaching for something I keep forgetting_

_And when I ….. I_

I stopped, leaning over to pick up a pencil and chew with indecision on the end of an eraser. Tom chuckled.

"We've destroyed enough of Darius's things for one day, Jude. Here, try this." He said as he took the pencil gently from my hand before writing something down on the notebook beside me. I looked at it and then nodded with a smile.

_Constant confusion in moments of self-assurance_

_Running in place and getting nowhere_

_Reaching for something I keep forgetting_

_And when I remember, I find it isn't there._

_How do I compete in this marathon of defeat_

_When I can't seem to make it past the starting line_

_The finish seems so very far away_

_And the weariness is hard for me to define._

_Heading in two directions_

_Dead ends at every turn_

_I scream in rejection_

_As I feel the anger burn_

_What happened, what went wrong_

_How did the story end this way_

_Belting in endless song_

_The injustice, the bitter sway._

_Bending myself over backwards in denial_

_I wonder at my fortitude_

_Screaming at the world at large_

_I give you my bad attitude._

_Heading in two directions_

_Dead ends at every turn_

_I scream in rejection_

_As I feel the anger burn_

_And then the weariness of screaming_

_Ends the tirading deed_

_And I find all I have left to offer_

_Are chords of desperate need._

_I wonder in fear as I look for answers_

_But find only questions to torment me_

_I finally stop running_

_When I realize it isn't worth the speed_

_Heading in two directions_

_Dead ends at every turn_

_I scream in rejection_

_As I feel the anger burn_

And there—just like that—the song ended. It wasn't perfect, it never was at first, but looking into Tommy's silent face, I knew we had made a hit together again. We had written a song when I was too restless to do anything else. And, once again, Tom had been my lifeline through the storm—a lighthouse leading me back towards the shore. Jumping down from my stool, I walked over to him lazily only stopping once I was standing about a hand length away from him.

"You know what, Quincy?" I asked in a whisper. He just stood there gazing down at me with an unreadable expression on his face before shrugging as if asking 'what?' I tapped him lightly on the chest with my finger.

"You're better than a therapist." I said with a grin as he grinned back before a 'clicking' noise broke through our reverie. Turning around to look at the opening door, I saw Darius walk into the room stealthily before pausing at the sight of the broken glass littering the floor. He crossed his arms across his chest warily.

"I hope there is some kind of explanation for this." He said in a low tone, and I couldn't help it. I just laughed. Movement behind me made me glance over at Tommy as he leaned over close.

"Now that's what I like to hear." He said with a grin before taking his wallet out of his pocket and waving it in front of Darius's face. And in that moment, I just stared at him in silence, battling my own confusion at the feelings that swept over me when I was near him.


	4. Chapter 4

I walked out of the studio feeling much better than when I had entered it. It's amazing what release does for a person. Looking around at the people in the room, I noticed Spied sitting quietly in the corner, and I made my way over to him with trepidation—glancing only once back at the studio door where I could see Tommy bargaining with Darius about the price for the items we had broken. I let myself smile a little at the scene before turning back to Spied.

"I don't guess this seat's taken?" I asked quietly while motioning to the bare spot on the floor next to him. Spied didn't even look up. He just shook his head while I sighed heavily.

"I'm sorry Spied." I said with resignation as Spied looked at me from underneath lowered lashes.

"What's that all about, Jude?" He asked almost angrily as he motioned toward the studio door. I just blinked as I glanced over noticing Tommy watching us sympathetically as I did. As soon as Spied turned to look back at me, I saw Tom give me a quick thumbs-up sign and I tried very very hard not to laugh as I turned away.

"Why can't we make music like that together—the kind that just _screams_ out at you?" He asked before pausing a moment. "Okay, I know we rock when we play on stage together, but sometimes I want to be a part of that starting out point too where you're nothing but rage and passion. Why do you save that part of yourself for Tom 'the little man' Quincy?" Spied asked in aggravation as I stared at him in surprise. I hadn't been expecting so much emotion from him—so much turmoil. I was only used to his teasing remarks and petty jokes. As a matter of fact, he had me at a loss for words.

"I…I don't know. I guess it's because he helps me write them better. You and I are two very passionate people, Spied. We get together and we explode. Tom, on the other hand, is the opposite. He's the calm that counter balances my anger. He takes my drive, finds a way to reduce it to 10 miles an hour instead of a hundred, and then helps me pave out a roadway for the song. I need that, and I don't want our relationship to be affected by that need. Can you see it that way for me?" I asked resignedly as Spied just stared at me a moment before nodding in acquiesce.

"I guess I can see that about the two of us, but I don't have to be overjoyed about it all the time, Jude." He said matter-of-factly. I just nodded. I didn't expect him to. Spied rallied himself before tugging on my skirt and pointing to a ladder sitting next to us.

"I don't guess you'd climb up there for me, would you?" He asked on a chuckle as I slapped at him playfully. Now that was the Spied I knew and loved. The other guy, well, I just wasn't quite sure how to deal with him yet.

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**_Kwest and Tommy in the studio…_**

"Kwest can you help me with something?" Tom asked quietly as he looked up from the soundboard towards a phone book sitting on the table. Kwest followed his gaze before narrowing his eyes suspiciously.

"Am I going to regret it if I say yes?" Kwest asked solemnly as Tommy just rolled his eyes at him and motioned emphatically at the directory.

"Just look a number up for me, will ya?" Tom said in a slightly irritated tone as Kwest shrugged and leaned over to grab the book, instantly dropping it onto the ground as if it were a snake when Tom told him the name he wanted him to look up.

"You can't be serious." Kwest said in derision as Tom looked out the window obviously deep in thought. Kwest sighed.

"Tom, do you know what kind of complications that would cause? Hello, are you even listening to me?" Kwest said in exasperation as Tom glanced over at him with a quirked brow.

"I've thought about it, and I've decided the hell with the consequences. Are you satisfied?" Tom asked as Kwest shrugged and started flipping through the pages.

"Hell, it's your money." Kwest stated flatly as he handed the book to Tommy with a number glaring bolding up from the page. Tom picked up the phone and dialed. A voice channeled over the line.

"Hello, Strong Benson Realty. Susan Speaking. How may I help you?


	5. Chapter 5

Spied and I were still sitting against the wall teasing each other and fiddling with the chords on my newest song when Tommy and Kwest suddenly exited the studio looking both tired and a little frazzled. Something told me that there had been much more going on in that room than just mixing. Oh, to have been a fly sitting on that wall! No, or better yet, a fly in Tommy's Q's bathroom. _'Okay, stop it, Jude_,' I scolded myself firmly while feeling as if I had two little invisible devils perching on my shoulders.

I was still watching their progress as they made their way across the room when I heard Sadie clear her throat in that annoying 'I'm standing here and you better look at me' guttural growl, and I found myself suddenly looking at her satin wrapped legs and impatient high heeled toe as it tapped insistently in my direction. What? Did she think I was impressed? I know Spied was. He coughed and choked as he tried to look in any direction but at the swinging skirt that flowed in front of his nose, and I found myself clearly not impressed by his behavior. I looked at him murderously as he excused himself before standing up and walking across the room to stand next to Tommy and Kwest. The boy was smarter than I gave him credit for—he knew when to get the hell out of dodge.

I mean give **_me_** a little credit. I had enough problems with the men in my life—one of which happened to be this nasty little habit of theirs of being overly attracted to my gorgeous older sister. I mean I was fairly sexy right? I might be missing a few necessary assets but it wasn't something to sit on my bed and cry over. Was it? Sadie must have been tired of waiting for me to respond as I sat deep in thought because she took that unfortunate moment to lift that same mesh covered toe that had been tapping the floor in a rather catchy beat and kicked me lightly in the leg.

"Hey! What's you're problem?" I asked haltingly before standing up to swipe the dirt off the back of the short skirt I was wearing. Sadie just shrugged as nonchalantly as she could.

"Dad called." She said softly, and I knew just in the pretentious way she said those two small words that her simple statement was a loaded one.

"And?" I asked rather breathlessly as I waited for her to tell me something else that was guaranteed to knock me on my ass. Sadie just stared at me a moment before glancing over her shoulder at the people strolling around the studio. Obviously, she wasn't keen on anyone overhearing her because she leaned down close to my ear before saying anything else.

"He talked to mom, Jude. And she's already tied the knot with Don. It seems this was some sort of mad, spur of the moment decision for her, and after talking it over with dad, they've decided that dad will be named our guardian and your trustee again." Sadie answered quietly as she looked over her shoulder at Tommy and Kwest with an unreadable expression etched across her features. Something told me I should buckle my seat belt. My next question could lead to a very bumpy ride.

"And the house?" I asked with an audible 'gulp' as Sadie just stared at me a moment, looking suspiciously as if she were having a very hard time trying to find the right words to say to me.

"The house was sold this morning, Jude." She said in an even tone as I just looked at her in disbelief. So soon. It couldn't be. I looked around me for a moment trying to clear my thoughts before letting my gaze fall back onto Sadie's serious, mellow face. Okay, so it wasn't a joke.

"By who?" I asked almost in a whisper as Sadie sighed before crossing her arms over her chest and leaning against the wall heavily.

"By Tom Quincy." She said so softly I almost didn't hear her at first, and once I realized what she had said, then I kept telling myself that I must have heard her wrong. I shook my head dazedly.

"You can't be serious, Sades. That's ridiculous." I said on a small, hysterical laugh as Sadie just shrugged calmly.

"Crazy or not, he did. And he had terms. According to the realty company, he bought it only under the condition that the previous owners could continue to live in it undisturbed." Sadie said as she let her gaze hover in Tommy's direction—staring at him much longer than I felt comfortable with. But I didn't have it in me at the present moment to call her on it, or to even look over at him myself for that matter. I was still trying to grasp the idea that he had bought our house. Why? Why would someone buy a friggin' house for someone like that? Could he still love Sadie enough after their break up? '_Don't be stupid, Jude,_' I told myself scornfully. Deep down I knew why he had done it. Glancing over my shoulder, I saw him looking at me under lowered lashes, and I could tell when he realized I knew about his purchase because he pushed himself away from the wall where he had been standing before heading towards the door. Something told me he didn't want to be confronted about the whole situation. Damn, I was too busy still processing the information to care much for confrontation. Let him run away if he wanted to. There was plenty of time to catch him later.


	6. Chapter 6

Later came a little too soon for me because there was this nagging little buzzing piece of 'I can't leave it alone' mentality that I have unfortunately been cursed with that just wouldn't let me drop the subject. Or leave well enough alone for that matter. Slamming through the studio, I finally found Tommy reclining in the 'I go there when I am depressed' alleyway leaning against a wall with a pair of headphones resting on his ears. Walking over to him meaningfully, I pulled one of the headphones away from his face before letting it go so that it snapped against his ear. He jumped as he grabbed at the equipment before giving me a sour look.

"What the hell, Harrison?" He asked as he rubbed at the spot on his ear unconsciously. I just shrugged before positioning myself opposite him in the dark cement corridor.

"Why, Tom?" I asked with a shrug as I tapped Tommy lightly against the chest with my finger. He just gave me an "I don't know what you're talking about' look as I lifted my eyebrows sardonically.

"Don't even try that with me, Quincy. Just tell me why you did it." I said in a low tone as Tommy sighed and flipped off his CD player before throwing it into a duffel bag at his feet.

"Why do you always have to analyze things, Jude? Just take it for what it is. You have heard that saying 'don't look a gift horse in the mouth,' haven't you?" Tommy asked as he turned toward the studio door. I just grabbed him by the shoulder as he tried to push by me.

"I might over analyze things, Tom, but I've discovered that you've become really good at avoiding things—running away when the heat is on. Tell me, is that some sort of twisted defense mechanism?" I asked crudely as Tom opened his mouth up to retaliate, barely managing to even get his lips parted before the door banged open beside us causing me to jump backward in alarm. Tom sighed as Darius's head appeared around the corner, narrowing his eyes as he looked from me over to Tom and then back to me again. Finally he shrugged.

"Well, at least you two can't break anything out here. Now get in here. We have a board meeting in five minutes and you both have to be present." He said matter-of-factly as I lifted my brow in amusement before shrugging and following Darius into the building. It wasn't as if I hadn't gotten as much information as I could out of Tommy anyway because I knew without a shadow of a doubt that his stubborn lips would remain indomitably and impossibly sealed. But you can't blame a girl for trying, right?

I could feel Tommy's presence as he walked behind me toward the boardroom, and I almost shivered at the incredible need I fought to keep myself from turning around to glance at him. Darius stepped through a doorway and we followed at a leisurely pace only to freeze in surprise at the faces of those present in the room beyond. What the hell was going on here?

Darius grinned at my shocked expression before motioning toward two of the empty chairs still left at the crowded table, and Tommy and I gave each other an uneasy glance before taking our seats. Why would Darius invite the entire studio to one meeting if he didn't have some lascivious scheme up his sleeve? Ugghhhhhh, the quandary of anticipation! I tapped my fingers rhythmically on the surface of the wood in font of me, completely unaware of my actions until Tommy's hand suddenly settled over my knuckles, stilling my movements before transporting my hand from the gleaming tabletop to a casual position in my lap.

"Stop that." He mouthed to me with a small grin as I rolled my eyes, giving him a moment to settle back into his chair before lifting my hand and tapping the same spot over again. I smiled to myself as I felt him glaring at my back, literally enjoying annoying him until Darius called the meeting to order. Watching him at the dais positioned at the front of the room, my amusement immediately piqued even more as Darius revealed his next publicity idea.

"Okay guys, the Denim for Life event we had a few weeks ago went remarkably well with the proceeds from the sales going to raise education awareness. Because of the huge amount of money that people were willing to spend for a jacket worn by a celebrity, particularly the guys, a local charity sponsoring cancer and terminal illnesses, such as aids, got together with me and discussed the possibility of doing another such similar event. Due to the excellent publicity we received from the last event, and because we have had the need to already do some damage control for the studio, it didn't take much for me to agree to their request, and after much deliberation with some of their sponsors and with our own board, I think we have come up with quite a creative way to raise the bar on the amount of money this studio can bring in. Anyone care to take a guess what we decided to do?" Darius asked mischievously as we all leaned back in our chairs and shook our heads uneasily. Darius just shrugged.

"No takers?" He asked once more before grinning widely. "Well, then boys. This would probably be a good time to practice your suave, flirtatious charm because every guy in this room is going to be auctioned off for an exclusive date funded by G-Majors Studios with all proceeds from the bids going to charity." Darius finished with a smug grin as I glanced humorously at SME, Jamie, Liam, Kwest, Mason, and Tommy as their jaws literally hit the linoleum floor beneath our feet. I couldn't help it, I laughed. Oh, this was just too much fun. Looking at Darius, I grinned foolishly.

"They have to bring roses right?" I asked with a giggle as I looked around the room again. "No, wait! How about some kinky strip teasing, D? I've always had this strange and remarkable desire to see the irresistible Jamie Andrews in a g-string." I said with a laugh and a suggestive wag of my eyebrows as Jamie glared at me and Tommy kicked me 'hard' underneath the table. Ow! Rubbing at my now throbbing shin, I righted myself rather stoically before kicking Tommy back as I hard as I could. Hearing him grunt, I turned my attention back in satisfaction to Darius as he looked at the end of the table with a calculating gleam in his eyes.

"Don't knock it, Jude. All of you girls here at G Majors have just as much right to bid as the public. Something tells me it should be an interesting evening." He said with a small laugh as I felt more than one pair of male eyes burning into my visage. Lowering myself self-consciously down into my chair, I silently agreed with Darius's 'interesting' description. Something told me that my bidding was a very very bad idea. Maybe I should feign sick that night. Hmmmm…not a bad idea. But glancing up at Darius's intent expression, I had a feeling it would take more than a fake upset stomach to get me out of attending. Ahhhhh, the joys of indecision.

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**_Author's Footnote: Hey guys! Thank you so much for the reviews. I loved the fact that you guys like where I am going with the story. I'm always afraid that I'll post something that won't go over well so when I get replies from you guys, it makes me incredibly excited. So, I couldn't help it, I came up with this part of the story because, come on, who doesn't like the idea of being able to bid on Tom Quincy for a date. Let me tell ya, the N really should auction Tim Rozon off for a night. oh 'sigh' okay done with that. Let me know what you think guys. Lots of smiles. Please Please Please R&R._**


	7. Chapter 7

As the meeting adjourned and we all started piling out of the office, I realized rather belatedly just how late it was getting outside. The idea of going home was torture for me right now, but at this point, I didn't see how Sadie or I had any other option so I just bit my own tongue and went to grab Sadie by the arm.

"I don't guess you're ready to go?" I asked uncertainly as Sadie stared at me a moment before throwing an evil look in Tom Quincy's direction..

"Why don't you go ask our new Mr. Sugar Daddy if he'd like to come see his new piece of property?" Sadie asked in a biting tone as I raised my eyebrows at her sardonically. Bitter much?

"Sades, now is not the time to go all 'I hate my ex boyfriend' on me, okay? I mean, hell, forget about the studio. We need to go home and do some familial damage control." I said with an edge to my tone as Sadie looked over at me a moment before nodding as if saying 'whatever.' I knew it must be double hard on her—having lost mom out of the blue and dealing with the fact that my producer and her ex boyfriend had just bought our house. Hell, I was still having a hard time with it. But now was not the time to regress. Tom ambled over to us slowly with a look that pleaded for civility.

"Be at the studio at eight a.m. in the morning, Jude. The auction is scheduled for the day after tomorrow and Portia wants to fit you for a couple of dresses before we get started on the new demo." Tom said quietly while glancing uneasily at the two of us. I couldn't help sympathizing. I think I'd have that 'mouse caught between the cat's paw' look too if I were him. Then it hit me.

"Dresses?" I asked with a curious inclination of my head. Tom grinned.

"We have a cocktail party we have to attend tomorrow evening to promote the auction. I guess you could say it's a 'parade the meat in front of the noses of the customers before they actually get a chance to sample it' event." Tom said in a wry tone as I chuckled at his casual way of putting it delicately. Sadie just glared at me. _Geez, get over it already._ Okay, in all honesty, that isn't fair of me. I was still tripping over what happened between Tom and I on the day of my birthday, and I was supposed to be involved with someone else. How screwed up is that? Speaking of. Spied chose that moment to sidle up to us almost as if he were afraid that he was missing something important by not being involved. Hated to burst his bubble, but the only heat emanating in this little circle was the kind screaming off of Sadie's skin. Tom capitulated under the pressure.

"Just don't forget to get here on time, Jude." He said again before glancing once more at us uneasily before turning on his heel to walk away. Sadie's eyes narrowed as she followed his progress across the room before turning to me.

"Is your daddy done with you now, or do you have any more curfews we need to know about?" Sadie asked derisively as I placed both my hands on my hips in an 'okay you've finally done it' kind of gesture.

"Sadie…" I began caustically until I remembered that Spied had joined our little ménage a trios, and somehow I didn't think Tommy would appreciate it if I aired his financial investments out in the public. Besides, I had a feeling I would be starting a feud between the two if I did—the kind you see in old western flicks where the men proceed to see which guys can draw their guns faster. Nope, just wasn't going there. So I did the next sensible thing. I grabbed Sadie's keys and began walking purposely toward the exit knowing that Sadie would follow hurriedly after me. I mean, if you had ever seen me drive, you'd be finding a definitive way to stop me too. Hey, failing three driving tests is normal, right? It's not like I didn't pass it the fourth time. Even if the man who had been riding with me was hiding under the dashboard so afraid that he would have to give the test over to me again that he just signed off on the paper. A little fear goes a long way, let me tell ya.

And just as I predicted, Sadie's hand suddenly gripped me by the shoulder before leaning over to grab my hand, pulling the keys out of my grasp with little effort before stomping off in front of me. I shrugged at Spied as he sidled up next to me.

"What's her problem?" I asked teasingly as he raised a brow at me in mock horror.

"Jude, it's called survivor's instinct. You travel with you and you might as well sell your life away to the "Crash Test Dummy" industry." Spied said on a chuckle as I shrugged in a 'what can you possibly mean?' kind of gesture. Spied just smiled as he walked me to the door before stooping down to kiss me.

"It's one of the things I love about you, Jude—that wonderful ability of yours to make mistakes and laugh about it." He said with a laugh as I looked at him with narrowed eyes.

"Driving is not a mistake." I said pointedly as Spied laughed again.

"Honey, for you it is." He said before gently pushing me out of the door with his foot. I turned around to stick my tongue out at him childishly, but found myself staring into Tommy Q's blue gaze over Spied's shoulder instead. And I found I couldn't do anything but stare back at him before shaking my head quickly to remind myself what I was doing. Now, would be a good time to exit gracefully, especially once I realized that Spied was very aware of what had attracted my gaze so I just smiled tightly before running toward the car. I had other problems to worry about. Like the home situation and, lord knows, the auction.


	8. Chapter 8

_**Author's note: Hey guys! Wow! My computer has been completely down for days so I have quite a few new chapters to post. Bear with me. I am so excited that my story has turned out so much like the show. I had already written four new chapters when the Friday episode played and they were so very similar, I couldn't help but be excited. When I saw Sadie get hired as a secretary at G Majors though I did go back to a chapter I had written and added that. However, I have some major drama coming to the story that will excite you all (I hope) that probably won't be in the show. Please review guys. I have missed the reviews these past four days. So R&R. Smiles.

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The house was quiet when we arrived—almost as if it were a tomb designated for burial, and Sadie parked in the driveway while both of us just stared at the window to the darkening sky beyond speechlessly. Now what?

"I feel like I'm in a Wes Craven horror movie, and mom's going to walk out as part of the living dead." I said softly as Sadie threw me an 'oh please' look before slowly lifting the handle to open her door. I just shrugged and followed suit—just about to throw open my own door and step into the drive when my phone started vibrating wildly. Glancing at it, I sighed in trepidation as I flipped it open and, listening to the silent screams that vibrated throughout my head, I answered it woodenly.

"Do I get an award for best daughter day or something because there must be some reason that I warrant a phone call? Don't tell me you're in prison." I said sarcastically as Sadie paused in the drive to stare at me in disbelief. Oh, I suddenly felt very very sick.

"Jude, I'm just trying to make sure that you and Sadie are fine. I'm in California right now about to board a plane to Tahiti—Tahiti. Can you believe it?" Mom said in a rush as I just stared at the receiver in disbelief. She couldn't be serious, could she?

Mom, are you drunk?" I asked point blank as she grew silent a moment before laughing raucously.

"Of course not sweetie. I'm just delirious from happiness." She said a little too loudly as I held the phone away from my ears enough to keep them from throbbing. She must have expected me to say something then because the next thing I knew the line had grown deathly still.

"I'm sorry, Jude." She said in a whisper as I leaned against the side of the car heavily, barely able to move. I still couldn't say anything.

"It's not you or Sadie. You two had nothing to do with my decision. I…I just needed to get away for a little while—a vacation of sorts to clear up my head and keep myself from spiraling even further into manic depression. I won't be gone forever, Jude. Please, I just need a little time to breathe and accept what happened between your dad and I before I can function the way I should as your mother." Mom said quietly as I felt tears well up at the back of my throat. I knew she was right—she needed that time to heal, and the chaos of our lives couldn't give her that. Oh, how I wished I could hate her for it.

"When are you coming back?" I asked in a low tone as mom sighed on the other end.

"I don't expect to be gone longer than a couple of months. Can you and Sadie handle being alone that long? If you can't, Jude, I'll make some kind of arrangements for you." Mom said insistently as I shifted uncomfortably on the metal hood as Sadie began to circle me anxiously.

"It's fine, mom—we'll be fine, but what about the house? Why did you sell the house?" I asked emphatically as I kicked Sadie on the side of the leg to keep her from pacing. Between her and mom, they were driving me nuts. Mom just sighed again.

"We couldn't afford it, Jude. There was no way we could swing the mortgage and the bills on that place. I'm just sorry that I didn't manage things better. I didn't expect the house to sale until after I had returned. You know how long it takes for those kinds of things to go on the market. I just assumed I would have time to clear my head while people got a good look at the house and then I could worry about closing the deal when I got home. But, all in all, I guess it worked out for the best. I heard about Tommy Quincy buying the property, Jude. I was really impressed at the depth of his feelings for this family." Mom stated quickly as I stared disbelievingly at the phone. She was impressed? Damn, I was just plain floored. Sadie must have gotten tired of watching a one-sided conversation because she suddenly yanked the phone out of my grasp before pacing the lawn while launching into a tirade that could seriously break windows. I sighed heavily as I pushed away from the vehicle, stopping Sadie by grabbing her by the elbow before taking the phone back, telling mom to enjoy herself and be safe, and hanging the call up with a click. Sadie just gaped at me.

"What the hell did you do that for?" She asked just a little beyond being angry—more like completely furious. I just shrugged.

"Just let it go, Sades. She needs the time away. We can't change that. Hell, we're even old enough to understand it for that matter." I said with a slow shake of my head as I walked toward the dark house, thinking once again how forlorn and desolate it looked. Yep, just like a horror movie. I shivered at the thought before walking into the abode and slamming the door resolutely behind me. I had a song to perform tomorrow, and I was determined to be ready for it. No matter the conflict in my life. I was really really steaming by the time I reached my room—angry mostly at the fact that I was angry to begin with—when my phone suddenly vibrated again against my hip. I picked it up nonchalantly, expecting either Spied, Jamie, or dad to be on the other end.

"What?" I answered shortly as I sprawled out backwards on my comforter, trying my best to let the tensions just drain out of me. But it only took an instant for me to spring upward again like a damn jack-in-the-box when I realized belatedly just who was on the other end of the line.

"Teaches me to inquire after my favorite artist." Tommy said teasingly as I let myself recline again before answering.

"You caught me by surprise. I thought you were Spied." I said on a sigh as Tommy laughed.

"Remind me not to envy your significant other." He said on a chuckle as I smiled at my side of the phone.

"So, what are calling for big boy? Am I needed in the studio or something?" I asked as I sat up to turn on my bedroom lamp as shadows began to lengthen the room.

"Look out your bedroom window." Tom said cryptically as I glanced up at my curtains with a look of expectation. No, he couldn't be. Leaping up, I ran over to the casement before lifting the edge of the fringe enough to notice the blue color of his viper in the setting sun.

"I see the curtains moving, Jude." Tom said with a laugh as I quirked a brow at the glass panes.

"What are you doing here? If Sadie catches you, it'll be the start of World War III." I said caustically as Tommy sighed. I just stared down at his car with a look of wonder. When had Tommy ever just come up to the house of his own accord—never. Which meant either he needed something or something was up.

"Come down will ya? Catch a ride with me somewhere. I have something to show you." He said vaguely as I turned around and rushed towards my bedroom door.

"Hold on a minute." I whispered as I hid the phone behind my back and sneaked down the stairs as silently as I could before squeezing through the doorway without even missing a beat.

"You can hang up now." I said as I edged up to him from the side of my house. He flipped shut his phone and grinned at me before standing aside and holding open the door of his Viper. He was being suave. Oh yeah, he wanted something. The quandary was—what could it be?


	9. Chapter 9

Tom drove the car with such deep concentration that I was beginning to worry that he had forgotten I was sitting there next to him. I tapped him on the shoulder lightly, watching as he jumped in surprise at the contact.

"So where are we going James Dean?" I asked lightly as he glanced over at me for a moment before staring intently at the road again.

"You'll see, Jude." He said vaguely as I just shrugged before laying my head back against the seat, letting the cool evening air ruffle through my hair—biting into my skin as I reveled in the rightness of the moment. It was as if the breeze itself were cleansing, washing away all of my troubles and leaving behind only myself sitting in a viper next to a man I had come to care very deeply about. Tom glanced over at me with a small grin as he turned into the parking lot of an overhang.

"You're not asleep are you?" He asked in amusement as I closed my eyes and pretended to snore.

"And if I am?" I murmured softly as I listened to him reach for something in his backseat.

"Then you'll just miss your big surprise." He said in a nonchalant tone as I let my eyes pop openbefore turning to look at him with wide, expectant eyes.

"Surprise?" I asked almost giddily as I looked at an object he was holding wrapped in a brown paper bag before he opened his car door and stepped out into the night. He just chuckled softly.

"What is it about women and that one word?" Tommy said wryly. "You mention it, and the next thing you know, they'd do just about anything for you." He finished as a mischievous glint entered his eyes. I just smiled and jumped out of the car without using the door only because I knew it annoyed the hell out of him. Walking around the side of the vehicle, I leaned casually against the door next to him as I shrugged.

"I don't know about 'anything,' but I'll promise to save you at least one cup of coffee in the morning if you tell me what you're up to." I said with a quirk of my brow as Tommy laughed sincerely.

"You mean you'd actually keep from emptying the coffee pot for me. Wow! I'm duly impressed—must remember to bring bribes more often. Of course, how any normal human being can drink as much caffeine without dying of a heart attack is beyond me." He said as he reached into his back seat, pulled out a blanket, and then laid it ceremoniously across the hood of his car before climbing up and motioning for me to follow. I was definitely curious now as I shrugged and followed suit.

"You want me to be honest, Tom? I actually drink about three cups and then pour the rest down the drain before you enter the room." I said with a small laugh as he threw me an 'excuse me' look.

"What?" I asked on a giggle. "I just like to see you grouchy in the mornings. Besides, you're not missing out on much. They say coffee doesn't do a body good." I said humorously as Tom quirked a brow.

"I'd have to argue with the experts there." He said as he perused me with a look that made me blush from the top of my head to the bottom of my toes. Looking away, I glanced up at the evening sky before glancing back at him again with a look filled with curiosity.

"So, what are we doing here?" I asked softly. Tom just pulled out a small telescope and began fiddling with it as I watched in awe.

"Do you know what today is?" He asked softly. I just shook my head mutely as he looked up at the dark canvas encompassing the air as night fell fully over the overhang. He glanced at me before chuckling.

"It's the anniversary of when you first came into the studio as the new instant star." He said with a shrug of his shoulder as I felt my mouth fall open in astonishment. He remembered that. Wow! We had come a long way from the insulting comments of that first meeting to where we were now.

"I can't believe you kept up with that, but what does it have to do with this?" I asked in a hushed tone as Tom handed me the telescope and pointed at something in the distance.

"See that star over there?" He asked as I took the lens and held it up so that I could see through the hole before nodding. He grew silent a moment before answering.

"It's yours." He said finally as I almost dropped the scope in utter shock.

"Officially." He continued as he handed me a piece of paper from one of those companies that allows you to actually purchase a star. I didn't know what to say. I just peered up at the sky, and then back at him before laying back and gazing up at that particular spot in mute fascination.

"Why?" I finally whispered as he laid down next to me, our hair barely touching as he looked up at the sky along with me. He never answered me as we gazed upward and something told me it was because he wasn't really sure why he had done it himself. I'm not sure how long we actually laid there before Tommy suddenly sat up and looked down at me with a weary look.

"I think it's time I take you back home." He said almost sadly as I just nodded before hopping off the hood of his car, gazing once more at 'my' star before sliding into the seat next to him as he placed the key into the ignition. We didn't speak on the way home. We were beyond words at the moment, and when he pulled into the driveway, I couldn't even say anything as I climbed out of the car and waved at him silently. I finally just whispered 'thank you, Tom' as he nodded at me with a knowing look before pulling out of the drive. I waved until I couldn't see him anymore before turning to run into the house, up the stairs, and into my room before sliding out my bottom dresser drawer and grabbing my diary—wedging the new 'star' document between one of the pages before running my fingers along four beautiful words: _purchased by Tommy Quincy_.


	10. Chapter 10

A persistent knock at my bedroom door woke me up the next morning, and I threw my favorite teddy bear at it as I jerked my pillow over my head.

"Go away!" I yelled as I rolled over only to come into direct contact with my alarm clock, which to my dismay read 7:10. Oh, shit!

"Hey, if you don't want to hitch a ride that's fine with me, Jude Harrison, but I'd be lying if I didn't admit that I am dying to see what killer dress Portia has come up for you this morning." Spied said as I heard him lean heavily against my door. Oh, Jesus! I had forgotten that he had wanted me to ride with him this morning. Launching like a grenade out of my bed, I rushed into the bathroom slamming around as I managed to get a shower, brush on some lip gloss, and throw on a pair of holy jeans and a black "I live in my own little world, but that's okay because they know me here' logo tank top before pulling open my door ceremoniously. Spied cocked a brow as I nearly ran smack dab into his chest before placing both of hands on each of my shoulders and laughing incessantly at the top I had picked. I just shook my finger in his face teasingly.

"Don't laugh! You gave it to me." I said as Spied just grinned sheepishly at me as we made our way past mom's room, and I stopped suddenly as the pain ripped through me again—stabbing at me like the furious machinations of a B-rated slasher film. It's not easy losing someone you love, and it hurts even worse when you feel betrayed by them. Spied seemed to notice my discomfort because he grabbed me slightly by the elbow before leading me out the door. Something told me that he was trying his best to be there for me, but the more he tried, the more I just seemed to want to pull away. I'm not even sure why. When I'm with him, I just feel more keyed up somehow almost as if his passionate nature inflames mine—leaving me tired and drained. And the one person I didn't need to feel better around was the one person that managed to calm my spirit. What the hell was wrong with me? Why couldn't I just take the relationship Spied offered me and let everything else well enough alone. Ugggggghhhh! I practically growled at myself as I made it over to Spied's car only half-listening to his teasing antics as I let myself in—imagining as I did a blue-eyed Tom Quincy holding open his car door in order for me to enter. Ohhhh! I just couldn't stop could I? Spied smiled over at me about to say something that promised to be ultra witty when my cell phone buzzed and I sighed in immediate relief until I saw the name displayed in the window.

"Dad?" I said as causally as I could after flipping open the receiver. The silence that emanated through the line was tense and full of emotion.

"Are you and Sadie okay, Jude?" Dad finally asked as I shrugged even though I knew he couldn't see me. I could tell he was having a hard time with the whole ordeal just by the hoarseness that had crept into his tone, and I suddenly found myself so choked up that I couldn't speak, just kind of groaning as I fell into Spied's car. Spied must have known that I was silently telling him just to go ahead and drive to the studio because he started up the car and pulled out of the driveway as I sobbed slightly into the phone turning away from Spied as I did. Oh, it hurt! Dad sighed on the other end.

"I'm moving back in with you and Sadie, Jude. We'll find some way to make this work out, do you hear me?" He asked as I nodded at the phone.

"And Yvette?" I asked as I leaned heavily back into the seat.

"Will not be coming with me." Dad answered smoothly as I felt my eyes widen slightly. He must have noticed my unspoken shock because he sighed again.

"We'll still be together, Jude, but we won't be seeing each other for a while until you and Sadie, and even myself, can come to terms with what your mother did. I have a lot to make up for, Jude. I feel partly to blame for this. If only I had been able to love your mother enough not to have strayed then maybe…." He let his sentence hang unfinished as I heard him pacing from wherever he was—either at Yvette's or his office. I just sat there as Spied pulled into the studio parking lot—pulling open his car door and stepping out before walking into the building. We may not have the same connection as Quincy and I at times, but even he knew me well enough to know when I needed to be alone. Gathering my emotions in hand, I sighed with both relief and grief.

"Don't, dad. It's not worth finding someone to blame for this. I think, all in all, we all contributed to it somehow so if we start playing the blame game, then I'm afraid we'll never stop. I'm just glad you're coming home. I've really missed you." I said sheepishly as a shadow suddenly fell over my face. I turned sideways just in time to see Tom's Viper pulling in next to Spied's car. Boy, he was being brave! I arched my eyebrows in amusement. With the way things were between those two, Tom would be lucky if his tires weren't flat when he left that evening, but then again I think even Charles Manson would be afraid of Tom Quincy if he ever touched the holy viper. Dad had grown silent as Tom suddenly looked over at me as he exited the vehicle and just by the way he glanced at his watch, I knew I was late meeting with Portia. I just waved at my phone as I opened the car door.

"I've missed you girls too." Dad suddenly said as I paused on the pavement outside, letting myself rest against the side of the car with the door still hanging open. So many emotions were bombarding me right then as I looked up into Tom's eyes—watching his pupils dilate as he realized that I was hurting.

"Do you think she'll come back?" I whispered as I started kicking rocks with the toes of my shoes. Dad just sighed.

"I really don't know, Jude. I thought I knew her…I mean I was married to her for over nineteen years. But I never saw this coming, which makes me wonder either how much she has changed or how well I really actually understood her." Dad said slowly as I looked at the studio door over Tom's shoulder. I needed to get in there.

"We all wonder how much we actually knew her, dad. I just hope she comes back and gives us another chance at learning the woman we have called wife and mother all these years." I said as I finally kicked the car door shut before taking one step toward the studio door.

"I…uh…I have to go, dad. We'll be seeing you tonight?" I asked as I felt Tom's hand suddenly squeeze my shoulder. I couldn't even look at him.

"I'll be there, Jude. I'll even bring dinner." Dad said before hanging up the phone, and I just stared at the silent receiver before sighing heavily. Tom leaned over and snapped the contraption shut for me before slipping it into my pocket.

"Are you alright, Jude?" He asked softly as he placed his hand on the small of my back. "Jamie's filled me in on what's happened. I'm really sorry, Jude." Tom finished sympathetically as he walked with me into the studio. I just sighed. He had no idea how much he had already helped just by taking me to that overhang, but I didn't have it in me to tell him that. We had just entered the studio when I noticed Sadie sitting behind a desk near the front of G Major's, and I arched a brow as she scowled at Tommy before grinning widely at me.

"Okay." I said slowly. "Tell me you're not sitting there for the reasons I think you're sitting there for." I said teasingly as she shrugged and then nodded amiably.

"Let's just say that Liam was looking to fill a secretary position and I happened to meet all of his requirements." Sadie said with a shrug as I stared at her disbelievingly. She shrugged. "Besides I can pay you back now, Jude, So go in there and meet with Portia before she comes tirading back out here again." Sadie said with a wave of her hand as I grinned at her before walking towards the wardrobe room. Tom stayed behind to say something to Sadie, and I felt jealously rear its ugly head as I glanced back at them. Oh, bestow my double-sided heart.


	11. Chapter 11

The guys of SME looked awful guilty looking as I approached Portia from the side listening to her complain with only half an ear as I saw them whispering about something before glancing around the room. Something told me that they were up to something, and just from the way that Spied kept glancing over at Tommy Q, I was really starting to worry just a little about his intentions. I followed Vincent's stare to find myself looking into Tom's beautiful blue eyes as he watched me move around the room before Portia suddenly grabbed me by the arm and pulled me forcefully into an empty room as she pulled two brilliant, splendid dress creations from behind her back. One was red and strapless with a nipped waist and full skirt that would undoubtedly swing against my ankles as I walked. The waist had a sequined rose artfully sewn onto the left side of the waistline with small, delicate red beaded pearls that came off the bloom like vines trailing down one side of the skirt to the hem. It was absolutely brilliant and must have taken a long time to make because it was most definitely hand sewn. The other dress was gold and looked as if it would undoubtedly fit my body like a glove with a slit that went from the waist all the way to my thigh, and while it was eye catching, there was just something very sophisticated and sexy about that beautiful red dress—something that yelled 'look at me,' and for the first time I actually saw that dress the way Sadie saw all clothes. I just had to have it.

"Do I have to pick one?" I asked Portia subtly as Portia grinned when she saw the appreciative gleam in my eye.

"Actually no. You get to wear both. One is for the cocktail party tonight and the other is for the auction tomorrow night. The only decision you have to make is which one you want to wear when. You just have to remember that whichever you pick for the auction is also the dress you'll wear out to 'The Gold Medallion'" Portia said quickly reiterating the fancy restaurant that Darius had selected for the auction dates. Once a man was selected, then they were to escort the women to the romantic locale—complete with flowing fountains and beautiful chandeliers—to dine and dance until at least the strike of midnight. I looked from each dress and almost sighed with the dilemma but something told me to save the red dress for the auction and to go for the gold tonight. Maybe it was those little demons I had riding on my shoulders because I knew that if I wore that dress then unimaginable things could happen and I wasn't sure if I was ready for that yet. Or maybe it was because I was. Oh, what was I thinking! Now, after everything that had happened, I just hoped I could manage to stay focused on my music for the rest of the afternoon. Lord knows, I needed to lose myself in it.


	12. Chapter 12

**_At the cocktail party later that night…_**

I felt like a queen as I stood in front of the mirror of the girl's lounge while waiting for Sadie to put some finishing touches on a stunning turquoise dress that dad had insisted she let him buy for her. Of course, Sadie hadn't argued, and I was glad he had done that for her because she really needed to feel beautiful. Turning back to my image, I sighed at the way my dress clung—self-consciously smoothing my fingers down the sides as my hair swirled around my shoulders and a pair of gold studded earrings swung from my ears. Portia had insisted that the makeup artists swirl a bit of gold glittered eye shadow on my eyes, and my pupils practically glowed from the effect. All in all, they had done a brilliant job on me. Now, if only I felt as stunning as the dress made me feel. Sadie finally turned to me with a smile.

"Let's go introduce that room to the two brilliant Harrison sisters." She said with loud exuberance as I raised a brow at her and grinned magnanimously as she pulled me ceremoniously from the room, although I had to pull on her arm to remind her that I was wearing heels that were a little too tall to run in. The room was dim and filled with crowded bodies and small conversations as Sades pushed open the door, and I felt like some strange, alien intruder as we made our way through the chaos. Darius stopped us several times to introduce us to his protégés before clearing a path for us to the stage. I saw Spied smiling at me from beside the dais and I waved at him before separating from Sadie and moving in his direction. Jamie stood beside him, and he whistled at me in a low tone as Patsy slapped him on the rump.

"Watch it big boy. I know how to kill someone just by sticking my fingers through their eye sockets. Care for me to demonstrate?" Patsy remarked wryly from beside Jamie as he rolled his eyes and pinched her teasingly on the cheek.

"Don't worry sexy. I still prefer my women a little on the dark side. Just don't pull a vader on me and end up being related to me because by all means, I don't play that kind of game." He said on a chuckle as Patsy rolled her eyes and I grinned at the two. Jamie was a huge, and I mean huge, part of my world. I couldn't make it through half my dramas without him. He smiled at me sheepishly as Spied suddenly grabbed my chin and turned my face towards him.

"You look absolutely delicious." He said in that sing-song voice that so characterized him. I grinned at his 'devil may care' body wrapped in a pretentious black suit, and I couldn't help but appreciate the affect myself.

"You don't look so bad yourself, Johnny Cash." I said as he pulled me towards him and dipped me in a mock bow over his arm.

"Damn, I was hoping that dress would be cut lower." He said as he looked conspicuously down my V-cut top before lifting me back up. I swiped at him with the back of my hand as I looked curiously around the room.

"Have any of you seen Tom?" I asked suddenly as Spied's eyes narrowed and Wally and Kyle coughed incessantly in the background. I felt incredibly bad about the fake cases of tuberculosis the boys suddenly seemed to have developed as they choked their way over to the punch bowl. Oh, yeah something was definitely up.

I was walking through the back of the building still looking for Tom as I walked suddenly into a small hallway off to the side of the room assuming that it led to a bathroom in the back. I was incredibly shocked when I ran into a very agitated Tom Quincy instead—covering my mouth with my hands trying not to burst out laughing as I noticed his dilemma.

"Tell me you're not trying out for America's Next Top Model." I said on a snicker as he glared at me from the corner of the room.

"Ha ha ha. Something tells me that your home boys out there are about to re-discover their childhoods because I am seriously about to punch them back into the last decade." He said as he lifted his arms sardonically. I _knew_ the guys had been up to something. I circled him critically as I looked at his suit which had visibly been shortened in both the arms and the legs making him look as if he were wearing capris and a short-sleeved suit top. Wow, the guys had really gotten creative. It's a good thing I knew where Portia hid her emergency wardrobe.

"Oh come on now. I really like the 'Alice in Wonderland' look you're going for there, Quincy. I must admit that I really find those 'make you larger' drinks are really the big things these days. Quite a fad you know." I said humorously as he snorted in derision before perusing me appreciatively.

"You must have missed the memo then, Harrison, because you look splendid, almost like a Greek goddess stepping off Mt. Olympus to flirt with us mere mortals." He said seriously as I felt my jaw drop at his compliment. Oh, he had **_so_** said the right thing. Pulling on the collar of his shirt, I motioned for him to follow me with a wry quirk of my finger.

"I'm going to be your savior tonight, Quince, so let's make sure we correct this wardrobe malfunction you seemed to have…um…stumbled into." I said with a small cough as he raised a brow before clearing his throat audibly. Something told me he was enjoying the view as I led him into a small room just off the girls' lounge. Pulling open the door, I started leafing through a stack of saran wrapped garments until I came up with a bag marked 'TQ-spare.' Tom smiled thankfully as I handed him the garment, and my jaw literally fell to the carpeted floor as he suddenly unbuttoned the front of his shirt before dropping it ceremoniously to the ground. I just couldn't help but gape as he pulled the new one on and he chuckled as he took a sudden step toward me. I just gulped.

"Would you like to button it, Harrison?" He asked mischievously as I stared wide-eyed at his naked torso. I had barely remembered how to breathe when he laughed and buttoned the front slowly with a pointed purpose.

"Now would be a really good time to turn around, Jude." He said huskily as I heard him unzip the front of his pants. Oh, Dear God! I spun around and squeezed my eyes shut as tightly as I could as I heard the sound of clothes being re-arranged behind me. God help me, but I was on fire! Tom cleared his throat and I turned back around to find that the spare suit was, thankfully, a perfect fit.

"I guess I owe you one." Tom said with a wag of his brow as he held out his hand to me. I grinned as I placed my fingers into his palm, allowing him to lead me out into the dark rooms beyond—letting the crowd of bodies press in around us as we headed for the stage. Spied's eyes darkened as we approached them, and I pulled my hand away from Tom as I hid it behind my back as if it would make me feel less guilty. For God's sake, I had practically watched Tom strip, and the only thing I could think about was 'why the hell had I turned around?" I almost groaned as Spied motionedto the stage.

"We need to go on." He said quietly as he glanced conspicuously at Tom.

"A little late aren't we Quincy?" He asked with a gleam in his eyes as Tom perused him in disgust.

"I found myself suddenly a little 'short' on time." Tom remarked wryly as the tension in that room revolved around us like a meandering, thick fog. I quickly pushed myselfbetween the two.

"Definitely time to go on." I said emphatically as I grabbed my guitar and headed toward the stage. The lights dimmed as Darius pointed at the stage before whistling and announcing his Instant Star while giving me a look that said 'make it good.' I looked over at Tom before turning to the guys and telling them to play the chords for the new song we had been going over. Spied looked at me strangely as Kyle and Wally smiled and started in on their instruments. Spied soon followed suit and I let them solo in an intro for the piece before I finally began to sing.

In the distance I saw a light

Like a beacon in the night

Shining a way, I follow bemused

My mind is all confused

Dejected and betrayed

Hurt and desperate, I cry

I run, my debt unpaid

My world becomes a lie.

Chorus:

It's a desperate need I feel

As it consumes my very soul

Grabbing at my heart

Taking utter and complete control

You've buried yourself there

Under my tarnished skin

Becoming my source of air

My one forbidden sin

You give me courage

You allow me to be afraid

Teaching me that strength

Is fear that's being slayed

Chorus:

It's a desperate need I feel

As it consumes my very soul

Grabbing at my heart

Taking utter and complete control

You are my private torment

My need for retribution

You are dreams I've spent

In disquieting distribution

A growing object, nurtured

You are like a seed

My soul is constantly tortured

You are my desperate need.

I finished on a halting note as I noted Darius's nod of approval before bowing slightly at the audience and exiting near the back of the stage. It always happened without me actually realizing I had done it. On occasion, I wrote a song here and there about other people—their lives and how they have affected mine, but then there are those songs that I don't realize that I have written for 'him' until I have belted them out for all the world to hear. This one was about my constant battle between loving the man I was already with compared to the man I couldn't seem to live without. And both men seemed to know it. Ahhh, my resplendent need for hopeless complications. I had to fix this—I had to make this problem go away. But how?


	13. Chapter 13

Tom looked at me with a grin plastered across his face as I sidled up to him at the punch bowl a few minutes later—clapping at me as I did a mock bow in front of him.

"That was fantastic, Jude." He said softly as I lifted a brow sardonically.

"And here I thought you'd be downright mad that I performed a song that you didn't work on with me first." I said sheepishly as Tommy shrugged.

"You're an artist, Jude. Sometimes I make your music better and sometimes your emotions are enough to create magic on their own." He said knowingly as he leaned over and grabbed a glass of punch before handing it to me slowly. Every nerve in my body felt on end as I lifted the cup up to my lips knowing that Tommy was watching every subtle movement, every tiny sip. I almost couldn't swallow the drink down the back of my throat as I gazed up at him from the corner of my eye, and I knew just from the way he peered at me and then up at the crowded room that it had become way too hard for him to pretend he didn't feel anything for me anymore. His words still rang through my head every night as I laid in my bed_—'Sadie and I didn't work' he said. "Why?" I asked quietly. "You know why." He answered in torment_.—Of course, I knew why. It was the reason I was having a harder and harder time allowing Spiederman close to me. Tom quietly excused himself as I watched him walk across the room to talk to Kwest, and I turned suddenly to find Spied standing directly behind me causing me to jump guiltily in alarm.

"I don't guess you'd like to dance with me, Jude?" He asked almost mechanically as I looked at him with a look of trepidation before smiling and nodding sincerely.

"I can't resist saying yes." I said with a chuckle as I raised a brow at Patsy and Jamie already moving around the center of the room like a really bad imitation of the 'Dirty Dancing' era. Okay, if I'm being honest, Patsy was rubbing up against Jamie like a content cat while Jamie was looking around the room nervously hoping no one would be the wiser. Boy, was he easy to embarrass. I couldn't help but laugh at the two, and I saw Jamie look up at mewith a pointed expression that read, 'Watch it, Harrison. I know dirty little childhood secrets about you that the tabloids would die to own.' I just grinned and wagged my brows at him as Spied led me out onto the floor. We were half way through the dance when I noticed Kyle and Wally going to stand inconspicuously on each side of Tom, and something told me by the way they were innocently sipping their drinks and by the way Spied kept edging us closer and closer to them that something was up again. I looked up at Spied warily but he didn't even glance down at me as he stared pointedly at his target. Damn, I hate when I'm right. Spied put out his foot then causing me to trip slightly almost as if it were an accident, and I managed to bump Kyle who 'accidentally' spilled his drink all over the front of Tommy's tux while Spied stumbled and fell into Wally whose drink did the same thing. I stared in horror as Tom didn't even flinch—just stared at Spied as if he better make a run for it. Spied threw his arms up in mock horror.

"Oh damn, Quincy! Can I get you some napkins?" Spied asked sarcastically as he grabbed a pile of paper towels and leaned in close to Tommy's shirt. Tom grabbed Spied's wrist firmly and held it away from his chest.

"I wouldn't if I were you." Tom uttered through clenched teeth as Spied lifted up on the balls of his feet, taking his arm and shoving at Tom forcefully trying to get him to back away. Tom released him just as Spied managed to land a small blow to the middle of Tom's chest. The people around us grew deathly silent as Tom edged close to Spied, and I realized rather belatedly that a fight was about to ensue between the two until someone suddenly pushed between them angrily.

"That's enough!" Darius shouted as Tom and Spied glared at each other from across the small barrier that Darius created. Spied spat at the floor as Tom shrugged in agitation while pulling on his suit jacket with a look of disgust. Darius just sighed before leaning in to whisper low enough that only those closest to him could hear.

" You guys really want at each other that much? Huh?" He asked as Spied looked at the ground while Tom stared Darius straight into the eye cynically.

"Why don't you ask kindergarten boy that question, D, because he's certainly one to play games." Tom remarked as I looked over at Jamie with a look of bewilderment. Jamie shrugged as Darius sighed.

"Fine boys, then let's make sure we profit some out of this strange, messed up feud you two have going on, huh?" Darius said cryptically as he stepped back and turned toward the crowd. Looking around, he cleared his throat before waving his arms in a commanding gesture.

"Alright folks! You guys were just privy to a very exclusive, very exciting preview of G Majors next major charity event—a telethon focused around a competitive fighting match between Tommy Q of the Boyz Attack fame and Vincent Spiederman of the Spiederman Mind Explosion." Darius announced before glancing back over his shoulder angrily as the rest of us just gaped at him in shock.

"And you two better make it good." Darius stated with a growl before turning to walk away.

* * *

_**Author's footnote: Okay guys, there it is for now. Will be posting more soon. I hope you are all enjoying this so far. Next comes the auction and the Tom/Spiederman face off before Jude's world suddenly explodes again as things take a turn for the worst. What happens when Tommy walks away and Jude discovers a secret about him that causes her to question her faith in him. And what happens when their forbidden attraction becomes a thorn in both their sides as stolen moments and stolen glances cause things to explode at G Majors Studio. Will Jude walk away or will she stay and fight for her place as an artist. And when tragedy strikes the Harrison household again, will Jude come back from it standing on her own two feet. Please read. Things are just heating up. Lots of smiles to you guys and please, please , please R&R.**_


	14. Chapter 14

_**Author's note: Hey guys. Hope you are still reading. I intended to upload this morning but for some reason the story wouldn't go on there. Things are really starting to heat up. I'm writing this especially for the ones who reviewed. Thank you so much for sticking with the story. Hope you guys are thrilled by the upcoming events. Please R&R. Smiles.

* * *

**_

Have you ever had that one really awkward moment in your life where you know that everyone is expecting you to, I don't know, do something? And how many people out there when faced with that awkward moment actually does something about it? Hmmm…let's just say not very many. That's why one of the biggest comedic moments in movies and books is when the main character freezes up, comes to an impasse that they can't seem to conquer. Right now, as I watched people departing the cocktail party and darting to and fro to their respective vehicles, I realized with quite a bit of profound clarity that I felt as if I were sitting on the button of a bomb mechanism and if I moved, then the whole damn place would blow. I saw Spied looking at me, and I found it rather hard to look into his eyes as I smiled in his general direction. And the sad thing was, the tension between us was absolutely and utterly my fault. It was all about that seemingly inane habit I had of screwing everything up.

"Hey…you okay, Jude?" I heard someone ask as Jamie suddenly pulled a chair up to the edge of the stage where I was sitting and straddled it in front of me. I just shrugged.

"I feel like someone has taken a fork and scrambled my brain with it." I told him softly as he chuckled under his breath.

"Nice visual imagery, Harrison. It's really doing fantastic things for my digestive tract." Jamie joked as I just looked up at him forlornly. His expression fell as he sighed heavily.

"Hey…" He began before pausing to look out over the room behind him. "Jude, you really need to quit blaming yourself for everyone else's emotional turmoil. You might be able to figure your own feelings out better if you quit worrying about hurting everyone else's. Just disregard everything except how you feel and then ask yourself which of your feelings is the strongest." Jamie said softly as he let his forehead rest gently against mine. I smiled up at him as I pulled away enough I could look into his face.

"When did you become such a wise old man?" I asked teasingly as he pretended to fluff his feathers like an over-bearing peacock.

"It's all those classic episodes of Mr. Wizard and my geeky Gandolf/Obi Wan Kenobi complex. I told you it would all pay off someday." He said cheekily as I chuckled and jumped down off the stage before grabbing one of his hands.

"Your cuticles are looking a little rough, Andrews." I said suggestively as Jamie shook his head in a 'uh uh, no way' kind of gesture.

"You're not painting my fingernails or anything even resembling my fingernails, Jude Harrison. I quit letting you do that when you were upset when we turned thirteen." Jamie said with a sheepish grin as I pulled him into a hug.

"We're two peas in a pod, you and I, aren't we?" I asked quietly as Jamie nodded before standing suddenly at attention when Spied approached us from the side. Jamie squeezed my hand one last time before stepping away.

"Catch you later, Jude?" He asked as he started to stroll toward the door. I nodded at him before turning toward Spiederman. I really wasn't sure how to deal with him right now, but I didn't have any choice.

"Feeling better?" I asked sardonically as Spied threw me an 'I don't get you sometimes look' before pulling me into his arms and kissing me roughly. I would have enjoyed his passion once, but Jamie was right--by paying attention to my own feelings, I realized that now I felt only pain. Pushing myself away gently, I looked up him quietly. Spied sighed.

"I need you to tell me why I suddenly feel as if only one of us is working at this relationship?" Spied asked in a hushed tone as I stared down at the floor. I couldn't discuss anything with him until I had a chance to discuss it with my brain first so I just shook my head.

"I can't right now, Spied. Why don't we just go home and sleep off all of the emotions we've managed to stir up tonight and talk about this again when we're more clear-headed." I said on a sigh as Spied shook his head before grabbing his car keys.

"You riding with Sadie?" He asked as I nodded woodenly. He nodded back at me before turning to walk toward the door, stopping only once to glance over his shoulder.

"I'm not going to keep letting you run away from this, Jude. You'll have to face it sooner or later." Spied said as I felt my shoulders slump, wincing as he slammed through the door. He was right. I knew that. Deep down, I knew that.

"You're doing the same thing to him that Tommy did to Sadie." A voice said knowingly from behind me, and I whirled around to see Kwest leaning casually against the stage. What was this—psychoanalyze Jude night?

"What do you mean, Kwest?" I asked with a frown as I picked up my guitar and placed it into my case. Kwest just shrugged.

"You know what I mean, Jude. You, as well as everyone else, watched Tom drift away from Sadie, you watched him quit taking her calls, you watched him pull away piece by piece closing himself off all because he didn't feel the same way about her that she did for him. And you also saw how that relationship ended. It exploded. You two are really messed up, you know that? I can't say I agree with this messed up electric charge you and Tom seem to have for each other, but sometimes I wonder if the two of you aren't cut from the exact same cloth." He said almost in a whisper as I felt my entire body go cold at his description. Dear God, he was right! After all that drama and anger I had thrown at Tom for the way he had treated Sadie, and I was doing the same exact thing. What the hell? Kwest seemed to realize when it clicked in my brain because he suddenly pushed away from the stage in order to walk over to me and wrapped his arms around my shoulder.

"It's one of the reasons I wasn't angrier at you for asking him to come back as your producer. I mean, come on, Jude. It was inevitable. I knew that as long as Tom Quincy is at G Majors, you two can't seem to stay apart longer than a week and, even then, you two are so hard to deal with, the whole office has to pass around a shared prescription of Valium." Kwest said with a small smile quirking his lips as he squeezed my shoulders and then turned me toward the door.

"Go home, Jude. We have a long day ahead of us tomorrow." Kwest said as he turned away and walked out another exit. I just watched him go in mystification. Oh Lord, the thoughts bombardingmy body and brainwere going to send me into a spiraling nervous break down. Kwest was right. I needed to sleep.

"You need a ride home?" A voice—his voice—asked from behind me. I just froze.

"I think I've got it covered, Tom, but Thank you." I said softly as I tried my best to walk away, but to my horror, I found my feet frozen to the floor like some uncanny nightmare where you try your best torun away but your body doesn't listen to its own brain signals. Why is it that I could run from Spied, but that I found it incredibly difficult to do it with Tommy? Tom just sighed from behind me.

"Jude…" He began as I felt his body close in on mine almost as if we were magnets being played with by a child. I couldn't not look at him. It just wasn't in me, and my body, not of its own volition, spun around to face him. He was so close—so so very close. Our lips were almost touching, I could feel his breath ease across my cheeks, and I could see the pupils of his eyes dilating as his lips got so close to my own that you could barely slip a piece of paper between the two of us. I sighed as I realized that I could even make out the slight stubble that covered his jaw, and I had the uncanny desire to want to feel its roughness against my palm—letting it scratch the delicate skin until my world just dissolved into nothing but a sensualistic realm of sensation. We closed our eyes at the same time, and when mine opened back up, I realized that he had stepped away. Neither one of us said anything. We just stood there staring at each other.

"Jude…" He tried again, but I held my hand up in front of his mouth. I wasn't going to let him say it was a mistake. Hell, for once I _wasn't_ angry at him. I was actually glad he had stepped away. It would have tore me apart being with Spied but sitting here loving Tommy. I needed to sleep.

"I'm going to go find Sadie." I said softly as he nodded. Passing by him, I stopped for a moment next to him as he grabbed my hand, and I wanted to press my body into his although I managed only to squeeze his fingers back before we both let go and walked in opposite directions.


	15. Chapter 15

**_The next day…_**

The day of the auction dawned bright and sunny, and I entered the studio that morning to be bombarded by the excited buzz of every female within a hundred mile radius while the guys, on the other hand, just looked plain depressed. I grinned at the faces surrounding me as Jamie groaned in the corner, SME preened at the female attention, and a slight glance of a Ralph Lauren shirt peeking out from one of the studio doors clued me in to the fact that Tom Quincy was just plain hiding. I couldn't blame him. I had already been asked to join a betting pool on who could dish out the most money for the man, and by the time I walked away after shaking my head good-naturedly, a catfight had ensued between two of the girls. Oy! What a predicament, but at least Darius would draw in the dough.

"Worried much?" I asked Kwest humorously as I saw him duck toward the studio door behind me. Kwest shrugged at me as he looked around himself cautiously.

"Don't you know not to stop a man intent on escape?" He asked with a desperate look etched across his face as he ducked into the studio behind Tommy' silhouette. Boy, you'd think the guys were headed to the guillotine instead of a dinner. Spied edged up to me before draping an arm casually across my shoulders.

"You ready for tonight, sexy?" He asked with a teasing glint in his eyes as I smiled up at him.

"What makes you think I'm going to bid on you, hot pants?" I asked as I shrugged nonchalantly. He just chuckled as he looked around the room meaningfully.

"You could always end up with Jamie, and worry all night long about the voodoo curses Patsy is probably brewing up even as we speak for anyone who wins him, or you could end up with Kyle or Wally." Spied remarked slyly as I raised a brow in mock horror before gripping my chest in a lame attempt at pretending I was having a heart attack.

"Oh the horror!" I cried as I smiled up at Spied teasingly. I was just glad he was back to his old 'devil may care' self even though I knew I had to face reality sooner or later. I saw Liam walk past us slowly, and I quirked a brow upat him seductively.

"Of course, I've kind of had my eye set on ol' Liam here the past couple of days." I said with a suggestive wag of my brows as Liam stopped in his tracks and threw me an 'excuse me' look before smiling sardonically. I almost shivered at the unfamiliar expression.

"I ought to hold you up to that, Jude Harrison." Liam said formally as he turned and walked away stiffly while Spied and I dissolved into a very childish fit of giggles. Oh, it felt so good to laugh! I saw Portia motioning for me from the side of the room and I rolled my eyes as I turned toward her.

"I'm being paged." I said woefully to Spied as he kissed me lightly on the forehead before kicking my rear with his shoe.

"Go get all dolled out." He said cheerfully. "I don't take bums out to dine with me." He said with a small laugh. I just grunted.

"Coming from a man that eats at Caveman Days every other day." I mumbled teasingly as I headed in Portia's impatient direction. A glimpse of red behind her almost had me skipping as I felt the material calling my name. Oh, the joys of having your own wardrobe consultant. I was just about to enter the room when a loud clearing of the throat behind me made me whirl around expectantly to find Tom Quincy motioning toward an empty room. I scrunched my eyebrows up in curiosity. What the hell could he want? It was not even close to time for me to record. I looked back at Portia who was now tapping her foot to a very murderous tune in her head. Tom held his hand up in a gesture of peace.

"Just give me one minute with her, will ya?" He asked incessantly as his ex-wife literally growled before spinning around to enter the clothing closet—leaving us standing alone near the door of Studio 1. Tommy looked around him cautiously before grabbing my hand and leading me into the darkened interior of the room. I just followed behind him in stunned curiosity as he slammed the door behind us before trapping me against the glass.

"Okay, Tom. I can't say that I'm very displeased with this sudden interruption…but…um…" I said haltingly as my breathing quickened—letting my sentence fade into oblivion as Tom's face suddenly came within an inch of my own before his hand melded against my lips. Every nerve ending stood to sudden attention.

"I need you to do me a favor, Jude." He said quietly as I nodded mutely at him, moving my lips against the palm of his hand as I tried to speak against his skin. His eyes locked with mine as he slowly removed his hand while staring at his palm a moment as if he had felt the same electric charge I had.

"What are you getting at, Tom?" I asked with foreboding as he quirked a brow before placing his hand into the pocket of his jeans and pulling out what looked like a very large wad of cash. Pressing it into my palms, he wrapped his hands around my closed fist as he sighed.

"Promise you'll bet on me if anyone that even comes close to resembling some unnamed participants in my past comes up with the highest bid. Please." He said in genuine dismay as I cocked a brow at him in amusement. He really didn't want to spend time with Sadie or Portia that much? I couldn't help but nod. I mean, considering the amount of women that would be there, there was no way either of them would come up with the highest bid. Could they? Orwas I secretlyhoping they would. I just nodded again in aquiescence. Tom smiled down at me as he turned the door knob slowly behind my back. I swallowed painfully around a lump in my throat as Tom whispered 'thank you' against my ear, and I shivered as I turned around and fled the room. One look at Spied's laughing face as I reached the wardrobe closet, and the truth hit me. What had I done? I unclenched my fist to stare at the money in my hand and I gasped as I saw the amount that was wadded up there. Holy shit! Tom had given me over twenty thousand dollars. Oh geez, oh damn! I was in for it now.


	16. Chapter 16

The rest of the day progressed way too fast for me as Portia had me meet with a make-up artist and hairstylist before I could even slip into the dress and, one look at myself once I did, even had me swooning. I twirled in front of Portia's full-length mirror in utter amazement at the effect. Wow! Portia grinned from behind me as I sighed in stunned disbelief. I didn't even feel like myself as I touched the elegant up-do the female hairstylist had given me. The dress was everything I had imagined it to be and more. It clung to my upper curves like flowing water while the skirt swirled around my ankles and the beaded rose accentuated the nip of my waist. My hair was pulled up on top of my head in a cascade of curls, and a diamond studded necklace winked up at me from around my neck.

"You look beautiful." Portia whispered as I grinned widely at her before throwing my arms around her neck in appreciation. The door beckoned to me, and I turned to exit it with a flourish. I had an auction to go to, and I felt the butterflies literally turning somersaults in my stomach as I pushed open the door even though I knew the room beyond was empty. Spied was waiting for me outside, and I took a deep breath as I headed toward the limo Darius had reserved for us all. The night outside was chilly and I hugged myself shakily as I first caught sight of Spied and the rest of the gang lounging near the curb waiting for Portia and I before heading toward the event. Spied's jaw dropped to the ground before he hurriedly held out his hand and pulled me into a gentle embrace.

"You look amazing." He said in awe as I stared at the pavement below—too afraid to look up at the one person whose opinion mattered way too much to me. Still looking down, I followed the group into the car as we headed out, and I didn't actually look up again until we entered the building where the auction was being held. Something told me I was in for a very eye-opening night.

Dancers twirled to lively music as we piled in and everyone clapped as Darius motioned for all the men to head up towards the stage in the center of the room. The dancers grew still, and I stifled a laugh as the guys moaned before doing as Darius commanded. Sadie sidled up to me as the auctioneer began to talk in hurried sentences—introducing each man with ease and self-assurance. I knew I was in trouble the moment the auctioneer pointed at Tommy Q. Oh, why did they have to have him go up there near the front of the line? I had been desperately holding out onto the hope that Spied would go first, but now as I watched the announcer grin widely, I suddenly felt Tom's money burn into my naked palm like a brand.

"Okay, now here's our next wonderful morsel for the female fans, and because of his natural good looks and personal charisma, we're going to start his bid at two thousand dollars." The announcer said with a huge grin as she motioned for Tom Quincy to take the stage. I couldn't help but laugh as he walked up the stairs while quirking that sexy brow of his at the female audience, initiating a series of yells, screams, and a monotony of "I love you, Tommy's" as he took a suave bow and stood slightly off to the side of the stage. I'll just bet he was feeling really pimped out right about now. I chuckled as the bids began, flowing across the room like a well-oiled machine—changing gears so fast I couldn't even blink. I was really starting to enjoy Tom's obvious discomfort until I realized, rather belatedly, why Tom was starting to look just a tid bit sour. The higher the price rose, the more bidders had been weaned out until the only two contestants that were left to bargain for Tommy's assets were, to Tom's undulating horror and my own, his two very passionate, very possessive ex-girlfriends—Portia and my sister Sadie. Yikes!

"Ten thousand." The announcer screamed as Sadie brought up her hand in retaliation to Portia's bid.

"Fifteen thousand!" The auctioneer said again as Portia quirked a brow and raised her palm.

"Wow! Twenty-five thousand dollars! Going once, going twice…" The announcer quipped as I gripped the money painfully—fully aware of the bomb that was about to explode in the room as I held up my hand sheepishly.

"Fifty thousand!" I shouted hoarsely as my body suddenly went numb when the audience grew deadly silent. I squinted up at Tom with an expectant, worried look etched across my features as he smiled at me in encouragement. What was I doing? The announcer shrugged as no more bids surfaced before pointing at me merrily. Oh, if only she knew the pain this was causing.

"And the winner is…Jude Harrison!" She screamed loudly as I walked up to meet Tom on the stage. Now, seriously folks, I've heard those words before, just not quite in that context, and I felt suddenly afraid as I saw the anger flying off of Sadie and Spied as I gripped Tommy's hand like a lifeline. If only he knew what I had done for him.


	17. Chapter 17

God! I felt low—like a snake that slithers along its belly gracefully allowing its tongue to dart in and out like a poetic symphonic dance searching for prey. Even with the resumption of noise around us, I still felt like a witch being led to her death at the stake. Talk about an overactive imagination.

"Thank you." Tom whispered close to my ear as he led me to the back of the room, and I just nodded helplessly before leaning against the back wall in a state of shock. I had always dreamed of going on a date with Tommy—had literally replayed the same scene over and over again in my head until I had both sides of our conversation memorized. But now as I stood here I realized the truth of the matter. Dating for the two of us would never be easy. It would be like a small fire with the people surrounding us throwing kindling at us in order to watch the flames burn hotter and faster until everything was consumed.

I felt Tom's hand edge around my waist where he let it settle protectively as I looked back over the crowd watching almost in morbid fascination as the storm clouds brewed over Spiederman's face, and I shuddered. This was it for us. I could feel it. I had gone way too far this time. I felt Tom lean towards me, and I felt my body relax at his protective proximity.

"I didn't know you had already promised to purchase Spied when I asked you to do it, Jude." Tom said quietly as I kept staring forward toward the stage—shrugging my shoulders nonchalantly as his grip tightened.

"Why did you do it?" Tom asked almost in a whisper, and I knew without him even having to explain that he wanted to know why I had chosen to bid for him, ruining probably any chance that I ever had with Spied. And the only thing I could think of to say in reply were the three words he had thrown at me on my birthday that had literally turned my world both upside down and then right back up again that momentous day.

"You know why." I mumbled as he leaned back against the complex wall before exhaling softly.

"Yeah." He murmured as I smiled slightly at our moment of déjà vu. I was just about to make some witty, humorous remark to lighten the moment when he suddenly let his head roll to the side against the wall facing me.

"You're stunning tonight, Jude. I hope you know that when you walked into the room every man's blood pressure from the age of ten to the age of ninety hit the boiling point including mine." He said softly as I let my wide-eyed gaze meet his more casual one. There just wasn't anything I could say to that except 'well damn' and I wasn't going to ruin the moment that way. So I just smiled softly in thanks before turning away to peruse the room feeling my face burn with the heat of knowing I had turned him on.

The room rang with shouts as I looked up at the stage again, and to my utter amazement, I watched in silent amusement as Sadie bid suddenly on Liam and won. It's a good thing that dad had felt generous enough tonight to loan her money for the event.

"What the hell?" I said almost to myself as Tommy whistled under his breath before a voice behind us made us both laugh.

"Well, if it isn't a perfect match up between the 'got a boot stuck up my ass' executive and 'I'll keel over if I don't get my regular dose of lip gloss exposure' Barbie." Patsy said sarcastically as she sidled up beside us. I just shook my head at her and grinned.

"You were just afraid she'd bet on Jamie." I said in amusement as I watched her look at me snidely before shrugging. Tom snickered as we watched her squirm, and he handed her something from out of his pocket. Geez, the man must have withdrawn at least a hundred thousand dollars out of his account for this one night. It's a good thing he's well beyond millionaire status after his Boyz Attack days. Not to mention, producers don't do so bad themselves.

"Here 'dark woman of yore' go slay the dragons in this room and purchase your really twisted version of a prince. We all deserve a good night tonight." Tom said as Patsy looked up at him in disbelief. I felt my heart warm considerably as she pocketed the money with an ease that only came from the practice of finagling money out of people. I was duly impressed especially considering Tom had always had an 'I'm not sure about her' attitude towards Patsy since the tagging the building incident. Patsy grinned as Jamie's name was called.

"My thanks to you 'hunk of burnin love' producer." Patsy quipped as she stormed through the rest of the girls toward the stage—literally daring anyone to bid more than what she layed out on the table. And no surprise here—no one did. Dragging Jamie off the stage almost by the ear, I felt laughter well up inside me again as I let Tommy's fingers intertwine with mine. I just wasn't going to let regrets or fear ruin this night—this one last night pretending that Tommy and I could be more than just producer and artist. The rest of the pairings sped through the room rather quickly as we watched Wally and Kyle walk off with two beautiful blondes while Portia managed to snag Kwest and Spied joined up with a tall, gorgeous brunette. And I knew as he walked off the stage hand in hand with her that I didn't really and truly love him. I cared about him deeply, and it hurt to watch him flirt with another girl, but the painful pangs of jealousy that should have consumed me just didn't come. He looked at me then, and I saw the pain there—the anger that burned through his gaze and I wondered suddenly if tonight really would go all that smoothly.

"Let's go." Tommy remarked merrily as I realized rather belatedly that it was time to head over to the restaurant. I nodded quickly before letting him lead me out toward an empty limousine—feeling anticipation wash over me as he opened the door and motioned for me to enter first. Maybe I couldn't have my 'please commit to me forever prince charming' right now, but I did have this one night and I was going to make the most of it.

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**Author's footnote: You guys are freakin' amazing! When I turned on my computer this morning, I practically felt myself melt at the reviews. I'm so excited now at where I'm taking the story that even my toes tingle. I only wrote this one chapter last night, but with the amazing feed back, I can't help but want to burn the keyboard with my fingers today so as much as my work allows, I plan to post as much as possible so that I don't leave you hanging too long. Please keep reviewing. Your thoughts on my take help me so much on deciding how I should manage the twists and turns. Smiles to you all! R&R. Angel.**


	18. Chapter 18

I sat back in the limo considering Tom in the dark uneasily only because the two of us and dark cavernous places always seemed to equal some form of combustible energy. I mean it was just a date, right? And did dates funded by the studio actually count?

'_Well, duh, you idiot!'_ I thought to myself as I mentally slapped myself on the forehead. Considering the fact that he had literally handed over fifty thousand dollars for this one particular date, then I could officially consider this a Jude/Tommy moment. I mean, geez, the hole burning itself into Tom's pocket pretty much reserved his right to a free meal.

Tom chucked softly as I began fiddling with the buttons on the sunroof above our heads.

"I've always wanted to ride down the road in one of these things with my head sticking out the top shouting God knows what to the general public." I said in amusement as I started to stand up slightly only to feel Tom's fingers wrap around my wrist.

"You may want to wait until the ride home then, Harrison. I'm not too sure your hairstylist would appreciate the effect wind has on styling products." Tommy said with a wry twinkle in his eye. I slapped at his arm playfully before winking.

"You're no fun, Quincy. Better yet, wouldn't it be great if we got stuck in a traffic jam?" I asked as he lifted his brow in confusion. I just shrugged.

"You can't tell me you haven't seen all those movies made in Hollywood where the stars have to climb out of a sunroof and jump their way over a dozen metal hoods to get to whatever insane destination the screenwriter has chosen for them." I said with a laugh as Tom quirked a brow and sat back heavily against the leather seats.

"I'd just like to see you try that in a skirt, Harrison." He said with a knowing look as I settled into the seat beside him, letting my head rest comfortably against his. I looked down thoughtfully at our hands before taking a deep breath, gathering up my courage like a blanket around me, and then picking up his hand with mine in order to intertwine our fingers like a rope.

"What are we doing here, Tom?" I asked almost in a whisper as I let my head lift up enough so that our noses were almost touching and my eyes were connected directly with his. A thrill shot through my spine as I felt his breath fan across my face as he sighed and pulled me even closer to him, edging his one free hand around me until it settled leisurely on the back of my head.

"You tell me, Jude. Because I'm sure as hell one lost man." He said just as softly as I smiled to lighten the moment.

"And you know how men are about asking directions?" I asked with a small laugh as his eyes dropped to my lips. My breathing hitched as he ran a finger over the soft flesh gently.

"I don't know, Jude. This time I think I'd rather not know the way." He said huskily before his lips fell suddenly onto mine, and I instantly found myself drowning in an insistent, passionate kiss that bespoke of desperation, confusion, and even fear. What were we doing? Damned if I cared to know the answer to that question at the moment. The whole world could have spiraled out of orbit, and I sure as hell wouldn't have noticed.


	19. Chapter 19

A sudden lurch caused us to spring apart as I looked breathlessly out the limo windows at the brilliant lights of the 'The Golden Medallion' outside. I couldn't help but blink at the obnoxious brightness, almost wishing that the world would fade into some weird twilight zone dimension where the only thing that existed was Tom and I, but, alas, my prince sighed and opened the car door ceremoniously to reveal us both to the wonderful and cruel world of reality. Let's just hope this whole adventure didn't turn into a pumpkin at midnight because I sure as hell didn't have any glass slippers to leave behind. Besides, I had no intention of running.

Kwest and Portia met us at the door as we walked over to the entrance slowly, and I looked around cautiously as Portia leaned in close.

"He already went in with his date, Jude." Portia remarked almost sarcastically as I looked into the dining room. Tom must have noticed my hesitation because he squeezed me gently on the shoulder before brushing past me into the joint.

"Why don't I go find where they have us, and you can join me in a sec." Tom said casually as Portia raised a brow and looked up at Kwest.

"Now would be a good time for me to go find Sadie and escape to the powder room." Portia said with a slight edge to her voice as she stomped into the dining area looking for my sister. Kwest just sighed.

"I hope you know what you're doing, Jude." He said carefully as I looked up at him warily. What was it with these people?

"Why can't everyone just let this go?" I said haltingly—finally letting the small crack to my voice reveal itself—knowing that as I did, I was letting Tom's own best friend see through to my torment. Kwest placed his hands on my shoulders before turning me to face him.

"It's not you and Tom, per say. It's you and the ramifications that are involved with getting to know Tommy Quincy—the man and not the Boyz Attack legend. There are things about him, Jude that…well that he doesn't share, and I just don't want you to walk into this whole complex unity blind-sided." Kwest stated cryptically as I felt a shiver steer itself down my spine in trepidation.

"What aren't you telling me, Kwest?" I asked quietly as I saw Tom approaching us from across the room. Kwest glanced over his shoulder in his direction as well before rubbing the back of his neck with his hand.

"I know you hate the whole age difference analogy, Jude, but the truth is Tom has been through a whole lot of shit you can't even begin to imagine. It has hardened him into the emotional knot you see before you today. If you're that determined, then I promise you'll end up finding it out on your own." He said before turning toward Tom as he stepped up to us with a grin.

"Go have fun you two." He said with a small laugh as Tom looked at Kwest suspiciously before taking my arm and walking across the room with me. Kwest was right. I knew that. I mean, damn, part of my attraction to Tom was that whole mysterious aura that seemed to waver around his persona. Looking at the candle-lit table that he stopped at before pulling out my chair, I pushed the worries out of my head. At this point, I didn't care about anything but this moment. I was freakin' tired of worrying about repercussions. I just wanted passion and, looking steadily at Tom as he smiled before taking his seat, I started to realize that I might even want something more.


	20. Chapter 20

**Author's note: Once again, you guys really do me proud. I am so glad that someone is interested in my story. It has really grown on me. Okay guys, are you ready for some major drama? Things are really about to explode. I hope you guys bear with me to watch where the falling debris lands because, all in all, I think you'll enjoy where the story goes. It has defnitely taken on a mind of its own (laugh out loud). And don't worry, my computer and email is finally, and I mean finally working properly after I had someone come fix it so now I can read some of your stories and review too. Lots of smiles. Please Please R&R.**

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The tinkling sound of silverware and glass barely even registered in my mind as I perused the menu before looking over at Tom with a quirked eyebrow.

"Escargot?" I asked with a faint wrinkle of my nose at the thought as Tom chuckled. I just played haphazardly with the silverware in front of me as he laughed—wondering how the hell so many forks and spoons could be used for just one simple activity. Placing his hand over the front of my menu, Tom eased it down slowly as I looked up into his face.

"Not to keen on the idea of eating salted slugs, huh?" He asked as he pointed to another item on the list before grinning.

"Just don't think about ordering the lobster." He remarked wryly as I looked up at him warily.

"And what do you have against lobster, Tom Quincy, and don't tell me it's the price because that's covered." I said with a grin as Tom perused me gently.

"Let's just say I have seen that movie Pretty Woman, and it doesn't take a whole lot of stretch of the imagination seeing you trying to crack open a claw only to have it fly down some other woman's dress." Tom said with a wink as I cracked up. Oh, what a jolly idea.

"You just made me very interested in seafood." I said with a mischievous glint in my eye. Tom groaned. I had missed the banter between the two of us, and I looked up into his face seriously as I watched his own expression darken as he seemed to realize the same thing. The waitress walked up then, and he quirked a brow humorously as he ordered a steak while I, true to form, ordered the lobster just for the hell of it. The lady walked off as I looked down at the napkin I had placed in my lap. Mom had, despite her aversion to thinking so, taught me some manners before she disappeared.

"What were you and Kwest so enthralled in earlier?" He asked suddenly and I looked up to find Tom fiddling absent-mindedly with the stem of his champagne glass. I just shook my head.

"It's just the same routine, Tom. Everyone telling me the pros and the cons of why I should or shouldn't let myself get too close to you." I answered vaguely as I saw him visibly draw back into himself as raucous laughter from the adjoining table broke through our reverie.

"That's what they make vixens for." Spied remarked—his voice a little slurred, and I realized grimly that he must have imbibed a little too much in the alcohol list at the back of the menu. A year older than I at eighteen, he could afford to I suppose. Tom and I glanced up at each other poignantly as Spied laughed again at something the girl with him had said.

"I guess that's what back-stabbing, two-timing sluts are for too." He said just as loudly and I suddenly felt my body go cold as I looked over my shoulder in Spied's general direction. He looked up too at that moment and I saw his face fall as his gaze met my incredibly wounded one. I think he realized then that he had cut me a little too deeply because I saw the apologetic 'I don't know what I was thinking look' creep over his features as Tom's chair scooted back abrasively against the floor in front of me. I quickly leaned over and grabbed his arm with my hand.

"Don't, Tom. I don't think he's thinking clearly enough to realize what he's saying. I really hurt him tonight." I remarked sadly as Tom nodded sullenly before pushing his chair back in under the tablecloth. The food came then, and we concentrated more on eating than talking, and I even managed not to lose a lobster claw even though Tom winced every time I cracked into one. I just laughed at him.

"Now I know what to do to make you nervous, Quincy." I said with a small chuckle as Tom shrugged.

"Honey, you've been a nervous wreck for the entire studio since we signed on your 'I'll do it my own way' little ass, and I wouldn't change it for the world." He said with a grin as I looked up at him winningly.

"It's all that Harrison charm shining through." I said with a grin as Tom cocked his brow.

"More like stubbornness, but hey that's a trait keen in this business." He said with a subtle edge to his voice as I saw him look over at the dance floor. Most of the couples from the auction had managed to meander over to it, and I recognized Jamie and Patsy, Kwest and Portia, and SME and their girls whirling around the room seemingly enjoying themselves. I pointed laughingly at Sadie and Liam who seemed to be debating the fine merits of the ballroom dance floor as Tom grinned too before standing up and offering me his hand.

"Care to try?" He asked causally as I shrugged my shoulders before placing my hand in his and letting him pull me up gracefully. There are quite a few good things that could be said for fancy restaurants and their small dance floors—it forces people to get close. And I craved that closeness with Tommy more than I did fine wine or sparkling chandeliers. Tom pulled me into him as we danced, and I laid my cheek against the top of his slightly unbuttoned shirt—listening to his heart beat slowly as I danced in rhythm with it's soft melody. Neither of us spoke at first. It would have ruined the magic I think, but I finally looked up into his eyes imploringly as we moved.

"You know this is almost the most we have touched for this long a period of time since we met?" I asked with an incredulous glint in my eyes as he grinned.

"I guess it is." He said softly as I let my head fall again—just enjoying the moment until the world stopped again, and my screwed up life interfered. It's like holding a piece of fine china in your hand and watching in horror as you lose your grip on the object. You know inevitably that it's going to crash to the floor and shatter but you try your best to ignore the numbness it creates as you watch it fall in slow motion.

"I don't guess I could cut in?" A voice asked cynically as I looked over my shoulder in trepidation. Tom looked as if he was about to say something, but I held up my hand and shook my head. Maybe it was time Spied and I talked. Tom just nodded quickly before taking Spied's date and continuing the dance. I looked up at Spied warily.

"I'm sorry about tonight, Spied." I said sincerely as he pulled me to him and we began to dance. He just frowned at an invisible spot above my shoulder.

"I don't guess I have to ask why, huh Jude?" He said with a despairing wilt to his voice as I shook my head firmly. He just sighed.

"I guess I've always known. I just wanted to see if I could make you forget him. Why is he that hard to just walk away from?" Spied asked as I choked on a tear that was working itself up into my throat.

"Let's not analyze it, Spied." I said with a small sob as he looked down at me angrily. He was allowed to be hurt.

"I won't let this ruin the band or our music, Jude." He said suddenly as I looked up at him with a thankful smile until I saw the way he was staring across the room at Tom.

"But I am going to have to ask you to forgive me for this one thing." Spied said with finality before setting me aside and stomping toward Tom. I stared in horror as he suddenly lifted his fist and plowed it into Tom's face as hard as he could.

"Spied, no!" I yelled as Tom looked up at him stunned before narrowing his eyes. I knew Tom's strength, and I also knew he knew how to control it, but I didn't want to see them fight like this. Tom shoved Spied against a table before grabbing him by the collar of his shirt.

"I can understand your anger man, but now would _not_ be a good time to provoke me." Tom said with a growl as Spied winced before shoving Tom against the chest. Tom didn't even stumble as he backed away and held up his hands in a gesture that said 'I'm finished here." But Spied didn't seem to get the memo because he picked up a bottle of wine and threw it. Tom ducked and I watched in equal parts horror and fascination as the object flew through the air only to come into contact with one of the restaurant's finest chandeliers shattering it into a million little pieces as patrons of the place screamed and backed to the edge of the room. I could hear Darius roaring as sirens sounded in the distance. And I knew somehow, with a weary heaviness in my heart, that things were about to explode at G Majors studio. Dear God! What else could go wrong?


	21. Chapter 21

I applied a small ice pack to the side of Tommy's face as Darius paced back and forth in front of everyone in the empty entrance of the studio. The cops had come and Darius had settled up the entire cost of damages as well as bail for Tom and Spied before dragging the entire group out of the restaurant and into waiting cars.

"You just couldn't wait until a more appropriate time, could you?" Darius asked Spied bitingly as Spied shrugged and looked away hurriedly. Darius threw his hands up into the air in exasperation.

"Well that's just great because now we have managed to ruin a perfectly good charity event, and we've managed to cancel the televised fight between the two of you. I mean, what's the point now, huh? Everyone and their mothers are going to be seeing it on the freakin' local news tonight. Do you even realize the ramifications of this?" Darius asked as everyone just stared at him silently. Darius sighed before glancing at Tom.

"Maybe it's a good idea if you take a vacation for a little while, Quincy. Just until I can clean this mess up." Dariusstated matter-of-factly as I jerked my head up in astonishment.

"You can't be serious, Darius!" I began as Darius held up his hand in a gesture of warning.

"I would not finish that statement if I were you, Jude Harrison." He said rather pointedly as I felt Tom shove the ice pack away from his face forcefully. I could tell he was angry—maybe at himself or just at the situation, I'd never know.

"Why don't I just start my little hiatus now?" He asked with a furious shrug as Darius just looked at him quietly, and I almost screamed in frustration as Tom nodded his head before shoving his way out of the room. No! I glanced at everyone only briefly before following him as fast as I could.

"Tommy wait!" I cried as we both burst into the balmy night air as he marched steadfastly to his viper. He glanced at me only a second, and I felt my heart break at the glint in his eye.

"I need to get away for a while, Jude, and right now, I don't know if I'm coming back." He said pointedly as I cried and shoved my fist against the hood of his car as he jumped in and revved up his engine.

"Tom No!" I shouted again as he shoved the gear into drive and pressed the gas peddle--streaming gravel as he tore into the street.

"Tom!" I yelled as I watched hopelessly and helplessly at his fading taillights in the distance.


	22. Chapter 22

_**Tommy driving to an unknown destination…**_

Tommy hit his steering wheel forcefully with the end of his balled up fist as he cursed the fates and yelled loudly at the night. What was happening here? And why the hell did he care? Tom was not a retrospective man—his emotions had been hardened, had been rolled into a brick wall that he had set up around his heart like a cage. And yet, she had come and managed to knock loose the mortar. The road ahead wavered as the lights from his car shone over the hot cement in dizzying speed—disorienting the moment, fragmenting the night the same way his thoughts were at the present second. And then the rain started—dripping slowly at first like a single teardrop rolling down a raised cheekbone, and then pounding down in fury as Tom lifted his roof up and turned on his windshield wipers. '_It certainly matches my mood,' _Tom thought sourly as he drove almost aimlessly in a direction that would confuse most. It was pointless trying to think right now when his emotions were so on edge.

The rain began to pummel down so hard that his vision out the front of his window was affected, and he pulled over to the side of the road—resting his forehead against the steering wheel in a gesture of defeat. How had it happened? How had he let her get that close to him? She was like a parasite that had overtaken his body, and the only thing that seemed to ease his pain was her nearness. It was literally driving him mad. She was a child for God's sake! Or was he just telling himself that in order to guard what little dignity he had left. Shit! It didn't matter anyway. Who was he to make any promises to her, any commitments whatsoever when he wasn't even free to do so. No, the blackness that dominated his soul came from a different source altogether and it irked him.

Sitting there in the rain staring out at the black abyss that surrounded his car, Tom came to a decision and, with firm resolve, he shifted his gear back into drive before barreling out into the night.

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_**Jude at the studio...**_

I couldn't do anything but stare at the blackness outside in the direction that he had gone as tears streamed down my face in rivulets while I stood there frozen like some mythical, ancient statue marbleized in time.

"Jude?" I heard someone whisper from behind me and still I didn't turn, didn't move as a hand worked its way cautiously onto my shoulder and, almost as if that hand were a stick breaking through a piñata, the flood gates exploded and I turned hurriedly into Jamie's arms where I sobbed uncontrollably. He rubbed what hair had fallen out of the clip down my back, and I hiccupped in misery as he whispered, 'shhhhhh.' Nothing soothed me.

"He'll come back, Jude." Jamie said earnestly while I just let my shoulders slump miserably as a drop of rain suddenly hit the side of my cheek and, even in my beautiful red dress, I didn't care. The water felt good as it's cold moistness dampened my body—cleansing it of impurities. I suddenly realized that I could ace my English exam on Romeo and Juliet because I _felt _like the tragic heroine of yore—I understood the animosity, the barriers of class and social stigma that must have faced Shakespeare's characters and then another of Shakespeare's lines began to roll through my head as I looked up into the rain soaked sky in sudden resolve—"To thine own self be true." Who knew that Tom was thinking the same thing at that very moment. I just knew that I had to let him walk away in order for him to make the decision to come back.

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**Author's note: Jude and Tommy are headed for a crossroads. What secrets does Tommy' s past reveal. How will Jude deal with the truth. What happens when shocking moments opens Jude's eyes up to exciting possibilities? And will Spied and Tommy become partners in an endeavor? Wow! Who would have thought? R&R guys and let me know you're still there. And hold onto your seats, we're in for a bumpy ride. Smiles toall of you reading. Please R&R. Angel.**


	23. Chapter 23

The next few days were like a blur to me. I vaguely remembered working a little on my album as the guys tried to prod me into doing something other than sulk, and it wasn't that I was pouting exactly. I just found it hard to concentrate when everything in me screamed that something was wrong. I was in the studio fiddling with my guitar and writing in my notebook—and then repeating the method all over again until a strange sort of litany was finally beginning to form on the page—when a loud clearing of the throat caused me to look up in expectation before I sighed and then looked down again.

"Tom called me." Kwest said suddenly causing my heart to lurch painfully in my chest.

"And?" I asked quietly as I kept my head down, hoping to hide the hope that I knew shone through my eyes like radar. Kwest sighed.

"He's coming home, Jude, but he's got a lot to deal with right now." Kwest said almost wearily as I finally looked over at him to find him rubbing the back of his neck with his hand.

"You do that a lot when you're stressed, don't you?" I asked lightly as I let myself grin at him slowly. It wasn't his fault that he was one of the few people that really knew how Tom and I felt about each other, even though I'm pretty sure everyone else highly suspected that something was going on. He smiled back at me as he took a seat to my right.

"What are you doing there?" He asked magnanimously as I handed over my notebook. He looked at it a moment before whistling.

"That's powerful stuff, Jude." He said with a shake of his head as I chuckled softly.

"I hope so. Powerful stuff usually creates powerful hits." I remarked matter-of-factly as Kwest tapped one of the pages with my pencil.

"Point taken." He said with a wry cock of his brow as I looked over into the empty mixing room with a sigh. I could see myself reflected in the glass, and I was actually pretty saddened by the sight.

"What are two hiding, Kwest?" I asked so suddenly that Kwest seemed to have found himself at a loss for words. He just stuttered a moment instead until I turned to face him—peering into his face with a determination that could tame a mountain lion. Kwest sighed.

"Jude, I can't tell you. But do me a favor will you? Don't discount him…please don't let it get between you two because your friendship is pretty powerful damn stuff, and he needs that right now. I'll just say this for him. This problem of his is not his fault. Fame can do horrible things to a man, and it practically imprisoned him. It even gave him a jailer." Kwest said passionately as I just stared at him both confused and a little afraid. Why did he have to be so ambiguous? I opened my mouth to say something else when Kwest shook his head and walked over to the door.

"Don't, Jude." He said before turning the knob and walking out—leaving me staring at the back of a wooden abyss.

* * *

**_Tom at an undisclosed location…_**

"Just sign the papers, Justine." Tom said irately as the beautiful, tall woman he was speaking with flew around her home in agitation. She smiled at him wickedly.

"Why the sudden burning desire to take care of it now, Thomas?" Justine remarked hatefully as Tom sighed in despair.

"Just sign the damn papers!" he yelled again as he threw them at her feet watching as they floated down around her like a maddening snowstorm of fury. Justine just sat down prettily.

"It's a girl, isn't it?" She asked while clapping gleefully.

"Oh, how very darling! Tom Quincy finally falls for someone he can never have. Tell me, is she pretty?" Justine asked curiously as Tom threw her a murderous glance.

"Leave her the hell out of it, Justine. This has nothing to do with anything but you and I. Now sign the papers." He repeated through clenched teeth as she picked up the strewn documents gingerly before pretending to peruse them carefully.

"I don't know, Thomas. I need some time to think about it." Justine said prettily as Tom growled in frustration.

"You've had four years, Justine, and you know where to mail them." Tom said forcefully as he shoved his way out of her house out to his car. She followed slowly, lifting one pretty shoulder slyly.

"Leaving so soon?" She asked with a pout as Tommy pulled his car door open before throwing her a pointed glance.

"Once again, you know where to mail them." He said with derision as he backed out of the drive, heading toward the one place he knew he could find peace as she stared mischievously after him.


	24. Chapter 24

_**A Day Later...**_

_My rainbow at the end of the storm_

_My triumph at the end of the day_

_My path strays from the offered norm_

_And still I look to him to guide my way_

I sang softly the next day—trying to fine tune the melody as Kwest tweaked with the soundboard in the other room, and I smiled at him as he gave me a thumbs up sign. The lyrics seemed to please him. He crossed his eyes as I stuck out my tongue at him, and I couldn't help but snicker as I plucked at the strings of my guitar. He could seriously be a real ham when he wanted to be. I was just about to start singing another bar when Kwest's face suddenly froze in an expression of awe, and I looked over my shoulder to see Tommy leaning against the studio door casually. My heart plummeted to my toes.

"Let's take five, Jude." Kwest said firmly from the other room as I nodded mutely while still staring at Tom. Neither one of us said anything as I finally managed to find my voice enough to squeak.

"And the prodigal son returns." I remarked hoarsely as Tommy winced at the hurt he heard in my tone. I knew that was harsh but I couldn't find it in me to just jump up and run to him with open arms.

"I guess I deserve that." Tommy said knowingly as he slunk into the room, slowly circling me cautiously—almost afraid that if he came too close then I would explode.

"You guess?" I asked sarcastically as Tommy shrugged.

"I know I deserved it, Jude. I just need you to pretend things haven't been strange around here lately, okay." Tom said as I grimaced at his statement. He was kidding me right? I mean he wasn't just asking me to forget the last four days, was he?

"Why have you been hiding out, Tom?" I asked forcefully as he ran his fingers through his hair haphazardly before beginning to pace the room.

"Because I have things I need to work through—dragons I need to slay." He said in a low tone as I stared at him a moment in hesitation. He reached out to touch me, but I drew back quickly almost pushing over the stool I was sitting on as I stood up. The hurt that shot through his eyes as I backed away from himripped through me, but I was hurting too. It had only been a week since he left, but the point was that he **_had_** walked away—leaving me to pick up the pieces at the studio.

"Where's my Hercules, Tom—the man that would have accomplished amazing feats just to overcome any obstacles stopping him from getting what he wants?" I asked softly as Tom looked up at me with a pained expression.

"Where's the girl that trusted me once?" Tom asked just as softly as I walked up to him as every step I took felt heavier and heavier as if my feet didn't want to listen to the rest of my body. As I neared him, I leaned over until our cheeks almost touched.

"She became a woman who lost her trust in the one person she thought _never_ would walk away." I said as my voiced quivered pitifully. I could hear his breathing catch as he moved over enough our shoulders rubbed together, almost as if the sudden contact gave him strength. I looked up into his eyes mournfully.

"Where did you go, Tom?" I asked uneasily as I saw his pupils dilate as if he were not even paying attention to me—as if he had become absorbed in his own thoughts.

"You don't know what you're asking, Jude. Just trust me, please. Give me time." He pleaded despairingly as a sudden commotion outside the studio door caused us to turn toward the entrance in startled unison. The door slammed open, and I could see the entire staff of the studio looking in on us in amazement as a beautiful, willowy woman stood in the opening with her hands planted firmly on her hips almost as if she were an Amazon warrior woman who had stepped right out of the history books. I saw Tom close his eyes and count slowly to three in a gesture I had seen him use a million times before when he was trying desperately not to lose his cool.

"You're awful quiet, Tom. Something tells me you're not over-joyed to see me." The woman said with a menacing laugh as I looked between her and Tom curiously.

"What's going on here?" I asked in a whisper as I felt Tom's hand inconspicuously squeeze mine forcefully almost as if he were begging me to trust him silently as he faced the woman with a look of pure disgust. I stared at him a moment as the silence grew to a point that it had just become plain uncomfortable.

"Who are you?" I asked the woman quietly even though I kept my eyes focused on Tommy's face as I did. She snickered as she leaned casually against the door jam—watching Tommy with a predatory gleam in her eye.

"I guess every one missed the memo, Thomas." She said bitterly before turning her cold eyes toward me.

"I'm his wife." She said matter-of-factly as a collective gasp vibrated throughout the room. Tom watched as my expression fell—crumbling in on itself like a flimsy house made out of cards. Holy Jesus, Mary, and Jehosaphat!


	25. Chapter 25

I couldn't even speak as I stared at the two of them. What did she mean—his wife? He couldn't be married! For God's sake, he had dated Sadie! How could he possibly be married? Ugghhhhh…I shook my head at the bombarding questions trying to clear my sudden blurred vision as Tommy's face grew dark with anger and regret.

"Wife?" I whispered on a choking sob as I looked into Tommy's—no excuse me, Thomas's eyes looking for any sort of sign that it was all a lie, but when he only nodded sullenly, I felt my whole world crash like a porcelain vase around my feet. Oh my God!

"She is cute, Tom." The woman stated merrily from behind us as she perused me critically, "But a little on the young side, don't you think?" She replied again as I refused to turn around and look at her. Kwest's words kept ringing through my head as I watched Tom glare at the woman over my shoulder _"It wasn't his fault." _I heard again through my head as I tried to categorize the situation as well as I could in my mind. _"Don't over-react, Jude!" _I kept telling myself as I heard the woman laugh behind me.

"Oh, I'm sorry. Did I come at a bad time?" She asked sheepishly as Tommy pointed at the studio behind her. I still didn't look anywhere but at him as his eyes narrowed menacingly.

"Get out, Justine!" He shouted as everyone in the studio behind us watched in fascination. I couldn't help but close my eyes and pinch myself as I heard the girl sigh sourly before slamming the door shut with a huff. I felt Tom leaning over in front of me as I stared resolutely at the back of my eyelids.

"Look at me, Jude!" He commanded desperately as I opened my eyes to find him staring at me intently almost as if a look alone could convince me he was sorry about what had happened. I just couldn't say anything.

"I was nineteen years old. It happened a year after Portia and I divorced, Jude." He said heavily as if that would make everything more clear for me. I just laughed mockingly.

"Wow, Tom! Two wives under your belt. How many do you have to have before you start to feel like a real man?" I asked sardonically as he grabbed me by the flesh of my arms firmly—shaking me gently as he did.

"I was drugged, Jude. She was a friend of mine—a supermodel making waves in the business. I was a huge star at the time, and she finagled my phone number out of her agent. I was pretty selective about the women I dated back then, Jude—no depth to them, only good looks. She was a huge fan, and I enjoyed having her to show off after our performances. Soon, we were an item. And then when I grew tired of her—because I always did with the women I dated back then—I dumped her, and she retaliated. She got me drunk one night and slipped just enough of a tranquilizer into my drink that I was pretty conducive to whatever scheme she came up with. The next thing I knew, I woke up one morning married to her. Of course, I went to draw up annulment papers immediately stating irreconcilable differences, but she threw a fit and went to the court with a sob story about my treatment of her. All it took was her sleeping with the judge and I was stuck paying alimony to her under the condition that we could be legally separated. She's not crazy, Jude. All she wanted was money, and through me, she saw a way to get it. I've been trying for years to push for divorce instead." He explained miserably as I looked up into his face in astonishment. My God! What was this—Days of Our Lives? I just stared at him as he looked up at me with a pleading expression.

"I don't love her, Jude. I never have. Damn it all to hell!" He shouted as he pushed me against the wall, pressing his lips to mine in an explosion of furious passion, and I moaned as I tried my best not to respond, but despite it all, I still found I cared for him more than I should. I reveled in the feel of his arms wrapped around me, the fierce possessiveness that he poured into the kiss, but a nagging little voice in my head brought me back to reality as everything finally processed in my mind, and I pushed against him just enough that he pulled back to look into my face.

"Oh my God, you're married!" I whispered as the shock crumbled into something more tangible. Tom let his head drop toward the floor as he pushed away from the wall.

"On paper, Jude…Just on paper." He said as he brought his hand up to cover his heart. "Now here.." He said as he tapped his chest. "Is a different story." He finished as he leaned against the wall opposite me. This was just so so very wrong. Shit! What were we going to do? I couldn't look at him as I marched across the room to stand staring directly at his chest, but I ran my fingers up his arms anyway before placing my hand where he had put his over his heart earlier.

"Then I guess I can still hope that you are saving this part of yourself for someone else?" I asked quietly as Tom sighed heavily before placing his hand over mine and squeezing gently.

"I'm starting to think I've already given it away." He murmured as a sound at the door caused me to back away with a small sob.

"I think I should go home and call it a day." I said wearily as I nodded at him with a soft smile before dashing out the studio door, ignoring the pointed stares and horrific laughter of Tom's horrible horrible wife as I made my way toward the parking lot and home—my sanctuary. Oh, if only I knew how much I was about to learn that sanctuaries are people instead of places.


	26. Chapter 26

The house was dark when I got there, and I ran into the place blindly looking for any place to hide as long as I didn't have to face what had happened tonight.

"Jude, are you alright?" Dad asked suddenly as he materialized out of the dim living room—grabbing me by the shoulders as my body shook with sobs. I just shook my head as I let him pull me into him—resting my cheek against his chest like I had when I was a little girl—reveling in the fatherly protection I still felt even now. He didn't ask me what was wrong. He just held me until I cried myself to sleep, and I vaguely felt him carry me up the stairs to my room and lay me gently onto my bed before shutting my bedroom door with a click.

I awoke a few hours later confused and suddenly on alert. An odor permeated the house, and I sat up in alarm as I realized it was smoke. What the hell? I dropped quickly to the floor, ran over to my door, and pulled the entrance open in horror as I realized the house was on fire. Running down the stairs I yelled for dad and Sadie in terror as I noticed a small candle laying on it's side on the living room table. That must have been what had started it. When nobody answered, I ran outside assuming that dad and Sadie had escaped into the yard.

I looked around the dark night in despair—desperately seeking the two faces that would cause my heart to slow its beat considerably despite the horror behind me. There was nothing—no familiar visages standing outside on the grass and I turned on my heels and ran like a mad woman back into the steaming house both in fear and determination.

"Dad…Sadie!" I yelled as I ran—entering each room one at a time while coughing around the billowing smoke. My eyes watered, and I could feel the moisture bead up along my cheeks as I rubbed at the condensation pointlessly. Where were they?

"Dad…Sadie!" I yelled again and again as I marched up the stairs grabbing at the warm banister as I went, stumbling here and there as I weaved in and out of the rooms positioned on the upper floors. Empty. They were empty. I felt my shoulders slump in relief as I turned to run back down the stairs—screaming in horror as I watched the staircase crumble to the ground as the fire crackled and burned around me, and I cried tears of soot as I wondered if this was it for me—was I going to die in here?

* * *

Tom slammed his car door forcefully—looking at the Harrison home in horror as the flames spread like a phantom epidemic, eating up each piece of timber as if it were nothing more than an easy snack. What the hell was going on? Where was Jude? Tom ran into the yard frantically tearing through the hedges that lined its side until he saw Stuart gasping on the manicured lawn.

"Where's Jude?" Tom asked desperately as Stuart's eyes widened in alarm.

"I thought she was already out here. Her bed was empty." Stuart cried mournfully as Tom looked around and spotted Sadie before dashing toward the house. There was no way he was losing Jude now!

* * *

My body wracked with coughs as I fell to my knees in despair, standing up suddenly as I thought I heard someone yelling myname from down below. I heard it again, and I knew without even looking that it was Tom. 

"Jude?" I heard him scream again, and I almost cried as my body sagged in relief.

"I'm here!" I yelled forcefully as I looked over the remaining balcony to the inflamed wood and tile that made up the ground floor beneath. Vaguely, I saw him shoving through the debris—appearing almost like a mystical phoenix out of legend immune to fire. He looked up at me in relief as he perused the situation grimly. There was no way I could get down there to him. He seemed to come to some kind of firm realization as he looked up at me with wide eyes.

"You're going to have to jump, Jude." He said matter-of-factly as I shook my head vehemently.

"I'm not doing it, Tom!" I shouted desperately as I backed away from the edge of the balcony. I had never been very fond of heights.

"You're going to have to, Jude. I'll catch you okay. Just trust me, damn it! Please!" He cried above the crackling of the flames and I looked back at my burning bedroom before glancing once more down at Tom's frightened face. The look in his eyes seemed to make up my mind for me as I closed my eyes and counted to three before stepping over to the edge of the balcony and leaping. Hot air whirled around me as I fell, and I almost sobbed in relief as I felt Tom's arms wrap around me as he cushioned my fall. Pushing himself off of the floor where he had stumbled, he pulled me desperately toward the entrance of the house—half carrying me as my lungs struggled for fresh air, and my head started spinning dizzily.

"I'm going to get you out of here!" He shouted reassuringly as cool air suddenly brushed my cheeks, and I smiled up at him gratefully as my lungs just decided to quit, and I fell into his arms limply. A paramedic rushed up towards us, and I gasped in welcome air as he wrapped an oxygen mask around my face before turning to look back in dismay at my burning house—my childhood home.


	27. Chapter 27

_**Author's note: Oh Wow you guys are so great! I was so afraid of where this chapter went. I was just sitting in front of my computer and the next thing I knew Jude's house was on fire. So damn shocking even to me. EEEK! I am just so excited about where this story is going. I quit writing it after the first chapter. After that, the keyboard just moves as I type but the story pretty much writes itself. You guys are tuly wonderful. I open my email and my login page and I can't help but smile. Thank youSO much for taking the time to let me know what you think. You guys are terrific. Hope you enjoy what comes next. Please R&R. Smiles.**_

_**

* * *

**_Nothing prepares you for something like this. There are no lessons on grief 101 given to students at school—it's just a plain reality that digs itself into your skin like a razor blade poised over your wrist. And it cuts deeply too because the only thing left in you when the adrenaline fades is pain. 

Somewhere in the dim, mysterious world of illusion caused by the smoke that came off the house, I heard Sadie and dad yelling for me—running through the grass with it's fog machine-like tendrils of mist wrapping around their legs—clinging to them before dissipating into the night before they finally approached me, dropping to their knees to pull me into a fierce embrace. I coughed as the paramedic took away the mask before glancing as best I could through the crowd that had gathered at the side of the yard. Somewhere in all of the chaos, I had lost Tommy and I searched frantically for him as dad brushed away some of the soot from my face carefully.

"Oh God! I'm glad you're okay." Dad said passionately as I smiled and nodded at him vaguely, feeling a dead weight settle over my chest as my search through the familiar neighborhood faces came up empty for the one person that I had hoped desperately to find. Where was he?

And then I saw him—those blue eyes shining like a beacon near the edge of an ambulance, complaining (that's my Tommy) with a paramedic that he was fine before glancing up at me and catching my gaze. I smiled softly at him begging him with my eyes not to leave. He must have understood because he nodded to me slowly before turning back to the man in front of him. I sighed heavily as the pain in my chest began to fade a little. I felt like I had run a marathon—leaping in bounds over hurdles that kept getting bigger and bigger as I approached them. I had to keep telling myself over and over in my head that 'this was not a soap opera. This was my life,' as I looked over the burning debris in a mixture of sorrow and grief. Could it have been coincidence that the house had burned down the same afternoon that I discovered Tommy was married? And as soon as that question hit me, I just had to know right then—as if waiting would cause everything in me to fall apart. I looked up at dad mournfully.

"How did it start, dad? Do they know how it started?" I asked with a shiver as the wind suddenly blew under the hem of my charred shirt. Dad rubbed his eyes wearily before pulling me down again against his chest—hugging me as if he were afraid I would disappear on him.

"It was an accident, Jude. They thought it was a candle at first in the living room but I knew I had blown that out before I went to bed so they investigated the kitchen while you were being treated for smoke inhalation. The debris is still too hot to know for sure, but they found a short in one of your mom's old toasters. I had been telling her for years that it was a fire hazard, but she just shook it off. At least she seemed to have gotten what she wanted—freedom." He said as he looked over at the charred remains sorrowfully. I knew that his bitterness towards mom right now had him believing that she would be happy the property was finally gone, but I don't think even she was running away from her past so much so that she wanted it to disappear completely because that's just what it had done. Everything was gone.

So it had been an accident—a careless mistake that had probably been a time bomb waiting to happen for years but that had decided to go off on the same night I had felt my whole world crumble. But that's how life works isn't it? Everything bad always seems to happen in 'threes' and then before you it, it's all sunshine and rainbows again and wonderful opportunities get dropped in your lap. Let's just hope that the Harrison family had suffered it's threes for now—mom leaving, Tommy being married, and losing our home twice—seemed punishment enough for any transgressions any of us had ever committed—even dad's. I looked at dad then, and I suddenly realized why I had always been so close to him before—because, despite the mistakes he had made, when push came to shove, he was always there for us. He was like our anchor in the storm, and as I stared at him lovingly, I realized something else. His personality traits matched Tommy's quite a bit. They were both strong figures in my life that would slay demons to keep me safe. Wow! Two men like that in one lifetime made me one incredibly lucky woman. I took dad's hand in mine and squeezed it reassuringly as I felt a hand grip my shoulder, and I looked up into Jamie Andrews face as he leaned over us warily. I could tell that the sirens and the noise had awakened him because he was still wearing an old sweatshirt and pair of faded black flannel pajama bottoms—classic Jamie sleepwear—and I found myself on the verge of crying again as he rubbed his eyes and looked in mortification at the house behind us. It had been as much his home as ours over the years, and I felt his body tense with unshed tears as he hugged me, ignoring the soot that rubbed off on his clothes. I let him hold me as the first tears finally came—dripping through the black mess on my face slowly and with difficulty.

"Everyone's okay?" Jamie asked in a whisper as he pulled back from me slowly. I nodded gently.

"We're fine Jame." I said with another small sob as the fire department motioned for us to back away from the property line.

"I hate to ask you to leave, but its time we clean this mess up a little. Is there anywhere for you guys to go?" One of the workers asked gently. Jamie started to open his mouth but was suddenly interrupted when a figure appeared behind him.

"They can stay with me. I have more than enough room." Tom said into the darkness as I looked up at him with wide, expectant eyes. Was he being serious? Stuart looked at Tom a moment almost as if he were weighing his options carefully before finally nodding in acquiescence. I tried not to grin at his decision as a female voice behind us suddenly yelled, 'STUART!" I turned swiftly to see Yvette trying to cross the yellow police tape that had been draped around our property, and I saw dad smile as he rushed towards her. She cried as he lifted up the tape and pulled her into a hug, and my eyes widened as I looked over at Sadie in amusement. Wow, the woman really cared about him, and he had left her to come stay with us. I was more than impressed. Hell, I just felt plain loved. Watching the scene for a moment, I made my way slowly over to them grabbing my sore chest as I went until I was standing only a hand length apart from the hugging couple. Sometimes it takes tragedy to make you realize what's really important in your life. Yvette noticed me then and pushed herself away from dad as she perused me kindly. I didn't even flinch as she put her hand on my shoulder and looked down into my eyes.

"Are you okay, Jude?" She asked gently even though the two of us had never even met. I smiled faintly at her as I nodded before turning to dad.

"Why don't you go home with Yvette tonight, dad. Sadie and I will be just fine." I said casually as Tommy, Sadie, and Jamie sidled up behind me. Stuart looked at the two of us uncertainly before glancing at Tom.

"Are you all sure about this?" Stuart asked as Tom nodded while Sadie tapped her foot in agitation.

"What about your wife, Tom?" She asked bitingly as Stuart's jaw dropped and my heart plummeted. Stuart arched his brow.

"Wife?" He asked as Tommy shrugged and looked away.

"I'm separated—legally." He murmured as Stuart glanced over to me with a look of understanding. I think he knew now where the tears from earlier had come from. He looked at Sadie and I with a sigh.

"I'm going to let it be you girl's decision. You can stay at Tommy's if that's what you want or you can come with me to Yvette's." He stated quietly and I knew then that this was his way of letting us know we were old enough to make our own decisions. Sadie took a step backwards as she sighed heavily.

"I'll go wherever Jude decides to go." She said haltingly as I quirked a brow at her. I knew she still had feelings for Tommy. I wasn't an idiot, and I also knew she was hoping I would pick Tom. I just looked at dad evenly—not portraying any sign of emotions as I leaned over to hug him.

"You and Yvette could use some time." I said softly as Yvette smiled gratefully at me. "Sadie and I can stay with Tom until other arrangements can be made or he gets tired of us one." I said jokingly as Stuart nodded before hugging us one more time and following Yvette out of the yard—glancing back a final time at the house with a look of despair. I felt his pain. Our eyes caught as he started to follow Yvette again, and I gave him a "we can start over, and it'll be much better this time" look as he smiled and walked away.

"Are you ready?" Tom asked gently from behind me as I nodded mutely before turning to follow them out of the yard. A paramedic stopped me on the way out—giving me something to help the agitation in my chest and informing me that I would need to see a doctor for a follow up appointment. I agreed as I watched Tom trying to cover his seats in his viper with a blanket. I couldn't help it. I laughed. He threw his eyebrows up at me.

"What?" He asked with a shrug. "I can honestly say this has been the best woman in my life—strong, dependable, beautiful, and never demanding." He said with a chuckle although he threw me a look that said "although, I thinks that's starting to change." And I felt my body tingle with another emotion entirely as he held his door open and motioned for me to enter. I climbed in carefully as he circled the car and opened his own door, and as he started the vehicle up with a roar, Sadie and I both stared back at the house in numbing shock. I could feel tears burning against my eyelids again as I stared at the curling smoke still rising from the pile.

"I hope you had house insurance, Tom." I said lightly as he chuckled from behind me.

"You know me better than that." He said as I turned back to face the front—closing out yet another chapter in my life with a bang.


	28. Chapter 28

My palms sweated horribly as Tommy pulled into the driveway of his apartment complex, and I almost gasped at the luxuriousness of it. I mean I knew the man lived well, but damn, I was really starting to notice the slightly 'crisp' appearance of my clothes all of a sudden as I stared first at myself and then at the building. Not that Tom looked any better after running into the house after me, but he could be covered in mud and still look drop dead gorgeous. Don't you just hate people like that? I mean if you dropped me into a puddle of mud, I look like I've been dropped into a puddle of mud—simple as that. You drop Tom into a puddle of mud, and he comes out looking like he's sporting a new trendy spa treatment. I sighed as he pulled the keys from the ignition before looking over at us, and I lifted a brow as I stared at the doorman standing rigidly at the entrance of the complex while wondering, quite pathetically, if I was in some sort of screwed up romantic comedy where Tom was going to have to find a way to sneak his two very disheveled, smelly guests inside his room.

"This is not a suit and tie kind of joint is it, Tom?" I asked teasingly as he chuckled while Sadie rolled her eyes.

"Oh Please, Jude! It's just a house, and I really hear Tommy's shower calling to me up there." Sadie said as I shrugged at her before pushing open my car door trying my best not to envision both the words 'Tommy' and 'shower' in the same sentence. Uuuugghhhh! Sadie just had to say that, didn't she? I almost groaned at the thought as I climbed out to follow Tommy and Sadie to the door, and Tom looked back at me knowingly as if he knew exactly what I was thinking. The rat!

I smiled sheepishly at the 'butler' or whatever he was as Tommy greeted him merrily before slipping through the entrance. I saw the man peruse us suspiciously as we walked by him into the huge main room of the place, and I could just see housekeeping visibly cringe in my mind's eye as soot marks stood starkly against the carpet where we stepped gingerly. '_Oh, please God! Don't let Tom's floors be white_,' I thought to myself as we paraded up the stairs before climbing into a set of elevators marked Penthouse 1. I fidgeted nervously as we moved upward, tapping my foot to the beat of the new song I had been working on when Tom's foot suddenly stepped roughly onto the end of my toe, and I gasped as I looked up at him.

"What did you do that for?" I asked as I jumped up and down before grabbing my foot firmly while cursing silently at Tom as he just shrugged before leaning against the elevator door and chuckling.

"Because you are driving me nuts tapping your foot like that, Jude Harrison. If you're that uptight, wait until we get into my apartment, and I'll hand you a guitar. Okay?" He asked gently as I stared at him slightly bemused. So, I had a problem entering Tommy's domain. So what? It's not like I didn't have a right to. We had suddenly moved from only seeing each other at the studio and occasionally outside of it to me living with him for a short period of time athis house. Can you blame me if that was a big step for me? Okay, let me rephrase that. I was downright terrified. There was no way I could ignore the pain in my chest that tended to engulf my entire body when he was around now that we would be in constant proximity. And now knowing that he was married, I had to fight off the pain even more intensely than I had to before. The doors 'dinged' open as I lay immersed in my thoughts, and I could feel Sadie and Tommy both staring at me in bewilderment as I just stood there staring down at my feet taking that one small significant step into the one world I thought that I would never have access to—Tommy's world.


	29. Chapter 29

Okay now would be a good time for me to reiterate one very important point—reiterate it and then staple it in very big bold italic print to the front of my forehead: **_I love my sister, Sadie Harrison_**. Okay there it is—plain and simple. And why do I feel this need to shout this out over the rooftops and into every little nook and cranny? Simple. If I didn't, then I would have a very hard time reminding myself of that fact whenever she managed to do something that irritated the living hell out of me. Like _now_ for example.

I was still trying to process what I saw as I stepped through Tommy's front door—a big sweeping living room that sat starkly against a shining wooden floor with a fireplace situated against a cozy corner bordered by a very large big screen t.v., a cul-de-sac kitchen that housed every appliance in the world (Martha Stewart would be proud), and a small spiraling staircase that led to what looked like an entire set of rooms above our heads—when Sadie decided now would be a great time to announce her presence in true Sadie fashion.

"I think I need a shower." She said cheekily, as if she needed to point out the obvious, before flipping her shirt suddenly over her head and throwing it onto the floor in a small, dusty pile—leaving herself completely exposed with the exception of a bra and a very short pair of boy shorts as she looked towards Tommy pointedly as if asking 'where's the bathroom' with her eyes.

"Sadie!" I exclaimed as she stalked down a small hallway I hadn't noticed before behind me—throwing me a slightly hurt glance as she did.

"Grow up, Jude. It's nothing he hasn't seen from me before." She said sardonically, and my jaw snapped shut with a bang as if she had just thrown a huge pail of cold water over my head. Of course he had. They had dated once, and fairly seriously if I really wanted to be honest with myself. There was still that little trip to Europe they took that none of us would ever truly know all the details about. And, suddenly as I glanced over at Tom's even expression, I couldn't help but feel envy. Is it just me, or does it seem as if every woman in the hemisphere has had a chance with him but me? Now would be a good time to quit fooling myself. I watched Sadie round the corner with a slight sashay of her hips before glancing down miserably at the rags that still hung from my own soot-covered limbs.

"I have another bathroom, Jude." Tom stated quietly as I glanced over my shoulder at him—watching as his eyes burned into mine with an unreadable expression. I just shrugged as I gave him a small smile before pointing teasingly to Sadie's' crumpled shirt laying seductively on the floor.

"Okay, but don't expect me to do that." I said with a small laugh as I watched him grin down at me with a heated look in his eyes. My heart fluttered spasmodically as he lifted his hand suddenly before rubbing gently at the soot that still marred my face—running his fingertips first over my eyes and then over my cheekbones before finally easing them down the side of my neck and my shoulders.

"Of course not, Jude. Believe it or not, I expect more class from you." He stated huskily as his fingers wrapped firmly around mine—entwining them together resolutely before tugging gently at me until I realized that he was asking me to follow him. I practically stumbled as my body finally remembered to send signals to my brain as he led me to the stairs, and I stomped up them in horror as I realized the rooms above us were carpeted. I pulled quickly at Tommy's arms.

"I can't go up here, Tom. This stuff on me is hell to get out of fabrics." I said softly as he rolled his eyes up at me before continuing upward, dragging me as he went.

"I may be a perfectionist, Jude, but I do know people who can help me clean up any mess I can't deal with myself. So just take a deep breath and keep climbing." He said on a chuckle as I shook my head resolutely—clearing my mind of the image that Sadie had left me with. I could even understand her actions now. Even as strange as I felt saying this, I really wanted to take my clothes off in front of the guy too. Damn, who wouldn't? But I also wanted to be the one girl that left him wanting—because, obviously, I had discovered that most of the women in his past had just offered themselves to him on a silver platter, and I wanted him to have to work for me.

Hell! I mentally slapped myself on the head to wipe my mind again of all images. _"Stop it, Jude!"_ I yelled at myself bracingly. _He's married, he's married, he's married_. I kept running that thought through my head slowly but for some reason, it just wasn't doing it for me anymore because the only thing that managed to come to mind after that was—_but he's separated, he's separated, he's separated_. Geez, I was losing it!

"Are you okay, Jude?" Tom asked suddenly and my head jerked up as I realized we were standing in front of his spare bathroom. Oh dear God, it was in his bedroom!

"Uh…yeah, I'm fine." I stuttered helplessly as I looked over at Tom's bed before quickly looking away again. The damn thing was huge! Closing my eyes briefly, I heard Tom rustling through some of his dresser drawers before tapping me lightly on the shoulder.

"Change into these when you're done. I'm going to take something down to Sadie as well. Are you sure you're okay?" He asked again as I took the clothes from him and then nodded mutely. My world was suddenly too small—I needed to step away from him before I did something to embarrass myself, so I quickly walked into the bathroom and slammed the door behind me. Leaning against the door, I gasped as I saw myself in his mirror—quickly gagging as I realized I was almost completely and entirely black. God, I had to get this stuff off of me. I stripped quickly and turned on the water in the shower—staring mesmerized at the steam rising up from around the drain as I walked slowly under the stream of water to stare just as fascinated at the swirl of black that started circling the floor at my feet. I just stood there a moment absorbing the heat and watching until the water turned clear again before grabbing his soap and scrubbing with as much strength as my arms would allow until my skin started turning a rosy red. I must have stood there forever—letting the water drip over my head like a small waterfall because a knock at the door finally brought me out of my reverie.

"Jude, come on! We're going to order in something to eat." Sadie called through the door, and I stared forlornly at the pile of soot covered clothes bunched up in the corner of the room against the marble floor as I stepped away from the water in order to dry myself off and throw on the button up white shirt and green boxers that Tommy had handed me. I had to fold the boxers over three times to get them to fit around my waist, and the shirt fell quite a ways below my thighs as I tried my best to make it look even the slightest bit, I don't know, sexy maybe. But, oh, I was failing miserably. Shaking my head at my reflection, I threw open the door and skipped down the stairs determined not to let my wardrobe malfunction bother me until I saw Sadie. My jaw dropped as I reached the bottom of the stairs. She was wearing an old black T-Shirt that she had tied to circle her midriff while sporting similar black boxers folded until her rear was almost exposed. Well, there went my attempt at beautification. Tom smiled up at me as I shrugged a shoulder and leaped the rest of the way down—strolling over casually as the two of them leaned over a phone book obviously disagreeing with each other.

"What do you want, Jude?" Tom asked suddenly as I walked over to plop onto his couch, casually sinking into the soft material like a freakin' Cheshire cat.

"Uhh….Pizza's fine. I'm not picky." I said with a sigh as Sadie scoffed. I was too tired to care. I could feel my eyelids drooping as I rubbed my cheek against the fabric of his sofa reminding myself that I was definitely going to have to ask who his designer was. Oh, the wonder of it! I felt like I was on a cloud, and I guess the comfy feel of it finally got to me because I vaguely remember Tommy stooping down in front of me before my entire world went black.


	30. Chapter 30

**Author's Note: Here's to all you reviewers who loaded those reviews up with 'pleases.' I wrote this chapter just for you. You guys are great. Please R&R.

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Waking up suddenly from a deep sleep, I grabbed at my stomach in misery as a wave of nausea crashed like a five point wave over me, causing me to dry retch before standing up and stumbling towards the bathroom—falling hard onto Tom's shiny wooden floor and cursing at myself as I felt the jolt of pain radiate throughout my knee and calf.

"Jude?" I heard Tommy call sleepily through the dark, and I shoved my fist forcefully into the pit of my stomach as I whimpered up at his faceless silhouette. He must have gotten the gist because he stepped into the light suddenly—leaning down next to me with a look of pure concern. Oh, my face must have been paler than the full moon outside because Tommy leaned over suddenly and scooped me up like a baby before rushing me gently to the nearest rest room.

"It's just side effects from the smoke, Jude." Tom said reassuringly as he set me down gently and hurried expertly to grab a wet cloth out of his linen closet.

"Oh God!" I moaned as I leaned over the toilet and retched again, wheezing as my chest protested the movement. Tom had just handed me the washcloth when a sound behind us caused him to turn around although I couldn't do anything but stare down into blue toilet water. Attractive, I know.

"What's going on here?" A sleepy Sadie asked from the doorway as she rubbed at her eyes grouchily before she saw me leaning over the toilet ceremoniously. Oh lookie, her hair was tousled and her mascara had run. Not so sexy now, were we, Sades? Oh, and if only I could enjoy it more, but the constant waves of nausea were a strong reminder of why I could care less if Sadie were naked right now.

"Ooohhhh!" I moaned again as the retching continued without any ease in sight, and Sadie gagged at the whole scene as Tom pointed out the door into the hallway.

"I've got this Sadie. Just go back to sleep. I think your gagging is just making it worse." Tommy said gently as he rustled Sadie out of the room before pulling my hair back behind my head with his hands twisting it while reaching into a drawer for a rubber band.

"Men don't need scrunchies so this will have to do." He said lightly as he pulled my hair through the rigid loop so that it hung down my back instead of in my face. I tried glancing at him gratefully but my stomach knotted and I couldn't do anything but moan. He left me then, and I could hear him rifling through something in his kitchen before coming to stand back behind me.

"Take this. The paramedic told me you might need it." He said as he filled a spoon up with some obnoxious smelling liquid before motioning for me to open my mouth. I gasped as the odor hit me.

"Are you trying to make me sicker?" I asked on a gag, as I turned toward the toilet again. Tom grabbed my chin with his hand and slowly turned me back toward him, and I sighed at the serious look that had crept into his eyes.

"Just take it, Jude." He said with a slight edge to his tone as I opened my mouth immediately to obey. He quirked a brow as he shoved the metal into my mouth, and I almost choked as I got my first good look at him that night. Oh Jesus! He was naked from the waist up except for a small tattoo that edged along the ridge of his shoulder, and the boxers that he wore did nothing to save my imagination or my sanity. Why did God keep doing this to me? I wanted to pound my head against the rim of the toilet as I let my forehead rest there miserably instead—listening as Tommy filled a cup up with water at his sink.

"Try drinking this." He said gently as I took the paper cup from him and downed the contents in one gulp. I could feel the medicine working as it eased the spasms in my abdomen, but the pain still remained as I stood up slowly in order to walk back into his living room again—aiming, not so coincidentally, toward his angel soft couch. I could hear him behind me as I moved, and my body tightened ruthlessly as I lost my footing and stumbled. I felt his firm grip wrap around my arm as he caught me before helping me walk the rest of the way toward the piece of furniture. I sighed in relief when I felt the fabric give way under me before rolling myself protectively into a small, little ball.

"I'm fine, Tom. Why don't you just go back to bed?" I said quietly as I reached for the blanket he must have laid over me earlier from the end of the couch. He took it from me gently as I lifted it up before sitting down next to me and pulling me up against his chest.

"I think I'll watch a little t.v. for a little while." He said as he wrapped the blanket around the two of us before picking up his remote control and flipping absent-mindedly through the channels. I knew he wasn't really watching it as I felt my stomach tighten and then ease up again, and I almost sobbed with the uncomfortable pangs caused by the spasms as Tommy ran his hand over my hair soothingly. I got lost in the rhythm of his heart beat as an old rerun of Seinfeld played behind us, and I snickered at something George Costanza said as I took in a deep breath carefully.

"Feeling better?" Tommy murmured against my hair, and I nodded mutely as I lay there—still too afraid to straighten my legs out in case the spasms came again. I was hurting in so many ways.

"Mom's gone." I said quietly as I felt his arm tighten around me.

"I know. " He replied as I lay staring blankly into the dark watching in fascination as the light from the t.v. flickered over his furniture.

"You're married." I said again as Tom sighed heavily.

"I know." He repeated as I clung desperately to my knees.

"The house is gone." I said finally as Tommy let his head fall against mine.

"I know." He remarked a final time as the tears finally came, and I didn't even try to wipe them away as they landed on Tom's naked chest—running like rivulets down his abdomen, and he didn't even flinch as I unleashed my fury.


	31. Chapter 31

**Author's Note: Okay, I really hate the weekends because I can never get online but I really try to make up for it by posting a lot during the week. Thank you guys so much for the reviews. I have so many more things planned for this story, and I am so excited that Tom and Jude's chemistry is sparking flames. Oh, man Friday's episode left me in need of a cold shower (lol). I can't wait for this Friday. So here goes for the next couple of chapters, and as for what's to come—we still have to find out Tommy's other dark secrets and what happens when Spied and Tom become partners in a venture, Are Tom's feelings for Jude as deep as hers are for him, and will Kwest….okay going to leave you hanging there. You guys are so fantastic! I bow down to your reviews. Hope you enjoy what comes next. Smiles. Please R&R. Angel.

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I felt drained—almost as if every drop of water in my body had dissipated, leaving me a dry husk of nothing. I still felt him there rubbing my hair as if the constant movement would also erase the anger, the frustration, and the loss. _"This,"_ I thought to myself as I mentally pointed to my own chest in irritation, _"Is my life." _I could never do any thing simple. Why is that? I mean, what's so wrong with simple? I turned this thought over and over in my head as I felt Tom shift subtly beneath me, and I knew that things had changed between us. We had become so much more than producer and artist over the past year, but I also knew that he had secrets—secrets that could collapse that fragile bond we had finally started to develop, and I was afraid of them. When had he become my reason for needing to be in Toronto at G Majors studio? Was it on tour? Or was it that first moment that I had turned around and scoffed at the idea of having a former boy bander handling my music? Would I ever even know? Probably not.

"You mean a lot to me Tom." I said suddenly, feeling Tom tense at the words as he pushed himself up further against the back of the couch. He sighed as he picked up the t.v. remote and turned down the volume.

"You mean a lot to me too, Jude." He said haltingly as I took a deep breath and braced myself for my next words.

"No, I mean, you…I spend a lot of time thinking about you, Tom. Maybe, way too much time, I don't know. I just know that it has become like a huge obstacle in my brain. I shove at it and shove at it, and the only thing it does is grow bigger until I find myself pouring it out into my music and my diaries hoping that it will relieve the pressure, but nothing seems to cure the ailment." I said quietly as I felt Tom become rigid behind me.

"Jude…" He growled, grabbing my chin with his hand before lifting my head up to meet with his bent one until our lips were smashed together—melded like iron—and my blood became like molten lava as he deepened the kiss to a degree of intensity that, if I didn't know better, made steam lift off our bodies in waves. I gripped his arms roughly because I needed to feel him, because I just couldn't seem to get enough.

"Jude, are you feeling better yet?" A voice asked from near the hallway, and I practically shot to the other end of the couch like a bullet as Tom and I looked incredulously at each other—shock emanating from every pore of our being as our chests rose and fell in similar harsh cadences. Where the hell had that kiss come from? Shit! I placed my fingers unconsciously on my lips almost as if I were afraid the sensation would disappear as Sadie suddenly materialized drowsily behind the sofa.

"Jude?" She asked again as her eyes suddenly widened before looking between Tom and I suspiciously. I couldn't speak. Oh, God I needed to speak right now—needed to say anything for God's sake just as long as I didn't say the one thing that came foremost to my mind because that would just blow everything all to hell.

"I'm fine." I finally gasped as Sadie lowered her head with narrowed eyes.

"Are you sure? You can always come sleep with me like we did when we were kids." Sadie said softly as I almost choked at her choice of words.'Sleep with' was just not something I needed to hear right now so I just shook my head mutely—grabbing for the blanket and pulling it up over my chest self-consciously almost as if the thin barrier were some kind of emotional armor. Tom fidgeted a moment before looking first at Sadie and then at me with an understanding expression before standing up and moving to the back of the room.

"I think it's time for me to head back up to my room. If you need anything, just let me know. We'll need to be at the studio early tomorrow." Tom said softly before turning on his heel and jogging casually up the stairs—giving us both a good look at the hard muscles in his back and calves. The flash of his bare feet caught my eye, and I sighed in frustration. There's something about a barefoot person that really makes you go soft in the heart—maybe because it's a sign of letting go, of taking it easy, of just plain vulnerability. Or maybe it's just something metaphysical? Who knows?

"Do you need anything else, Jude?" Sadie asked shortly from beside me, and I looked up hurriedly to realize that she had moved from behind the couch to the place where Tom had been sitting earlier. I let my face go blank as I looked up at her. What was wrong with me? What kind of sister was I to find myself daydreaming about a guy that I knew Sadie had already been with? I just shook my head at both myself and I at her.

"Really I'm fine, Sadie." I said with a shrug as I let myself look over at the clock above Tom's T.V.—1:00 a.m.—ohhhhh, so much longer to go until morning. The couch dipped down subtly as Sadie sat down beside me, and I almost screamed into the blanket I had pulled up to my chin when I saw her expression. I was so not in the mood for one of Sadie's deep, spiritual type talks.

"Don't Sades." I said softly as I pulled my knees back up to my chest slowly. "Please." I finished imploringly as she just looked at me a moment forlornly before leaning over to pull the rubber band out of my hair so that she could pull on a strand of one of the soft tendrils meaningfully.

"You don't have to worry about me lecturing you, Jude. Truth be told, I wouldn't know where to start even if I did. I'm…uh… just a little confused here, Jude. I feel like I've just walked into a very important moment, and I'm not sure how I feel about that. I love you. I do. I…just. He's married." She said in despair as I looked over at her just as sadly.

"I know." I said as we both leaned heavily into the fabric of the sofa with a sigh. One quick look at each other and we suddenly burst out laughing.

"Men!" We said together before both turning to look up at the stairs deep in thought. She was right. What did it matter about the little moments we shared together. He was married—no, excuse me—legally separated. Ugghhhhh! I grabbed a pillow off the end of the couch and pressed my face into it before screaming with all my might. Boy that felt damn good. Handing it to Sadie, I grinned cheekily at her shocked expression.

"Your turn." I said as she suddenly grinned back at me before grabbing the flimsy couch decoration—screaming into it just as loudly as I had done before.

"Feels good, doesn't it?" I asked on a chuckle as she nodded before standing up and throwing it at my head.

"It does actually. Maybe I can go get some real sleep now." She said with a slight laugh, and I quirked a brow at her as I caught the pillow in mid-air before it struck me in the forehead.

"Good night, Sadie." I said softly as she turned to walk back toward the hallway.

"You too, Jude." She replied back just as quietly before disappearing into the shadows beyond. Oh, how much I hated that I couldn't forget him—how much he intervened in all the relationships in my life, first with Spied and now with Sadie. I really needed….I don't know what I needed. Staring at the bottom of the stairs, I stood up slowly, gasping at the slight pain in my stomach as I walked barefoot across the floor to the bottom of the railing. What was I doing? Looking up the winding monstrosity, I took one step upward before closing my eyes, shaking my head, and then stepping back down again. _Not a smart idea, Harrison_. I had just turned to head back over to the couch when I made the mistake of looking up, and there he was—leaning against the balcony looking just as torn as I did almost as if he had tried to walk down those same stairs as many times as I was fighting to keep from walking up. We smiled at each other a moment before both of us turned and walked in opposite directions. I winced as I heard his bedroom door close above me. It just wasn't the right time. But when would be?


	32. Chapter 32

"Jude…Jude wake up." I heard someone murmuring softly as I cracked one eye open painfully before finding myself peering into the very amused eyes of a very very sexy looking Tom Quincy. His hair was slightly damp, and I had to fight to keep myself from reaching up to touch it as Tom leaned down next to me a little impatiently.

"It's time to get moving, girl." He said softly as I closed my eyes again before trying to sit up slowly only to lay back down again with a gasp. Oh, my entire chest was on fire! I grabbed at it as I opened my mouth up to speak, but when I tried to reply to him, the only thing that came out was a croak. Opening my eyes again, I saw Tommy looking down at me uneasily.

"Are you alright?" He asked as I shrugged up at him weakly before pointing to my throat. He lifted his hand up and placed it onto my forehead before sighing deeply.

"I think I'm going to call the doctor. You feel a little warm, Jude." He said before standing up and walking over to his phone—glancing at me as he dialed before turning away when someone picked up the other line. I couldn't even catch his side of the conversation because he paced ceremoniously into the kitchen before answering whoever it was he was talking to. I just lay there looking up at the ceiling when his face suddenly materialized above me.

"You want anything to drink while we wait on the doctor?" He asked quickly as I quirked a brow in amusement, moaning as I tried to speak before finally motioning for a tablet of paper that sat on the end of the coffee table. Tommy chuckled as he leaned over and handed it to me, and I scribbled furiously before turning it around with a flourish. Tom laughed at the scribbling—_'Doctors make house calls?'_ before handing me a glass of water.

"They do if you're Tommy Q." He said with a self-important pat on his own back as I picked up a pillow and hurled it at him. He caught it with a flourish before chuckling merrily.

"I guess if you're striving for honesty, then I'd have to tell you that this doctor is actually a friend of mine and can afford to come by. Besides, he lives in the penthouse above me." He said starting to sit down next to me when a sudden knock at the door had us both turning toward it expectantly. Sadie rounded the corner just then, dressed in a pink tank top and faded blue jean capris with a pink patch at the knee.

"I've got it." She said sunnily as she pulled the door open only to stammer at the person on the other side. The man just smiled as he pushed past her into the room. Damn! He was fine. Tom stood up and met him half way before shaking hands with him and pointing to me on the couch. I almost sighed in revulsion. God, I had to look absolutely disgusting!

"Hi, Jude. I'm Dr. Marks although you can just call me Devon. Tom filled me in on what happened yesterday, and he says you're having a hard time speaking this morning. Does your chest hurt too?" He asked cheerfully as he came to kneel beside me, and I just nodded with wide eyes as he pulled out a stethoscope and tongue compressor.

"Can you sit up for me?" He asked as I nodded while watching Sadie sidle up behind me out of the corner of my eye. Something told me she wasn't worried much about Tommy anymore. I would have laughed at the irony if the thought of laughing didn't hurt so much. I shivered as 'Devon' lifted my shirt up enough to put the stethoscope up to the top of my chest, and I took a few deep breaths before opening my mouth obediently so that he could take a good look at the back of my throat. I saw him quirk a brow at me before sitting back on his heels and pulling the blanket back over me gently. Sadie almost fainted as he looked up at her with a winsome smile before looking back down at me again. Tom edged up beside him before crossing his arms across his chest.

"Well, what's the verdict?" Tommy asked as he looked over at me with a small smile. Dr. Marks wrote something down on a tablet before tearing it off and handing it to Tom.

"Looks like she has bronchitis and a pretty good case of laryngitis—not unusual in people who've been exposed to large amounts of smoke. She'll be fine in a couple of days, but until then…" He said firmly before looking down at me pointedly. "I don't want you going anywhere. You can wear Tom's CD and movie collection out, and that's about it on movement." He finished with a wry shake of his finger before smiling at Tom and winking inconspicuously.

"It might even be good if someone stays with her off and on throughout the day to make sure she's doing what I ask. Her voice shouldn't be affected by the disturbance, but I don't want her trying to talk for a few days." Devon remarked with another pointed look at me as Tom chuckled uncontrollably beside him.

"Oh that should be easy." Tom said sarcastically as I looked over at the couch pillow with narrowed eyes. He was seriously about to get it in the face. Devon laughed.

"I think I had better make my escape before the fireworks fly. Pick up that medicine I gave you the prescription for and just follow the directions on the bottle." He said with a grin as he started to make his way toward the door. Sadie jumped suddenly away from the couch as if she had been bitten by a mound full of ants.

"Uhhh…I need to be heading to the studio." She said with a quick glance at me before following on Devon's heels.

"Take care of yourself, Jude." She threw over her shoulder almost as an afterthought as the door slammed behind her. I sighed heavily. This was a nightmare—stuck in Tom's domain—trying my damndest not to be affected by it. Oh yeah, that was going to happen. Uggghhhh! I heard Tom moving around at the edge of his living room as I sat up enough that I could see over the edge of the sofa. I could see him leaning over a guitar case near the edge of the wall, and I quirked a brow as he brought it over to me.

"Now would be a good time to work on your music." He said matter-of-factly before setting the case in front of me and grabbing his car keys off of the coffee table.

"I am headed to the studio. I'll send someone over here to look in on you in a little bit, and don't worry about Darius. I've got a handle on him, and I'll get Sadie to call your dad, alright?" He asked as I just looked up at him wearily. Finally I reached over and grabbed the same paper from earlier.

"_I'll be fine_." I scribbled sloppily before turning it toward Tom with a sigh. He laughed as he headed for the door.

"I hope this voice thing doesn't last long, sweetheart, because your handwriting is horrible." He said in amusement before walking out the door in a rush. I stared at the wooden enclosure for quite a while after it had shut behind him wondering if he even noticed that he had called me 'sweetheart.'


	33. Chapter 33

I had watched the same episode of 'Grey's Anatomy' three times before I finally threw the remote down in absolute boredom. Looking around suddenly, I sighed as I looked over at the guitar that Tommy had laid on the floor beside me. I couldn't sing, but I couldn't see why I couldn't write so I picked up a piece of paper and started scribbling furiously—completing the song that I had started right before the fire.

_My rainbow at the end of the storm_

_My triumph at the end of the day_

_My path strays from the offered norm_

_And still I look to him to guide my way_

_Chorus:_

_I fight an inner battle with self-control_

_A weak, futile attempt at saving my soul_

_But it wriggles its way out of my grasp_

_And into the fray, I find myself lapse._

_Where is my hero, my confidante, my knight_

_Riding in on his charger, like a sexy James Dean_

_Fresh from the emotional fight_

_With those steamy glances, oh what do they mean?_

_So frustrated, throwing glass against the wall_

_Kicking out at helpless objects, at a stretchless void_

_Tripping over the destruction to find myself fall_

_With nothing to hold onto, my eternal struggle, like philosophies of Freud_

_Chorus:_

_I fight an inner battle with self-control_

_A weak, futile attempt at saving my soul_

_But it wriggles its way out of my grasp_

_And into the fray, I find myself lapse._

_The main questions who, what, where, and why_

_Keep invading my thoughts like alien life forms_

_Mutating themselves into my brain, like an irritating fly_

_Buzzing incessantly until I fight to conform_

_What is this madness that overwhelms my heart_

_I feel weak and helpless, like a scared victim in a horror flick_

_Each tendril of my being feels like its being torn apart_

_And yet, I fight the good fight trying to be witty, to be strong and quick_

_Chorus:_

_I fight an inner battle with self-control_

_A weak, futile attempt at saving my soul_

_But it wriggles its way out of my grasp_

_And into the fray, I find myself lapse._

I wrote hurriedly before looking over the finished product critically—almost banging my head against the side of the couch when I realized just how frustrated I sounded in the lyrics. I felt like I needed a trip to bedlam but without the shock treatments, or maybe with them. Who knows? A bang at the door made me look up cautiously—stuffing the notebook under the couch quickly—my feelings too fresh to be exposed. I tried calling out for whoever it was to 'come in' until I realized that I couldn't speak, and I mumbled to myself irritably as I stood up and made my way slowly over to the door—pulling it open with a continuous scowl plastered across my features. My mouth dropped open in an 'oh this is going to be so much fun' expression as I slammed the door closed again ceremoniously.

"I always thought you looked incredibly sexy in men's clothing, Jude Harrison." Spied said sardonically as he pushed the door open again with a haughty look on his face before looking over his shoulder in amusement at Jamie Andrews.

"She's a riot in the a.m." Jamie said with a chuckle, and I moaned at the pathetic rejoinder. Why me? I scurried back over to the sofa and my security net of blankets and pillows before scribbling something on my "I can't speak" tablet and handing it to them with quirked brows. 'Who sent you?' it read, and they both laughed at the unspoken frustration.

"Sadie." They said in unison as I rolled my eyes skyward. I should have known. I was starting to think I had just as many exes as Tommy with the exception that I had not swapped as many bodily fluids with them other than saliva. Bars of 'Joy to the world' was suddenly playing through my head as I picked up the pillow and placed it squarely over my face.

"How about a game of strip poker?" Spied asked suddenly, and I moaned again as I flipped over and scurried underneath the blanket. This wasn't happening. All I needed now was to have that 'sitting in the middle of the room naked dream' come to realization as another knock at the door had me quivering underneath Tom's satin comforter. I heard one of the boys open the door, and the voice that reverberated throughout the room sounded just a tid bit too sunny as Portia called out that she had viddles for the sick soul. I cringed. Oh, this was so a Jerry Springer Show waiting to happen.


	34. Chapter 34

_**Tommy and Kwest at the Studio…**_

"So, you have her staying at your house, wearing your clothes. Man, how's that working for you?" Kwest asked with a small shake of his head as Tommy threw him a sideways glance full of self-denial.

"It's working." Tommy stated flatly as Kwest pushed a button on the soundboard before turning back toward Tom with a grim expression on his face.

"That was a loaded answer, Quincy. I just hope you know what you're doing. You have a hell of a lot of baggage man." Kwest said as he pushed one more button, and they both watched in expectation as Jude's completed album shot out of the machine. Tom grabbed it before turning it over and over with a grin.

"I haven't done anything." He said finally before holding up the completed silver disc excitedly—using the process as an excuse to escape from the room.

"I need to get this to Darius." Tom said pointedly—starting to turn toward the open door when Kwest suddenly grabbed him by the shoulder.

"She's seventeen, Tom." Kwest said quietly not even flinching as Tommy threw him a scathing look over his shoulder. He just shook his head instead. "I'm not going to say anything to you about her age anymore. What I am going to do is point out to you just how vulnerable she is. She could have any man she wanted that didn't lead her around on a leash—tugging her around and expecting her to go through emotional hell waiting for the man she cares about to make a decision about what _he _wants out of life. It isn't fair to her, Tom. Just from the short time I spent as her producer, I realized pretty quickly that she deserves more than that." Kwest said as Tom sighed angrily—both at himself and at the realization that Kwest was right.

"And what does she deserve, Kwest? Is it someone like you?" Tom asked in a huff, biting back his words regretfully as he silently berated himself for his frustration. His indecision wasn't Kwest's fault. Kwest raised his brows sardonically as Tom looked back at him apologetically.

"I've known you long enough not to let that direct cut hurt me too deeply, but I will say this. At least, I wouldn't keep breaking her heart, piecing it back together, and then shattering it all over again. Geez, she's been through a lot this year even if her baggage doesn't even closely compare to yours. She's still human. She still hurts, and she's passionate enough that if, push comes to shove, she could explode. I don't want to see that happen." Kwest stated firmly as Tommy quirked a brow at Kwest with a strained look etched across his face.

"Do you want her, Kwest?" He asked suddenly as Kwest's mouth nearly fell open in shock at the question, and he sat down with a 'huh' expression on his face as Tom leaned over menacingly.

"Because I want her. I mean really want her, and I am having a hell of a time controlling myself when I'm around her. She is like fire in my blood, and I know without a shadow of a doubt that I keep confusing the hell out of her, but she's no more confused than I am. I can't stand being left alone in a room with her because if we ever get started, without interruption, I can almost guarantee I won't stop. Is that what you want to hear? That the idea of getting her in bed with me is like a freakin' balm to my soul." Tommy asked as Kwest just sat there dumb-founded. Finally all he could do was shake his head as Tom turned and hurried from the room, banging across the studio almost in a frenzied fury before spotting Sadie sitting behind the desk of the studio filing her nails prettily. He stopped across from her with a heated look in his eyes—needing to scream in frustration but clenching his jaw together instead.

"Did you send Jamie to look in on Jude?" He asked through gritted teeth as Sadie looked around the room cautiously—spotting Kwest leaning against the wall behind Tom. The questioning look in her eyes as she perused Tom nervously was met with a shrug as Sadie just stuttered.

"I did, and I may have told Spied and Portia to look in on her too." She said sweetly as Tom sucked in a shocked breath while Kwest snickered slightly from behind them.

"Geez, Sadie! We're trying to make the girl feel better. Not kill her." Tommy said in exasperation as he banged his fist down on the desk in agitation. He looked back at Kwest with a raised brow. "Can you do damage control over at my place until I can get this pitched to Darius?" He asked suavely as Kwest grinned at the room at large.

"Why not?" He shrugged before pulling his keys out of his pocket, and walking over to the door in resignation. Boy, the things he would do for Tom Quincy. Sadie quirked a brow as Tommy stomped into Darius's office without even asking Sadie if Darius was busy as Liam came rounding the corner as if he were on a mission.

"Sadie, I'm going to need you to go on a small trip with me and bring a notebook." Liam remarked cryptically as Sadie shrugged and grabbed a tablet quickly in order to follow Liam out of the room.


	35. Chapter 35

_**Jude at Tom's apartment...**_

"Wow! We almost have a party going on in here." Portia said merrily as she dropped a bag of gourmet soup in an indecorous heap on the floor next to my trailing blanket. The odor of it tantalized my nose as I peeked cautiously over the coverlet—praying as I did that the powers at large would manage to save my sanity as I watched Portia gaze curiously over the apartment with a quirked brow.

"Still living it large even with a wife and a monthly alimony payment. I give him my fullest and deepest respects." Portia stated sarcastically as I winced at her damaged tone. Couldn't these people see I needed sleep, not an emotional roller coaster ride?

"He's definitely got a fine decorator. I wonder if he's doing her too?" Spied said with a wry lift of his brow as he leaned over and started digging through my bag of soup before unearthing a few packs of crackers. He held them up in front of me as if silently asking if he could have them, and I just nodded my head mutely as he ripped into them—watching as a few stray crumbs drifted to the floor purposely. "Oops." Spied remarked with a shrug as he literally jumped into an armchair and slouched lazily. I just groaned inwardly. I was so not in the mood for this. I scribbled furiously on the tablet I had pulled under the blanket with me before holding it up for all of them to see. _'I'm fine. You guys can go now!" _It read, and Jamie squinted at it myopically, as if he weren't wearing too perfectly serviceable contacts. I threw my eyes up at him as Spied laughed.

"Leave now? We haven't even done anything to entertain you yet. How about a game of 'hide n seek.' I'm very interested in the hiding places Tom has in this big place." Spied said with a chuckle before leaping down off the chair and moving around the place leisurely. Oh, God! Couldn't these people get anything into their heads when it was boldly displayed before them? Portia grinned as she pointed at the lunch bag.

"Eat up, Jude. I agree with Spied. This place has a huge prospective area made just for a little game of 'let's see what Tom's hiding now' possibilities." Portia remarked with a small smile as I groaned and looked down at the food miserably. I had just lost my appetite. Jamie rounded the couch and poked at my blanket with a small grin.

"It's like letting loose a couple of tigers. I would try to stop them, but I'm afraid that I'd get bit. That's what I use Patsy for. She's my guard dog." He said with a small laugh as I raised a brow at him and scribbled again on the tablet. He laughed as he read what I wrote—_"Is that what all the dog collars she wears is for?"_ Then he shrugged.

"What can I say?" Jamie teased as I heard a loud bang on the floor above our heads. I winced as Portia came sauntering down the stairs with a mischievous look etched across her features.

"So, Jude, is there a reason a heap of your clothes are piled in the corner of Tom's personal bathroom?" Portia asked with wide, expectant eyes as I felt my cheeks grow red in indignation. I couldn't even argue with her as I grunted up at the stairs. Portia just grinned wider.

"Don't worry about answering, Jude. Your flushed cheeks speak volumes on their own. He's quite a man, isn't he? Takes you amazing places if you let him." Portia said with a introspective glance at me, and I literally choked on my own spittle as I tried to swallow around the lump that had developed in the middle of my throat. I was more than just a little insulted. Jamie raised his hand defensively in Portia's direction.

"That's was way out of line, Portia." Jamie said with a grimace as Spied came to stand like a warrior at Portia's right shoulder.

"Was it?" Spied asked dryly as I felt a wave of nausea sweep over my system. I just couldn't deal with this right now.

"Why don't you guys wait and ask Tommy that?" A voice asked suddenly from the side of the room, and I sighed in obvious relief as I caught a glimpse of Kwest's glorious face standing piously at the door. I had never been so glad to see anyone in my life. Kwest looked over at me with a small smile before pointing a little irritably at the door.

"I think we're all pretty much needed at the studio so it may be a good idea if you leave Jude to her rest. Jamie, they need someone to watch the receptionist desk. Portia, the wardrobe department is in an uproar since Tom and I finished Jude's album this morning. And, Spied, Darius would like to speak with you and SME about a solo opportunity. So, let's scoot and get to it." Kwest said with such authority that I almost laughed. It just wasn't in his character to be a leader. Although I was really really beginning to like him in that role at the present moment. Portia glared at him as she stomped past him out the door followed closely by Spied. Jamie stopped a moment and pulled out an old 'Kung Fu' movie before laying it out on the coffee table across from me.

"For old time's sake." He said with a small laughe as I grinned up at him gratefully—watching as he followed the rest of the group out the door before I was left alone, quite gratefully so, with Kwest. Kwest glanced out the door before walking over to me slowly.

"Are you feeling any better?" He asked as I nodded up at him before writing on my tablet. I was really starting to hate paper. _"My album's finished?" _I wrote excitedly as Kwest grinned at me with an easy quirk of his brow.

"It is, and Tom's pitching it to Darius as we speak. I even brought you a copy." Kwest remarked with a grin as I grabbed for it with nothing short of giddiness. Kwest watched with an amused smile as I turned it over and over in my hand lovingly before looking back up at the door.

"I think I'm going to leave you two to bond." Kwest said while indicating myself and the disc that I held like a lifeline in my grip. I just nodded at him as I heard his foot steps move toward the door. Lifting myself up suddenly, I mouthed the words 'thank you' at him as he waved at me before shutting the door. I sighed. Once again, I was drained. Now would be a good time to take a long, hot shower.


	36. Chapter 36

I turned on the shower faucet in Tommy's private bathroom full blast—watching the steam rising from the falling spray as I discarded my clothes and stepped into the cascade with a resolute and satisfied sigh—reveling in the feel of warm water as it swept over my skin and hair in a comforting caress. I almost melted against the wall—gasping as the steam opened up the irritated passages in my lungs, and I scrubbed incessantly at the gritty feel on my skin that lying on a couch all day can sometimes make you feel.

I must have stood there forever because my fingers and toes were starting to wrinkle when I heard a sudden persistent 'bang' downstairs, and I jumped in startled apprehension as I grabbed a huge terry cloth towel off the wrack outside—folding it around me like a protective blanket before tying it firmly into a knot on the side. The banging started again, and I felt my body grow cold with dread at the loud persistence of it—realizing that if it had been someone I knew, then they would have called my cell phone to either wake me up or find out what I was doing. I tip-toed out of the stall, brushing my hair off of my shoulder as I rounded the corner of Tommy's bedroom, staring wide-eyed at the closed bedroom door as I tried to figure out if I should go down and find out who was knocking down below. An abrupt movement behind me made me shriek in alarm as a hand suddenly closed over my mouth, and I kicked ruthlessly at my invisible assailant as he grunted and groaned before wrestling me into a more submissive position.

"Be still, Jude. My wife just drove up, and I'm trying my best to pretend no one's home." Tommy said in a whisper from over my right shoulder, and I shivered as his breath fanned over my ear making the water droplets still glistening on my skin move chillingly down into the folds of my towel—a towel that became only a pathetic barrier between my modesty and the desire to just fling it aside in abandon. Geez, what was wrong with me? I squirmed insistently again, very uncomfortable with Tom's proximity as I held the towel desperately to my skin as if it were in some kind of danger of falling.

"Jude, you are so going to have to quit moving, sweetheart, or there will be definite hell to pay." Tom said in a husky growl as I grew suddenly deathly still—feeling the blood in my body move like fire through my veins at the restraint that I heard seeping though Tommy's tone.

"I know you're in there, Tom!" Justine shouted from down below as Tommy's arms wrapped more firmly around me in aggravation. I don't think he even noticed the proximity his sudden movements brought us in, but I was instantly very alert to the feel of his blue jeans pressing against the back of my towel as my back came to rest resolutely against his chest before his hand quickly fell silently to his side as he realized I wasn't in any danger of screaming anymore. No, I was in danger of doing oh so much more than that. And that had me standing rigid in both fear and expectation.

I think it was then that it clicked in Tommy's brain because I felt his arms loosen considerably as one of his hands rested suddenly on the middle of my stomach while his other hand came up to brush my hair to one side of my neck before standing in awe, it seemed, at the intimate position we suddenly found ourselves in. Oh God! I needed him. The knocking downstairs continued, but Tommy and I had all but blocked it out as he quickly and delicately ran one of his fingertips over my bare shoulder causing me to shiver as he followed that with the warm, insistent press of his lips. It felt forbidden somehow knowing that he was touching me like this as his wife knocked at the barricade down below, and although the thought should have disgusted me, it seemed to inflame me instead and I turned around slowly—letting my gaze meet with Tommy's dilated pupils in nervous anticipation. Tom shook his head in frustration, and I could see a raging battle being fought behind the reflection of his eyes as he plunged both his hands into the mound of wet hair that fell like a curtain down my back so that he could maneuver my head as his lips met with mine in a furious game of 'how close can I get." I bit back a moan as he lifted me suddenly—carrying me over to the bed in a varied tangle of loose limbs and twisted fingers as his hand crept up my thigh, playing with the hem of the towel in a frantic dance while fighting to keep himself from unknotting it to allow him access to what lay beneath. I didn't fight him as the material started to lift slowly, bunching up against my side as a sudden grating noise from down below suddenly broke into our concentration causing me to stare up in horror as I realized his wife must have figured out a way to get his front door open. Shit! What was I doing? Tommy and I separated instantly although his hand still rested against my thigh and I shifted restlessly as he fought to pull away from me—pointing in silence to his bathroom as he headed for his bedroom door with a sigh. I could barely move as I looked at the steamy bathroom with a numb feeling spreading throughout my limbs before I finally found the strength to march over to the door—closing it behind me with a resolute 'click' before sliding down the bathroom wall in resounding frustration. Maybe it was time I let Tommy know exactly what he meant to me. Maybe it was time for me to take that last forbidden step. On my own. Maybe darkness would give me the courage to do so.


	37. Chapter 37

**Author's Note: Hey guys! I am absolutely thrilled with the reviews I have gotten. You guys are defnitely my pick me upper when life gets me down. What would I do without you? Smiles. My twin sister is home from out of state and things have been crazy. Okay, but enough about my drama, I have some great things coming for the story that I hope will keep you guys coming back for more. Things are heating up for Jude and Tommy, but will life intrude and become the bucket of water that cools them off fast? Once again, hugs and shout outs to you all. Please R&R, and most of all, just enjoy. Smiles.**

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**"This is one hell of a time to make an appearance, Justine." Tom said with a frustrated growl as he met his alluring, yet evil wife halfway down the stairs. Justine just glanced up at him easily before looking over Tom's shoulder with a mixture of suspicion and irrevocable curiosity. 

"I'm guessing there's no reason to question your tendency towards infidelity, is there Thomas?" She asked with a wry quirk of her brow as Tom leaned heavily against the railing with a bemused expression written across his features.

"I never thought that it was a question of infidelity or not, Justine. You were pretty good at pulling down your pants for anyone in the freakin' neighborhood as long as you got something out of it." Tom remarked smoothly as Justine shrugged as if the comment didn't faze her in the least.

"What can I say? It's the charm of womanhood. Wantonness can get you to incredible heights. But you know all about that don't you, Tom?" Justine asked as she took as step upwards toward Tom—grinning mischievously as she watched him take a very big, very audible step backwards away from her.

"I'm not interested in anything you're selling, Justine. Sign the papers I gave you and go home." Tom said in a menacing tone as Justine leaned in closer to him, bringing her mouth close enough to his ear that he felt the slight breeze from her breathing as she exhaled.

"Does _she_ know the rest of your secrets, Tom? Is love really strong enough to conquer all?" Justine whispered ferociously watching in satisfaction as Tom winced at the accusation. Backing away with little bravado, Justine threw her arms up in the air as she stepped toward the front door.

"Because, all in all, I don't think it is." Justine said with a wry shake of her head as she walked over to a candy dish sitting near the entrance—grabbing a piece of peppermint and popping it prettily into her mouth before waving nonchalantly at Tom and stomping out the door.

"Ta Ta." She murmured as the door slammed behind her—leaving a harried looking Tom Quincy still standing on the stairs glaring at the back of the door with an unreadable expression etched across his features. Finally, he blinked—turning with slow deliberation back towards his bedroom only to stop in mid-stride when he found himself staring up at a terry cloth wrapped Jude Harrison leaning over the railing above, her eyes a mixture of emotions swirling in incongruous waves as her wet curls fell somewhat in front of her face—hiding most of her feelings away. Neither said anything. They just stared as thoughts ran like a train wreck through Tom's head. There were so many things that time just couldn't erase—the pain for him was still too very real.

A loud 'click' from behind him made Tom turn suddenly to see Sadie entering the house balancing a ton of bags over each shoulder.

"I brought real clothes for Jude and I to wear, courtesy of G Majors Studio." Sadie said with a happy smile as she paused suddenly at her first glance at Tom's frowning face. It was time to push his emotions aside again. He had gotten damn good at that over the years so he looked back at Sadie and did the one thing he knew would keep her from asking questions—he smiled before turning to look upward again only to find that the spot where Jude had been standing before was now empty.


	38. Chapter 38

I had to get out of here. There was just no if's, and's, or but's about it. I needed space to think—to figure things out, and I really didn't think that I was going to get that opportunity as long as I was anywhere near Tom Quincy's vicinity.

A rustling noise outside the door had me almost scurrying like a frightened mouse into the corner of the room as Sadie's voice suddenly filled the silent space.

"I have some clothes for you, Jude." She said brightly as I just stared at the door numbly—taking several minutes just to register what she had said.

"Uh…okay great. Just leave them outside the door, okay? I just took a shower, and…hot dog, I have my voice back." I finished in amazement as I ran a hand over the smooth column of my throat. I was horribly and devastatingly hoarse, but at least I could speak again. A laugh outside the door clued me in to the fact that Sadie had heard me all too clearly.

"You might have it back, but you may not want to use it for a while. You sound like something out of a Freddy Kruger movie." She chuckled softly as I heard something 'plop' onto the floor outside.

"You can thank me later for the clothes, little sis." She said with a certain glibness to her voice as I finally heard her footsteps fading down the hall. Even minutes after she had walked away, I still sat there—staring into space, almost afraid to remove the towel because it had come to represent so much more than just a tool to dry off with. It was his—it was the garment that had brought us closer than we had ever been before, and that made it both comforting and tormenting at the same time. Why was I doing this to myself? I wasn't a child anymore. No, the past year of ups and downs had pretty much guaranteed my bumpy ride into young adulthood—probably even more so than most my age. I mean, geez, I wasn't all that much younger than Sadie, only by a couple of years, and yet everyone acted as if what she did was okay compared to the decisions that I made. Damn, I was just so frustrated with everything.

Finally, giving up the confusing train of thoughts that kept bombarding through my brain, I walked over to the door and dragged in the bag of clothes from the hallway while listening to the sounds of Tom's smooth deep voice and Sadie's high tinkling laugh from down below. I wish it were that easy for me to just forget, but my brain just didn't work that way. Far from it.

Peeking into the bag, I rifled through the items until I finally unearthed a pair of holy blue jeans and a red form fittingsweater with matching high-heeled boots. Geez, what was it with Sadie and heels. Hadn't she ever heard of tennis shoes? I shook my head back and forth in amusement as I looked over myself critically in Tommy's mirror before grabbing a brush lying on Tom's dresser—running it through the tangled mess on my head while thinking of ways to get away, just for a little while. A phone number stuffed in the corner of Tom's mirror caught my eye, and I almost gasped as a light bulb suddenly exploded in my head. Why not? Why the freakin' hell not? Grabbing the number off the mirror, I stalked over to Tom's phone with one determined tilt of my chin—refusing to allow myself to back down from my decision. The line rang incessantly before a voice carried over the empty space almost drowsily. I started talking animatedly, trying my best to get my point across despite the hoarseness dominating my tone.

"Jude…I don't know about this. Have you even thought this through properly?" He asked with a tone that emanated with uncertainty and dread. I just shrugged from my end.

"That's the problem. I need a place to think." I said as the line grew quiet with the exception of a few heavy sighs emanating from the other end.

"Look, I'll call you a cab. Just be outside to meet it, alright?" He said with a slightly hesitant tone as if he were afraid the step he was taking would be something he would later regret.

"Thank you." I said with a huge sigh of relief as I laid the phone back down in its cradle before slinging the bag of clothes Sadie had given me over my shoulder. Cracking the door open silently, I peered down the stairs quickly to make sure the way was clear before making a run for the door and a chance at resolution.


	39. Chapter 39

I watched the moisture that fogged out onto the night air from my exhaling breaths in fascination as I leaned over to pay the cab driver before thanking him and stepping away from the curb. Okay, so this was it. Looking around me curiously, I was actually amazed at the size of the quaint duplex that Kwest rented only a few miles away from the studio, and I suddenly felt my heart speed up in trepidation as I walked slowly over to the door that displayed a number '7' steadfastly in its center. I didn't even get a chance to knock before the door flew open to reveal a very agitated looking Kwest—shaking his head in visible denial as he took in a deep breath.

"I really hope you know what you're doing, Jude Harrison." He said in a low tone before pulling me unceremoniously into his home, and I almost laughed as I looked around at his very interesting décor. It was like stepping back into the 70's.

"Obsessed much?" I asked on a chuckle as Kwest shrugged before grinning at me sheepishly.

"The people that lived here before were your average new-age hippies, and they pretty much left the place furnished when they left seeking spiritual enlightenment or some such guru related wholesomeness. Anyhow, I kept telling myself I was going to redecorate, but it sort of grew on me somehow. I mean, what's more sexy than low lighting and lava lamps, right?" Kwest asked as I quirked a brow up at him sardonically. Uh huh, and I thought I was twisted.

"Peace to you, dude." I said while holding my fingers up in the universal symbol, and Kwest laughed as he walked over to a vividly colored orange armchair before sitting down.

"You really should think about not speaking for a while, Harrison. Your vocal cords sound like they've been in a very bad car wreck." He remarked with a small smile as he indicated the sofa across from him. I just shrugged before dumping my load on the floor and flopping down on his green couch lazily. I could tell he wanted to ask me something, and I dreaded the moment that I would have to answer because, truth be told, I wasn't even sure if I had an answer yet.

"He's got a lot of problems, Jude. None of them have anything to do with you, except maybe this inane fascination he's had with you since you first walked in as the new Instant Star." Kwest said quietly as I looked over at him with wide, expectant eyes. No, he was wrong.

"He isn't fascinated with me, Kwest." I said sorrowfully as I started picking at a piece of fuzz on the arm of his couch. Kwest just sighed.

"Now, you're just lying to yourself, Harrison, and that just won't do. I won't lie and say that I totally agree with this fascination of his, although I can see why it's there." Kwest said in a whisper as I looked over at him in amazement. Our eyes met as he shook his head vehemently.

"Now, don't go taking that statement out of context. I know how you are, Jude." He said with a laugh before bending over and placing his elbows on his knees. "I just mean that you are not that hard on the eyes, you're smart, you're witty, you have an emotional feel for people that can only be described as compassion, and you have this incredible drive to succeed at all costs. Top that off with all the passion you throw into your music, and it equals one hell of an irresistible temptation for him. Especially since the two of you seem to relate so well. God only knows, I've never seen a woman that could handle him better." Kwest remarked with a small laugh as he sat back again before propping his legs up casually on a stool at his feet. I just raised a brow up at him quizzically as he looked first up at me and then at the floor again.

"What's he hiding, Kwest?" I asked quietly as I stretched out across from him, laying my feet on the stool beside his. Kwest just shrugged before kicking me quickly in the shin.

"That's for him to tell you, Jude. It happened a long time ago, but he's reaping the consequences even today. It may be best for you just to let it go. It's not something that's hurting anyone now, and it's not likely that it's going to have any affect on the decisions he makes as we speak." Kwest said with a sigh as I rubbed gently at my shin before kicking him back. How come I never knew what a good friend Kwest was? Maybe, it's because Tom always kept him to himself. I could certainly see why.

"You're not going to say anything are you?" I asked with a small pout, batting my eyelashes at him as I he laughed before grabbing a pillow from behind his back and throwing it at my face. I caught it in mid-air before returning his grin with a self-satisfied feeling creeping over me. I needed this right now. Kwest's face suddenly fell as he looked over at me, and I knew without him even saying anything what he was about to announce.

"He isn't going to like that you left, Jude." Kwest said quietly as I just stared at him a moment in defiance.

"I only seem to be tormenting him by staying there. Maybe it's time for me to remove the temptation so that we can both think more clearly." I said in indignation as Kwest shrugged before standing up to walk into his small kitchen.

"I'm just saying that something tells me Tom likes the temptation you hold for him. He may fight it, but, all in all, the man revels in it." Kwest said knowingly as I stared at him aghast. Could he be serious? Oh, I hope he was.

"You thirsty?" Kwest asked helpfully as his phone began to ring demandingly. Both of us stared at the receiver in silence. Something told us exactly who it would be.


	40. Chapter 40

Kwest finally reached for the phone on the third ring, and I held my breath as he murmured 'hello.' It didn't take me long to realize we were both right to assume because I could hear Tommy's voice even from where I was sitting on the sofa.

"Tell me she's not at your place, man." Tommy said bitingly as Kwest sighed and turned away from me wearily.

"It was her decision, Tom." Kwest answered vaguely as I heard Tommy practically growl from across the room.

"She's sick for God's sake. What's she trying to do? Destroy her voice." Tommy asked as Kwest threw his eyes up in irritation.

"Oh come off of it, man. I may not do a very good imitation of the renowned Dr. House, but I can reasonably make sure she takes her medication, daddy." Kwest said with a humorous glance in my direction, and I smiled as Tommy sighed on the other end of the line. I couldn't hear the next part of the conversation as Tom must have lowered his voice, but Kwest suddenly turned away from me as if he didn't want me to see his face.

_**Tommy and Kwest…**_

"Bring her back, Kwest." Tom asked imploringly as Kwest glanced questioningly back at Jude, trying his best to be indifferent about the whole situation.

"What happened between you two, Tom?" Kwest asked in a whisper as he walked pointedly into his kitchen. Tom just mumbled incomprehensibly as he ran a hand wearily over his face.

"I might have crossed the line just a little bit." Tom said slowly as Kwest choked on a sip of Coke.

"What!" Kwest demanded before realizing that Jude could probably still hear him. Lowering his voice, he leaned into the refrigerator to grab some sandwich meat while taking slow deep, calming breaths.

"How much of the line did you cross just so I'll know what I'm dealing with over here, Quince. I am not Dr. Phil, you know. I don't do therapy for a living." Kwest remarked sardonically as Tom grew quiet on the other end before exhaling heavily.

"Let's just say it was probably a good thing we got interrupted." Tom said quietly as Kwest grew rigid at the remark.

"For you or for her, Tom?" Kwest asked deliberately as Tom banged around his bedroom in irritation.

"Are you trying to tell me I shouldn't have stopped, Kwest, because coming from you, I would almost find that laughable?" Tom asked with a wry quirk of his brow as he sat down on the edge of his bed uneasily. Kwest just sighed.

"I won't go any deeper into that emotional vortex so I'll just leave it at that vague insinuation, man." Kwest said as he looked over into the living room—motioning at the sandwich he was making as he did. Jude just shook her head at him while he shrugged in a gesture that said 'your loss.'

"Darius called." Tom said suddenly, veering away from the subject at hand as Kwest stared at the receiver in anticipation.

"And?" Kwest asked imploringly as Tommy's voice grew somewhat excited.

"Jude's name has been listed as a possibility for a Grammy nomination, but I don't think it would be wise to tell her right now. I don't want her getting her hopes up, but chances are, she will be selected." Tommy answered smoothly as Kwest turned away from Jude's searching eyes so that he could do a little victory dance on the tile of his kitchen floor.

"Now way, man! When was the last time you or I took one of our artists all the way to the Grammy's?" Kwest asked with a lightened heart as Tommy smiled happily before leaning over and stuffing a picture he had been looking at of Jude back in his nightstand drawer.

"A long time, friend. An awful long time." Tommy replied haltingly as Kwest tried not to chuckle at the possibility while Tom, on the other hand, grew quiet again.

"I'd like her to come back, Kwest. What am I supposed to tell Sadie?" Tom asked almost in a whisper as Kwest leaned against his kitchen counter wearily.

"Try the truth, man. As for Jude, maybe you should just ask her to come back. It can't be that hard." Kwest said knowingly as Tom sighed from the other end before standing back up and walking towards his bedroom door.

"That's easier said than done, Kwest. Bring her into the studio tomorrow. Even if her voice isn't up to par, we have publicity stills to work on. Oh and Kwest, I found a new song she wrote downstairs. Something tells me it's going to be a hit." Tom said vaguely as Kwest raised his brow uncertainly.

"Found a song, Tom? Let me guess, she didn't give you permission to peruse it, did she?" Kwest asked with a heavy sigh as Tom chuckled from the other end.

"When has she ever?" Tom asked with a small laugh as Kwest groaned.

"You two are seriously going to be the death of me, Mi Amigo." Kwest said despairingly as Tommy chuckled.

"What can I say? She's Sharon to my Osbourne." Tommy said teasingly as Kwest sighed. "_If only she knew that"_ Kwest thought with an amused shake of his head.

"Go get some rest, Tom. I'll bring her in tomorrow." Kwest said finally before looking at the receiver and hanging up the phone before Tom could reply. The Grammy's. Wow!


	41. Chapter 41

"You look pleased with yourself." I told Kwest with an interested raise of my brow as Kwest shrugged before sitting back down on his armchair and taking a huge bite out of his homemade sandwich.

"Yet another one of those things you're not going to comment on?" I asked in irritated amusement as Kwest chuckled lightly.

"Geez, you're nosy, Harrison." Kwest said with a private grin as I kicked him in the knee—watching as he choked on a bite of bread and ham before leaning over to rub his knee with a wounded expression. I just shrugged nonchalantly.

"That winsome little smile of yours is driving me nuts so I suggest you hide it from me unless you're planning on sharing what's so amusing." I stated sardonically as Kwest grinned again mischievously before standing up to walk around the back of the couch with a huge smile plastered across his face. I groaned as I realized his intention to annoy the hell out of me so I just stuffed my face into his couch pillow mumbling something about the defects of the human male race while Kwest laughed softly from behind me.

"You can relax, Jude. Besides, it may be best if we both called it a night. According to Little Tommy Q, and don't ever tell him I called him that, we're both needed at the studio in the morning." Kwest said with a sigh as I just stared up at him contemplatively.

"You're a good friend, Kwest." I said honestly as he walked around and grinned down at me self-importantly.

"I know." He replied with a smile and a shrug before walking into a hallway and returning with a blanket and a pillow—throwing them at me indecorously before stomping to his room with a grin.

"Try to sleep tight, Harrison." He said nonchalantly as I laughed at him merrily.

"As best I can in this Psychedelic room. I'm liable to wake up feeling like I'm tripping on something." I replied with a chuckle as Kwest threw me a friendly glare before closing his bedroom door in my face. I was still chuckling as I lay down on the sofa—sinking into my own thoughts as the night progressed. A lot of what Kwest had told me kept circling around and around in my head as I tried to sleep fitfully and when rest finally came, I dreamed of illicit things while Kwest's voice echoed through the fantasy _"He revels in it, Jude. He revels in it…"

* * *

_

I woke up grouchy and sore the next morning—not even speaking to Kwest as he sauntered into the room with a cheerful disposition, and he grinned as he realized I was SO not a morning person. It didn't help that he thought singing was something that would entertain me, especially when the singing was very loud and very off key.

"At least tell me you sound better in the shower." I said with a wince as he cocked a brow and handed me a very large mug filled to the brim with steaming java.

"Oh, bless you." I commented as he laughed seethingly before stealing the mug back and holding it over his head.

"Now what were you saying about my singing, Jude Harrison?" He asked humorously as I growled at him like a bear forced out of hibernation.

"That you sing like a friggin' nightingale." I said through clenched teeth as I grabbed ceremoniously for the cup. "Now hand me the caffeine, Kwest, or you're going to discover exactly where the girl from 'The Exorcist' learned her spinning head trick." I finished as Kwest laughed before handing me the mug in a white flag gesture.

"I'm thoroughly impressed by your people skills in the a.m." Kwest remarked before grabbing his car keys and looking at his watch pointedly.

"Ten minutes til I walk out this door, and I'm timing you. So, if you want a ride, you better run." He replied as I threw him a look before rushing into his bathroom only to emerge minutes later fully dressed in blue jeans, a black off-the-shoulder shirt, and black strappy heels to find Kwest staring at me in wonder.

"Now that was impressive." He remarked wryly as he looked down at the window of his watch in amazement. I just smiled.

"You should see me remove a bra from underneath my shirt." I stated cordially as Kwest choked on the coffee he was cradling like a beloved child in his hands. Ahhh, men are so easy to disturb. I stared pointedly at his keys as he tried to recover from his coughing fit.

"Am I driving, or are you because ten minutes ended about two minutes ago." I said as I walked haughtily out the door. Kwest shuddered as he followed.

"You are going nowhere near my wheels, missy. They may not be as fancy as Tommy's, but I still need them to get to work." Kwest said on a sigh as I threw him a look before climbing into his SUV. Geez, what was it with people letting me take their car keys. It's not like I had ever hit anything moving before. Not really.

The trip to the studio took only minutes, and I watched Kwest exit the vehicle with a raised brow.

"I think I'm just going to sit here a minute." I replied softly before glancing pointedly at Tommy's motorcycle. I guess he wanted to rest the viper for a little while. Kwest nodded in understanding before shutting the door and walking away. I waited for him to enter the studio before I climbed out and made my way to the alley—the same alley where every emotional turmoil that had taken place for me over the past year seemed to meet their peak. That should have been warning enough for me because before I knew it, I rounded the corner only to find myself face to face with Tommy's wife.


	42. Chapter 42

"Well, if it isn't Tommy Q's new main squeeze. Tell me, do you love him enough to marry him too because if we really wanted to, I bet we could start a fad." Justine replied sarcastically as she shrugged before leaning against the brick alley way in a gesture resembling anything but friendliness. I winced at her nasty tone as I strode over to her with a frown.

"I'm not anything to Tommy, Justine, so just back off. I don't know you well enough to knock you out on your ass so do me a favor and disappear." I remarked snidely as I tried to walk past her nonchalantly only to have her place her hand in a restraining gesture against my chest. I looked down at it menacingly before glancing up at her in warning.

"He's good in bed, isn't he? Makes up for that nasty side you never see. Really it does. Makes you forget all about the history he brings with him." She stated vaguely as I just stared at her in wide-eyed ignorance. She must have taken my clueless hint because she stared at me with loathing as she backed me against the wall of the alley—perusing me in disgust before laughing as if she found my very appearance amusing.

"You don't know, do you?" She asked as I just kept staring at her, trying my best to keep my temper under wraps as she laughed gleefully.

"Oh boy! How I love being the bearer of bad news!" She said with a small, maniacal dance before stepping up to me with a look of pure delight.

"You're not squeamish, are you?" Justine asked as she looked down at me imploringly. I just pushed her away from me forcefully, watching as she stumbled against the pebbled pavement before righting herself in indignation.

"I don't care what you know, Justine. I just want you to leave." I replied coldly as I brushed past her toward the door, trying my damndest to ignore her continued giggles.

"He chose a fiery one this time. Bet when you two are together, you explode." She remarked jovially as I glanced back at her scathingly before placing my hand on the doorknob. Big mistake. Her expression had fallen into a look filled with thoughtfulness as I started to turn the knob.

"He killed a man." Justine stated suddenly, and I felt my fingers go instantly cold as her statement registered in my head—slipping off the doorknob unheeded as I stared numbly at the brick wall in front of me. He what?

"What?" I asked haltingly as I turned around slowly, trying my best to hide my shock as another voice invaded the small space that, for me, had become a suffocating prison.

"I killed a man." Tom stated flatly as I turned around to find him leaning casually against the end of the alley—watching the whole scene with hard, cold eyes.

"Go on, Justine. Fill her in on all the juicy details since you seem to be so very well informed." Tommy declared in a voice so flat that it even made me shiver. And in that moment, I felt my whole world being condensed into a single minute filled with shock, curiosity, and anger. But never doubt. Because there was one thing I knew without question. There was no way Justine was telling the truth.


	43. Chapter 43

**_Author's Note: Wow you guys! The reviews were amazing. And also the reason I keep going with this story. I love them. Big shout outs and hugs thrown your way. I knew when I wrote the last chapter that it was shocking, but I wanted to pretty much go into more depth into Tommy's character and why he is the way he is. I think you'll like where I take it, but don't take my word for it, Read and review and please let me know what you guys think because that's what it's all about. Smiles._**

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* * *

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Justine looked over at Tommy uneasily before smiling once again at me with a tart expression intending, I guess, to make me feel less important because of my ignorance—as if she and Tom shared a bond that no one else could understand. Damned if I was going to let her do that to me.

"You're insane." I stated point blank as Justine raised a brow in something resembling a mix between irritation and amusement before glancing back at Tom incredulously.

"Did she just call me crazy, Thomas?" She asked in false bewilderment as Tommy quirked a brow nonchalantly.

"And I'd say she wasn't half off the mark." Tom stated dryly as Justine threw him a piercing glare—giving me the impression that if looks could kill, then Tom would be one miserable pile of ash right about now. Either way, I could care less. I had known Tom for a little over a year and, even though there were things I was just discovering about him that I hadn't known before, I wasn't the least bit fazed by it because there was one thing I did know for certain. Whatever he had done in the past was just that—the past. It was not the man he was now, and that's the man I cared about. Loved if I was really being honest with myself.

"I don't want to know." I said suddenly as Tommy and Justine both turned toward me in surprise.

"What?" Justine asked so flabbergasted that I actually felt a small spark of satisfaction out of stunning her. Tom just looked over at me quietly—perusing me with those unreadable eyes in a way that made my toes curl and my hair straighten.

"I don't want to know." I said again as I stared first down at the ground and then back up at them again. Some things were just better left buried.

"You trust him that much?" Justine asked cynically as I looked over into Tom's eyes calmly before facing Justine stoically—letting my eyes speak for me as I stared unblinkingly in her direction.

"Enough to know that he's kept it from me for a reason. That's good enough for me." I said with a slow shake of my head before turning back toward the building with silent resolution. I was trying _so so_ very hard not to let my curiosity get the better of me.

"What if I told you that the man he killed had a child?" Justine asked bitingly as I froze again, letting the information absorb into my brain securely before discarding it again. I wasn't going to let her get the best of me. I just wasn't. My hand closed over the doorknob securely just about to turn it for a second time that day when Tom's warm, large hands suddenly closed over mine gently—pulling me away from the enclosure before leaning forward enough that his mouth almost touched my ear.

"You'll always wonder if you walked away now, Jude." He said in a low tone as Justine laughed from behind us.

"Confessing are we, Quincy?" She asked as both Tom and I turned to her in aggravation.

"Shut up, Justine!" We both said in unison as Tom moved in front of me quickly before leading me over to the stairs of the fire escape where we had kissed on my sixteenth birthday. Talk about a place created just for stunning realizations. I wasn't one for fidgeting, but right now I was just one plain, very mixed up nervous wreck. There was no turning back now, no placing my hands over my ears like a fitful child yelling that 'I just wanted things to remain the same.' Because it was too late for that. Tom just looked at me sullenly.

"I was just about to turn nineteen, Jude. My best friend and I were being idiots—celebrating my impending birthday by drinking way too much—by canvassing for women…." Tom continued as Justine paced in agitation in front of us.

"You liar!" She yelled as Tom glanced up at her coldly.

"I loved him like a brother, Justine, but he wasn't as perfect as everyone wants to make him out to be now that he's gone. Even his wife knows that." Tom answered coolly before turning back to me with tired looking eyes.

"His name was Jonathan. He was married with a baby on the way, and while I was going through my rebound phase after Portia, he was looking for a way to forget his fears about discovering his wife was pregnant. So we did what any stupid, red-blooded male would do—we got wasted, we had a few women, and then we got into a car. Jon had wanted to drive, but I argued with him until eventually we decided to make a decision by flipping a coin. When we kept dropping the damn thing because we were too drunk to hold it, we did rock, paper, scissors instead, and I won. A stupid game, Jude—that's all it took to get me into the driver's seat." Tom said quietly, faltering slightly as Justine kicked at pebbles on the pavement in anger, letting the loose debris rain on us as he flung her a look of despair. I was missing something in that look, and I wondered belatedly if I really wanted to know what. Tom took a deep breath before running a hand wearily through his hair.

"The roads were fine that night—no rain, no roadwork, no dangerous curves. I was just drunk off my flippin' ass and that was all it took. One wrong swerve into the wrong lane, and an oncoming car smashed into the passenger side of the vehicle causing me to spin off the road before flipping three times." Tom relayed as my body grew numb when his tone lowered painfully.

"I was frozen in shock and pain. Breathing hurt, and I didn't find out until later that I had broken over four ribs and slightly punctured a lung, but all of that didn't matter when I turned to look for Jonathan only to discover he wasn't moving. I reached for him, placed my hand against the side of his neck praying for a pulse—desperately looking for some way to bring him into consciousness, but there was nothing. I was screaming when the police showed up, and it was almost like some twisted dream—watching as the paramedics worked on him before finally calling his time of death." Tom continued as I felt my heart literally break at the pain I saw radiating across his face. I could tell he still blamed himself for the whole accident. Hell, I think I would have too if it had been me. I tried to reach out and touch him but he shook his head at me instead.

"Don't, Jude. Not now." He murmured before looking over at an irritated Justine sadly. "I didn't go unpunished, Jude. No, I spent six months in prison before being let out on parole. My publicists kept it all hush hush by saying something about me being sent home on family business, but I wasn't the same after that. It was part of the reason I found it hard to keep performing with Boyz Attack. After that, I spent years trying to make up for it—being with his wife when their baby was born, and basically spending a good deal of time and money making sure that child grows up not wanting or needing anything." Tom finished as I just sat there staring between the two as Justine growled vehemently. So that's why he disappeared for days at a time. That's why he found it hard to perform the more shallow music from his band days—leaning now towards lyrics with power and depth. Damn, it explained so much.

"He's good at making you feel sorry for him." Justine stated caustically as I glanced down quickly at the ground before seeking her gaze determinedly.

"And how do you fit into the whole thing?" I asked with a quirk of my brow as Justine glared at Tom before looking over at me with a look of hatred.

"I'm Jonathan's twin sister." She stated as a wave of pain flitted over her features as I took in a deep, astonished breath. Oh my God!

"Are you trying to tell me…?" I began as Tom interrupted delicately.

"That she coerced me into marriage by making sure I was incapacitated and then refusing to divorce me." Tom replied as I looked at Tom and Justine in shock as a sudden realization suddenly clicked in my head. Dear God! That's what Kwest had meant when he talked about Tom's haunting past—about him even being assigned a guard to always make him feel as if he were in prison. I looked over at Justine with a look of awe.

"Marriage is your vengeance, isn't it?" I asked as mildly as I could as Justine stared at me silently while Tommy just sat there as if this whole ordeal had drained him. Wow! This was way beyond complicated, it was downright messed up.


	44. Chapter 44

I felt like an intruder somehow—like a burglar that had managed to get a sneak peek at someone else's life, and I was floored by it. I couldn't compute it—couldn't register the thought processes that swirled like jelly through my head as I just glanced back and forth between the two again and again in a dizzying dance of 'Wait! I'm still trying to catch up here." I just didn't know what to say. There were no words for it. Just pain—unending pain that spread throughout my gut as I tried again to reach out and touch Tommy, but, once again, he pulled away before shaking his head.

"It's not you." He whispered as I nodded in understanding. No use letting my feelings get hurt when I knew that rehashing those memories had brought back a lot of pain he needed to process alone. I could deal with that. Avoiding Justine's gaze, I looked down the alleyway deep in thought just about the same time that the back studio door opened with a 'bang.'

"Tommy…Jude…you're needed in the studio." Kwest said nonchalantly while looking down at a tablet of paper he held securely in his hand. Glancing up suddenly, he froze at the sight that met his eyes, and I knew by the way his pupils darkened that he realized what had just transpired.

"Maybe I should give you guys a little more time." Kwest remarked softly, but I just shook my head slowly before standing up and brushing the dirt off the back of my jeans. It was time to return to reality.

"I think we've had enough time." I said before holding my hand out to Tom in a gesture that said 'I'm not going anywhere' while glancing over my shoulder at Justine.

"I also think you're done here." I stated firmly as she gaped at me like a friggin' fish that had been out of the water way too long.

"Who are you to tell me…" She started vehemently, but I interrupted her smoothly while glaring pointedly into her eyes.

"They call me the Instant Star. When I see your name up in lights, I'll give you a chance to elaborate more. Until then, we have to get back to work so if you'll excuse us." I remarked steadfastly as I felt Tom's hand suddenly settle into mine. The connection meant so much to me, and I squeezed his fingers tightly as a brush of wind alerted me to the fact that he had stood up. It's a powerful thing what a simple brush of someone's fingers up against your own can mean. For me, it meant that he was willing to let me close enough to him to share his pain. And God, I wanted to.

Kwest nodded to us as we moved past Justine into the building, and I allowed myself only one glance backwards before letting the door slam in my face realizing as it did that, no matter how much I hated it, she was still his wife. She still used his last name. I felt her pain. Really I did. I couldn't imagine ever losing someone I really cared about in that manner, but it didn't excuse vindictiveness. By digging her claws into Tommy, she was only prolonging both of their pain because, by not letting go, neither of them were allowed to heal. Who knows? Maybe that was her plan.

It wasn't until I had gotten halfway into the studio that I noticed something very very fishy was going on. Tom let his hand slide inconspicuously out of mine as we noted, with gaping mouths, that the entire staff and crew of G Majors Studio were lined up along the walls as if we were marching by in some kind of strange, festive parade complete with a cake and a ton of balloons. I shrugged in confusion.

"Did I miss the memo about a birthday?" I asked with a winsome grin as Darius marched up to us with a huge smile plastered across his face. Now, I don't know about you, but when Darius smiles, it scares me. It's a new phobia I've managed to develop without any fanfare. Hmmm, I wonder if they have therapy for things like that. Anyway, I basically found myself staring in confusion at Darius as he patted Tom and Kwest on the back in congratulations.

"Well, it's official." He stated as I looked from one face to another before shrugging in irritation.

"What's official?" I asked as Tommy turned to me with a small chuckle—almost as if he couldn't believe what Darius had just announced.

"Damn!" He said suddenly before blinking as if processing the information slowly before grabbing me by the shoulders and shaking me excitedly.

"Jude, you've been nominated for a Grammy award. You're going to the Grammy's." He stated suddenly and with such excitement that I found myself laughing in joy with everyone else—reveling in the information until it finally clicked in my head what he had just said. Oh my God! I just froze—looking around the room in one slow, amazing sweep of the area before doing the only thing I could think of at the moment. I screamed.


	45. Chapter 45

Glass could have shattered from the excited yelp that escaped my larynx, and Tommy had to place his hand over my mouth to keep me from repeating the entire episode.

"Don't forget your vocal cords are not completely up to par yet, sweetheart. You do actually want to be able to perform at the thing, don't you?" He whispered on a chuckle as I rolled my eyes up at him before pulling his hand away from my lips and squealing again—only a little lower this time. Oh my God! This was unbelievable. Absolutely unbelievable! Looking around, I took in my surroundings in a daze—squinting at the two cakes that smiled up at me (literally because Darius had obviously gotten smiley faces put on them) as I sighed in tremendous satisfaction. Wait! Hold on a second.

"There are two cakes here, D. Why two?" I asked suddenly as my gaze landed once again on the large masterful confections as Darius cocked an eyebrow in amusement.

"I was wondering how long it would take you to notice? And I'm glad you asked." Darius stated cryptically before turning toward Tommy with a grin.

"Congratulations Quincy! You've been nominated for Producer of the year, the non-classical category." Darius finished as I felt my jaw drop in awe. Oh, if only I had it in me to scream again! Nobody said anything as Tommy just stared at Darius disbelievingly.

"You're kidding me right?" Tom asked almost in a whisper as I jumped up and down beside him in glee, holding my hands over my mouth in order to keep myself from laughing and crying all at the same time. How poetically right everything just seemed to be at the moment! Tom just gaped for a good five minutes before he finally managed to process the idea enough to be able to look around the room without drooling. He caught my gaze, and I held up my hands in a gesture of wonder and excitement before opening my arms up to him for a hug. He didn't need to say anything—all he did was rush forward and pick me up off of the ground before swinging us both around and around in one joyous sweep of the room.

"We did it." I whispered in his ear as he set me down slowly—gazing at me a moment with a small smile before turning back towards the room at large and throwing his arms up in a salutatory gesture.

"Well, what are we waiting for? Let's celebrate!" He yelled as everyone whooped and hollered before rushing towards the cake and sodas while talking a mile a minute amongst themselves. I watched as everyone ran around congratulating each other, because, all in all, it had been a team effort and the whole studio was proud of the nominations. It reflected well on all of those involved. Lord knows, I couldn't have done it without any of them, especially Tom. I searched him out amongst the flashing faces, grinning as I finally caught sight of him amidst the chaos—waving at him over everyone's heads as he looked back up at me with a merry twinkle glistening in his eyes. It was good to see him smile. God only knows, the flash of those pearly white teeth did amazing things to my insides. My face fell as a wave of desire sucker punched me in the gut. He must have felt it too because the next thing I knew, neither one of us were smiling as we just gazed at each other—letting everything-the noise, the conversation, and the smiles-fade into the background like white noise on a television set. I just couldn't look away.

"God Jude! I'm so very proud of you." A voice said suddenly from behind me, and I turned quickly, breaking contact with Tom, to see my dad standing there with a bright smile radiating from his face, and I practically glowed at the praise before throwing myself into his arms happily.

"Can you believe it?" I asked as I pulled away long enough to look up into his eyes with an excited smile. I suddenly felt like a kid standing in the center of a candy store reveling in the fact that my parents just told me I could select whatever I wanted. He grinned down at me before handing me a dozen red roses.

"For my Instant Star." He said softly as he hugged me one final time before holding me away from him and perusing me like a concerned parent.

"Are you doing okay? Do you feel better? Are you still happy about where you're staying?" Dad asked imploringly, and I laughed at his bombarding questions as I patted him reassuringly.

"Yes, yes, and yes." I answered with a laugh as he nodded quickly before turning around to look for Sadie. I wished him the best of luck in this crowd. Laughing, I turned away too only to come face to face with Tom Quincy.

"Are you happy where you're staying?" Tom asked quietly.


	46. Chapter 46

I couldn't answer him—just peering up at him with an expression that spoke volumes. He smiled as if he understood before pulling a small notebook from behind his back in a ceremonious gesture.

"I think I've found our next hit." He replied quietly as I just gaped up at him in both shock and horror. Really, I had had enough surprises for one day. What was he doing with that? I grabbed at it, but he only held it away from me before grabbing my chin firmly between his fingers.

"It's got potential, Jude." He remarked with a wave of his hand as I lifted my eyebrows up at him warily.

"It's not even finished. At least I don't think it is. Damn, it's a really rough draft." I said softly before finally gripping the spine of the book only to jerk it away from him a little too roughly. He quirked a brow knowingly.

"It's powerful." He stated so quietly I almost didn't hear him. There was a lot of insinuation in those two words, and I stared up at him whimsically as a voice behind us caused us both to turn around simultaneously.

"I guess congratulations are in order." The voice said cheerfully, and I felt my mouth fall open as my face turned red with indignation. It couldn't be. I just stared at her a moment numbly before glancing at the floor at my feet to disguise the pain I know reflected in my eyes.

"Victoria." I stated simply as mom sighed heavily in front of me.

"Jude…" She began as I shook my head vehemently.

"No mom, don't." I said firmly before smiling tightly up into her face. "I appreciate the show of support, and I don't hate you, I…uh… I just need time okay?" I said simply as I watched her face fall in an expression filled with hurt, but it was no more painful than what dad, Sades, and I had been through recently. No more so at all. My breath caught painfully in the middle of my throat as I looked over at her one final time.

"Mom it may be best if you left." I said as gently as I could, ignoring the gasp that emanated from Tommy behind me. But I needed them both to understand why.

"Dad and Sadie have not taken what happened well, mom. It may cause problems you might want to avoid. Please, if you have any compassion left, don't do this to them right now. They're still trying to get used to the idea of you being married, mom. Not to mention that you sold the house and started over without us. Please understand that and give them more time." I practically begged as I felt Tom's hands edge onto my shoulders in silent support. Mom just stared at me a moment sorrowfully before nodding in understanding.

"Just please don't hate me, Jude." She murmured before leaning over to give me a quick hug. I felt tears burn the edges of my eyes as I patted her back gently.

"I wouldn't know how to hate you, mom." I replied in a whisper as she nodded before turning away with tears in her eyes. I watched as she disappeared into the crowd—helplessly keeping an eye on her destination while holding my breath until she finally reached the door. She glanced back at me only once with uncertainty before turning the handle and walking away. Again. Only this time, it was for the best. At least I knew she still thought about us. That was enough for now. I heard Tom sigh from behind me as one of his arms edged around my waist, and I leaned into the comfort he was offering as his lips brushed slightly against my ear.

"One step forward and then two steps back huh, Harrison?" He asked as I shivered slightly, feeling the hairs on the back of my neck stand up at attention as my back pressed into his chest. I knew he was talking about our constant ups and downs, but at this point, I wasn't going to let the 'downs' get in our way. Placing my hand over the hand he had at my waist, I looked up at him with a wry quirk of my brow.

"We're going to the Grammy's, Tommy. Together." I said with a small smile as he smiled back at me gently.

"Well, if this isn't cozy." A voice said sarcastically in front of us, and I groaned as I glanced up in trepidation to find Tom's absolutely aggravating wife standing in front of us. Where was David Copperfield when you needed him? I could really use lessons on how to master his incredible disappearing act. Tom just sighed from behind me. His arms fell to his side as he balanced on the balls of his feet impatiently.

"It was getting there." He remarked vaguely as Justine threw him a haughty glare before smiling prettily at us both while handing a stack of worn looking papers over to Tom with a grimace.

"What's this?" Tom asked suspiciously, narrowing his eyes at the written script before looking up at her in stunned disbelief.

"What the hell?" He suddenly roared, lowering his voice as he realized he was drawing a crowd. Justine just grinned.

"It's amazing what persistence will get you." She said with a defiant tilt to her chin as I looked over Tommy's shoulder curiously, feeling my body go cold as I deciphered the delicate script.

"I'm not reconciling with you, Justine. There's no chance in hell." Tommy spat as she just looked up at him sweetly.

"If you'll read over that again, Tom, you'll notice that you don't have to. You just have to appear as if you're trying." She replied shortly. Tom narrowed his eyes perceptibly.

"You're not living with me, Justine." He stated matter-of-factly as Justine shrugged.

"Yeah, I couldn't seem to get the judge to agree to that part either, but since the separation was your idea and not mine, he did agree that I should be allowed a chance to, I don't know, win you back per say, so he pulled a couple of strings and got me a very interesting job as your personal assistant." Justine remarked primly as Tom's jaw dropped open ceremoniously.

"I don't even rate an assistant, Justine. It's not a part of my job description." Tom countered as Justine looked over her shoulder at a sour looking Darius.

"You do now." She replied with a small smile before turning around and fading into the crowd.

"Some higher power really hates me." Tom muttered as I looked over at him sympathetically.

"You really believe that?" I asked as Spied suddenly materialized in the place that Justine had just vacated.

"Oh yeah." Tom answered me sarcastically before raising a brow at my ex-boyfriend. Spied just smiled as winsomely as he could manage being faced with the man he would forever seem to loathe.

"I've got a proposition for you, Quincy. Why don't we talk mano y mano?" Spied asked as I raised my brow dubiously. Oh, this ought to be interesting.

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**Author's footnote: Hey guys! Hope you are still reading. Wow things are really rolling. I just noticed the amount of chapters I now have, and I think it's mainly because my chapters are so much shorter than they were in my other fan fics. If condensed it wouldn't be so long. Really thought about spinning it off so that it wouldn't be so thick, per say, but, at this point, I haven't found a stopping point to do that at. Let me know if you guys mind the accumulating chapters. If so, I'll find a way to spin it because I still have the Spied and Tommy venture, the Grammy's, and a few other poignant moments dealing with Kwest and etc. Please R&R and throw in your two cents. Will be holding my breath in anticipation of your replies. Oh and let me know what you think of the story too! I live for the reviews since I found this site! You guys are so great! Smiles. Angel.**


	47. Chapter 47

_**Tommy and Spied…**_

Tommy followed Spied into Studio 1 warily, looking over at him with a raised brow before closing the door with a resounding 'click'—wishing desperately that there were some way to do this 'little' meeting somewhere more public. As it was, Tommy was not about to hold himself accountable for any actions that transpired from within.

"What do you want, Spied?" Tom asked before leaning casually against the door and crossing his arms across his chest impatiently. Best to stay as close as he could to the nearest exit. Spied just quirked a brow irritably.

"You really know how to make a guy feel comfortable, don't you Q-ball?" Spied asked sardonically as Tom narrowed his eyes menacingly.

"Watch your step, Spied. I'm beginning to lose patience with the annoying people in my life. I think we managed to over-step the comfortable boundary after you started dating Jude. So let's just leave it at that." Tommy replied with a heavy sigh as Spied opened his arms in a 'whatever man' gesture.

"Show me what you have, Spied. Your 'devil may care' attitude doesn't speak well for its profit worth." Tom stated sagely as Spied grinned mischievously.

"You'd be surprised, Quince." Spied replied vaguely as he pulled a leaf of papers out of a folder before handing them to Tom with a grin. Tom just shook his head wearily. He was really becoming sick of legal looking papers.

"It's Quincy to you, Spied." Tom stated irritably before looking down at the papers he was holding gingerly in his hands. Oh damn! Tom pushed himself away from the wall hurriedly before glancing up at Spied and then back down at the papers again.

"And you're showing this to me because…?" Tom asked as Spied grinned when he realized he had more than caught Tom's attention. Tom looked at him imploringly as Spied shrugged.

"Because _she_ loves you and because I still care about her." Spied replied with a quirk of his brow as Tom sat down heavily on a nearby swivel stool.

"You know what this means, don't you?" Tom asked as he looked over the figures for the hundredth time. He may not have finished high school, but he knew exactly what fraud looked like. Spied just shrugged again.

"I don't know, TQ. What do you think it means?" Spied asked sarcastically as Tom threw him another scathing look before narrowing his eyes menacingly. Spied threw his hands up in the air in capitulation.

"Okay. Sorry man. Just pointing out that I know the importance of this as much as you do." He said quietly.

"Jesus!" Tom stated under his breath as he read the figures yet again.

"Darius, or someone in this office is over-drawing funds from G Majors. The Freakin' studio could fold." Tommy mumbled as Spied raised a brow knowingly.

"I knew you'd get the picture. I don't know whose doing it, and I probably never would have stumbled on those papers if the guys and I hadn't played that prank on you at the cocktail party a while back." Spied remarked as Tom looked over at him calculatingly.

"And what does that have to do with us?" Tom asked suspiciously as Spied shrugged.

"The studio will fail eventually if the rat involved keeps up his nasty work. What happens if we were there to catch its fall? We have talent. We know people with talent. Couldn't you just see us as the owners of G Majors." Spied asked seriously as Tom looked over at him in surprise. The childish prankster actually had ambition. Tom was impressed.

"I don't know, Spied, but it's worth looking into." Tom said as they both looked at each other meaningfully.


	48. Chapter 48

**Author's Note: Just four words: I LOVE you guys! Keep reading. The puzzle pieces will soon start to fall together and Tommy and Jude are about to explode. But first for a little comic relief and another little surprise. Please R&R.**

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**_Back to Jude who is now fidgeting at the soda counter… _**

"Hey Blondie! Lookin' for the Q-man or just a way to disappear into the woodwork for a little while because I think little gay dude here and I have discovered a way to really knock the place?" Patsy asked suddenly from behind me as I glanced over my shoulder at her and Mason before smiling at their antics.

"I don't know. What do you guys have in mind?" I asked curiously as Patsy raised a brow mischievously before holding up a ring of keys she had concealed in the line of fabric surrounding her bra. No friggin' way!

"There's no way that's what I think it is, is there?" I asked peevishly as Patsy quirked a brow before glancing at Mason who shrugged.

"Wanna bet?" She asked with such confidence, I just firmly shook my head. I had learned the hard way just how serious the girl could be. Geez, how did she manage to get Liam's friggin' house keys? I knew from gossip that Sadie had told me that Patsy had a new grudge against the guy for a demo he had trashed on a day or so ago before removing it from the studio. Something told me she was planning to make sure she got the damn thing back. I shrugged uncertainly before glancing uneasily up at the closed door of Studio 1, still confused as to why Spied would have wanted to talk to Tommy alone, before doing a quick sweep of the room—shuddering as my gaze landed on Justine's approaching figure. Oh, geez! Why the hell not?

"Let's go!" I said spontaneously as Patsy whooped while Mason looked us over as if we were both crazy.

"Oh you know you like it." Patsy said to him seductively as the three of us snuck out the back of G Majors.

"Ha!" He hrrrrummmpphed as I chuckled.

"He's just intimidated by the fact that we like it both hard, fast, and better yet, dangerous. No man could keep up." I said with a seductive wag of my brows as Mason choked on an incoming breath.

"Oh yeah. That's it all right, Harrison. Has nothing to do with the fact that what we're about to do could be considered a felony." He remarked sarcastically as I grinned over at a nonchalant Patsy.

"Look at it this way, Mason. If we get caught, we could always blame it on Patsy. Tell the authorities that she held a gun to our heads the whole time. I mean, it's not like that's a huge stretch of the imagination." I said teasingly as Patsy threw me a scathing glare. I shrugged in the all to familiar gesture of that universal question, _'what?' _Patsy only lifted a brow at me before pointing at the vehicles lining the parking lot.

"Which wheels guys? And be fast about it. We need to be back before the end of this soiree." Patsy asked as I stared at her with a gaping jaw.

"First off Patsy. I may have this unquenchable desire to see how the other half lives, but I do not, I repeat, do not have a death wish so let's just take your back-firing set of crumbling scrap metal." I replied before heading toward Patsy's vehicle. She just shrugged as Mason chuckled.

"And to think, I thought you were more daring than that Harrison." She remarked with a wry twinkle in her eyes as I just shrugged easily.

"What can I say?" I said casually before sliding into the passenger seat while Patsy opened the back door before shoving Mason in roughly and then rounding her own corner in order to slide behind the wheel. I arched a brow as she looked over at me winningly.

"I wonder if Liam has the stuff to make sandwiches. I'm starving." She replied as Mason groaned.

"Do your boyfriends have any idea what you two are up to?" He asked formidably as Patsy and I glanced at each other in amusement.

"What boyfriend?" I replied at the same time that Patsy answered, "Sure, he does," while Mason just stared at us both in fond amazement. What can I say? G Majors is made up of some irresistible characters. And that, in itself, is an understatement. Patsy drove in silence until Liam's house finally came into view, and she whistled at the sheer size of it. It wasn't huge, but it sure as hell was bigger than anything any one of us were used to.

"I vote we turn back around now. What do you guys say?" Mason reiterated nervously from the back seat as Patsy parked inconspicuously in the street. We girls just looked at each other simultaneously before smiling and climbing out of the vehicle in unison. No way we were backing out now. Slinking up the drive like the villains from some B rated murder mystery, we climbed laughingly over shrubs and hedges—picking Mason up a few times as he tripped over glass lawn decorations.

"Who knew Liam was so maternal." I remarked on a laugh as I pointed over at a small herb garden near what looked like the back kitchen patio. Patsy chuckled before pushing her way in front of me.

"Must be his inner sensitive side." Patsy said with a shrug before walking onto the tiled patio.

"Let's enter here." She announced as she jiggled the keys suggestively before inserting each one into the uncooperative lock until a sudden 'click' alerted us to the fact that she had hit jackpot.

"Oh God!" Mason muttered as we each grabbed one of his arms and dragged him in behind us. Wow! Liam really liked his place lit up. Almost the entire kitchen and dining room area was made up of large picture windows while his living room, through a door to the left, sported mostly tan décor.

"Do you have any idea where you're going?" I asked Patsy on a whisper as she shrugged uncertainly before pointing at a CD collection displayed along one wall in the living room.

"If it's anywhere, it's probably there." She answered, confirming my suspicion that she had come for her demo. Jesus! This was going to take us all afternoon.

"I hope he has those categorized because that is one of the biggest collections I have ever seen." I said in awe as Mason whistled softly from behind me.

"Damn!" He mumbled as we all looked at each other before rushing forward into the room to begin silently rifling through the monstrosity. We were halfway through the collected works when Mason sighed in obvious relief.

"I've got it." He stated while holding it up for us to see. "Now, can we go now?" He asked nervously as a loud banging noise above our heads caused us all to look up at the ceiling in alarm.

"Someone's here." Mason whispered frantically as Patsy rolled her eyes up at him.

"Wow Einstein. Nice observation. Think you could explain to us what E equals MC squared really means?" Patsy asked sarcastically before looking over at me with a raised brow.

"We should check it out." She remarked as I looked over at her in shock.

"Are you crazy?" I mumbled as she shrugged before heading over towards the stairs. Oh, come on! The girl seriously had the desire to see the inside of penitentiary walls. Why me?

"Wait! I'm coming too. We've already come this far. Might as well go down together." I said before pushing myself off of the floor and trotting quietly over to her—looking over my shoulder expectantly at Mason as I went. He groaned before finally getting up to join us.

"Just so you'll guys know. This is twisted." He whispered as we tip-toed up the stairs—listening carefully for the noises we had heard earlier. There they were again. Glancing over in the direction of a cracked bedroom door, I nudged Patsy and Mason as I pointed at it mouthing, "_I think it's coming from there," _before leading the way over to the entrance. Peeking through the crack, I felt my entire body go numb as I opened my mouth up to scream only to be stopped by Patsy's firm hand as she jerked me away from the enclosure before dragging my shocked body down the stairs and out the door. Oh My God! Mason was breathing hard as we finally reached the car, and he looked over at the two of us before breaking out into raucous, uncontrollable laughter.

"Did you guys see what I saw?" He asked as Patsy grinned while I just sat down heavily in the passenger seat, gripping the dashboard in a death hold as Patsy climbed in and started up the engine.

"Tell me that was not my sister." I remarked before looking over at Patsy with an _'I can't believe this'_ expression. Patsy had no sympathy.

"Yep, and a very naked, uggghhh, very active Liam." She said as another round of laughter started in the back seat. Mason was going to be weeping from his amusement by the time we pulled back up to the studio.

"Gives a whole new meaning to personal secretary." Patsy remarked before finally losing it herself. In the long run, I couldn't help it. I laughed too. And people hounded me about age difference. Oh my God!


	49. Chapter 49

**Author's Note: Okay, I had minor computer problems for a little while there but now fixed. I was scared I had posted my newest chapter three times, but I think I have it worked out. I need a new computer (laugh). Swiping forehead in relief. Please R&R.

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**

We arrived back at the studio as twilight began to fall, and I knew as we exited the car that no work was going to get done that day. Something told me everyone was just way too excited about the idea of going to the Grammy's. Hell, so was I. I looked over at Patsy as she stepped up to the entrance of the studio, and she and I shared a shuddering look as we remembered what happened earlier as Mason sidled up beside us.

"That was definitely one for the record books." He said with another laugh as we threw him an amused glance before finally popping through the studio doors. The party had all but calmed, and the people of G Majors was beginning to pack it in for the night. I looked around curiously for Tom, but when I didn't see him, I began another search for Spied instead only to come up empty a second time. Where were they? Jamie strolled up to us—stopping in front of us with a suspicious expression etched across his features.

"Where have you guys been?" He asked hotly as Patsy gave him a "_You're not my mother"_ look before shrugging and patting him on the back.

"We were shopping." She answered nonchalantly before waving her demo ceremoniously in front of his shocked nose. Jamie just gaped at it.

"You guys broke into Liam's house! Are you demented?" He asked as he shook his head before grabbing the CD from her hands. "Jesus, that's almost as bad as having Tommy's ex-wife hanging around the studio. Did you know she even propositioned me?" Jamie said with a wry quirk of his brow as Patsy's eyes narrowed menacingly.

"Do you mean to tell me she actually tried persuading you to have sex with her, Jamie. Because you know how I am about big words, and that 'proposition' thing is really starting to bother me." Patsy remarked as Jamie sighed as if hurt by the suggestion that she would think him that gullible.

"It's not like I took her up on the offer. Besides, I think she's mainly after information on Tom." Jamie said as Patsy grunted before placing her fingers up against the sides of her forehead in a gesture resembling that of a psychic you see at a carnival.

"Something tells me I foresee not so agreeable things happening for this girl." Patsy stated as I chuckled.

"Well, you won't get any arguments from me. You have my permission to torment the devil out of her." I said suddenly as I caught a faint glimpse of Kwest strolling towards us.

"Have you seen Tommy?" I asked Kwest quietly as he came to stand beside me. He just shrugged.

"I don't know. He and Spied are suddenly acting like two very misplaced spies off of a James Bond movie." Kwest remarked as I raised a brow up at him in curiosity. Kwest just threw his hands up.

"Don't give me that look, Jude. This time even I'm out of the loop." Kwest reiterated before dangling his car keys in front of my face.

"But he did tell me the offer for you to come back and stay with him was still open. Do you know what you're going to do yet?" He asked as I looked down at my feet—shuffling them nervously before looking back up at Kwest again.

"Just give me a ride to your place for now." I answered vaguely as he shrugged before standing back and motioning for me to go ahead of him to his vehicle. I waved a farewell to Jamie, Patsy, and Mason—trying my best to keep from snickering as Patsy held up her demo and Mason made kissing motions with his lips—before turning to walk back out the door again.

Climbing into Kwest's SUV for the second time that day, I noticed as Kwest glanced at me thoughtfully as I shut my door and buckled myself in securely.

"Are you okay, Jude?" He asked as I looked over at him questioningly.

"Why wouldn't I be?" I asked him in return as Kwest mulled over the question for a moment before shifting his vehicle into reverse and backing out of the parking lot.

"I heard about Justine, Jude, and I know you know about Tommy's past now. That's a lot to take in on one day." He stated simply as I watched his headlights bounce off the passing scenery.

"I'm fine, Kwest. Tommy blames himself for his past more than those who know him do. I think he's punishing himself more than we ever could. As for Justine, I read the papers. It's temporary. At least, I hope." I said with a sigh as Kwest chuckled from beside me.

"It should be. Tom has a lawyer looking into it even as we speak." Kwest stated firmly before looking forward at the road again. It had been a long day. Kwest pulled into the driveway of his duplex, and I just sat there as he turned off the engine and climbed out.

"I need a moment." I said as he stood outside waiting for me, and he just nodded before walking into his home. Sitting there, I glanced out at some rolling rain clouds gathering in the distance—watching in fascination as lightening ripped through the dark fabric of night, and I knew even without giving it much thought that, even if my head didn't quite agree with it, that my heart had made a decision. Gathering up my courage, I jumped out of Kwest's vehicle, ran into the duplex, picked up the phone and called a cab, before hugging a gaping Kwest, and rushing once again out the door. My decision was made.


	50. Chapter 50

**_Tommy and Spied…_**

"I'm not sure about this." Spied remarked suddenly as Tommy looked over at him with a raised brow.

"Hey, this was your idea, Bullwinkle, so do me a favor and help me out here." Tom remarked in aggravation as he tried his best to hold a flashlight and unlock a file cabinet door at the same time. Spied just threw him a look before shrugging in acquiescence.

"I still don't understand how this is going to help." Spied said warily as he looked around Darius's office with a quick shudder. The man really was intimidating and Spied had no desire to get caught. Tom just sighed.

"These cabinets include every financial statement and employee history created since G Majors opened its doors for business. If you want to find a rat, you smoke out their hole, right? Besides, if my suspicions are correct then I may know who's involved." Tom stated vaguely as Spied grabbed the flashlight and held it out so that Tom could maneuver the keys—pushing them into the locked drawer until it clicked.

"Bingo!" Tommy muttered before pulling out a group of manila folders. Spied squirmed restlessly as Tommy locked the drawer back.

"Are you sure Darius won't miss these?" Spied asked as Tommy looked over at him whimsically.

"Trust me, the only reports Darius looks over are the one's that get put on his desk, and obviously, these aren't going to be put there for a while." Tommy said with a shrug as Spied looked over at him thoughtfully before following him out of the office.

"Who do you think is behind it?" Spied asked as Tommy's expression suddenly went blank.

"Let's just say that if it is who I think it is, it may help me alleviate more than one problem in my life." Tommy said with a shrug as he looked down at the files. "But that depends on when these money incidences began." Tommy said suddenly as Spied raised a brow questioningly. Tom just shook his head.

"I'll just look at these tonight and let you know, okay? Besides, I'd like to talk to Kwest about this as well." Tom said quietly as Spied threw him a look, but at least he didn't argue with him.

"Whatever, man. Just do me a favor and run it by me before you take any action." Spied asked in a whisper as they each walked out to their respective vehicles. If only Jude wasn't this constant barrier between the two, Tom might actually be able to consider Spied a friend. Right now, he trusted Kwest more with his suspicions. Tom nodded at Spied before climbing onto his motorcycle—glancing up at the darkening sky with apprehension. He had to get home before the rain started.


	51. Chapter 51

**_A half hour later..._**

I just stood outside his apartment complex shivering—feeling the rain drip down the back of my shirt in cold rivulets as I stared. I knew he was home. I had watched as his motorcycle roared into the garage on the right side of the complex before pulling off his helmet and striding confidently into his home. And, even then, I hadn't approached him—just watching instead as the lights came on in his penthouse upstairs. The rain had started then, and I reveled in the cold feel of it, hoping that the frigidness would somehow knock some sense into me, but the only thing it did was make me cold.

I still felt as strongly about the current situation as I had before, but maybe I was just scared. Why wouldn't I be? I had never taken this final step with anyone before. The closest I had ever gotten to a boyfriend, and Tom and I weren't even involved, was when Spied and I were together, and, even then, I had usually shied away when things got too intimate. I can almost guarantee a therapist would have a field day with me.

Looking once more up at his glowing bedroom window, I took a deep breath, gathered my courage together, and walked toward the entrance uncertainly. _"Stop it, Jude."_ I kept telling myself over and over again as my pounding heart beat out a rhythm that matched remarkably the forceful steps I was taking up the stairs toward the elevator. Could I do this? Of course I could. I watched the lift doors open before me, and I sighed heavily before stepping onto it. The best thing I could do for myself right now was remember to breathe. Which, by the way, was something that I was having a remarkably hard time doing as the elevator opened—leaving me to stare at Tom's front door in uneasy anticipation. What was I doing? Should I knock? Finally, I just placed my hand on the knob and turned—shocked to find that it spinned easily in my hand, and I pushed it open ceremoniously before peering into the room. It was empty. I could hear the shower running upstairs, and I froze at what that implied. Talk about timing, Jude Harrison.

Closing the door behind me, I locked it before heading for the stairs—wondering as I did if Tom really even wanted me here. Of course he did. '_Quit with the doubts, Jude_,' I told myself quietly as I took the stairs slowly one at a time—staring at them as I went as if the steps were an insurmountable mountain waiting to crumble beneath my feet. Breathe.

I reached the top of my obstacle to find to my pleasant surprise that Tommy's bedroom door was cracked, and I peered into it like a friggin' peeping tom wondering as I did if I should knock or just call out, but my words froze in the back of my throat as my eyes met with Tommy's towel clad body as he sprawled lazily on his bed looking through a folder he had open before him. Oh, it was like a fire had been lit in my belly as I stared at the damp drops still clinging to his skin—falling to his waist sporadically to gather on the cloth towel sitting just low enough I could make out the faint ridge of pelvis below his abdomen. It was like he was a statue sculpted perfectly out of granite, and I was an art student just enjoying the form in its natural state. I shivered again as a breeze blew from his heater when it kicked on, and the door knob rattled as my hand shook with cold causing Tommy to look up in sudden alert. My gaze crashed with his, and for a moment, neither of us moved.


	52. Chapter 52

"Jude…" Tom began while straightening up slowly, glancing at the hallway behind me as if he couldn't figure out where I had come from. I just couldn't say anything—staring down instead at my sodden clothes miserably wondering, once again, if I was doing the right thing.

"I didn't think you'd come back." He said softly as I glanced back up at him with wide, expectant eyes.

"Neither did I." I replied slowly as my teeth chattered together loudly in the silent space. Tom stood up quickly, holding onto the side of his towel as he walked into his bathroom before turning on what sounded like the faucet of his Jacuzzi tub and I stood frozen as he walked back into the room and made his way over to me slowly.

"You're freezing, Jude." He said—stating the obvious as if he couldn't think of anything else to say. I just nodded mutely as he lifted my chin with his fingers, and I looked up into his eyes giving him a look that pleaded with him—for what, I didn't know. I still wasn't sure what I was doing yet myself. I just knew I had to be here—with him. Tom's pupils dilated and I licked my dry lips quickly watching with fascination as his eyes followed the movement before replacing the stare with his finger—outlining the skin of my mouth slowly as if mesmerized.

"Jude…" He mumbled desperately as I suddenly placed one of my cold hands against the skin of his chest—pressing there gently as he pulled my face to his—melding our lips together in one swift, ritualistic dance. I was floored—curling my toes into the material of my wet tennis shoes as I gripped at his arms—completely unaware of anything but him. A slight slick slap of my wet shirt made me aware that he was lifting it over my head, and I lifted my arms up in a helpful gesture—shivering as the air hit my already wet skin.

"You need to warm up, Jude." He mumbled against my lips as I tried my best to answer him as my body clung to his heat like a beacon. He chuckled lightly against my mouth as he pulled me up into his arms, cradling me, and carrying me as I protested into his bathroom before stooping down to turn off the water on the now full tub.

"Get in, Jude. It'll help." He said before turning away and walking out the door—closing it behind him as he went. I could have wept at his departure, but my body shivered instead as it remembered why it was in here. I stripped the garments off slowly-stepping into the water languidly—feeling as the heat emanated throughout my system, and I almost dozed as I lay there until a movement outside made me aware of Tom's presence, and I stood up slowly before wrapping a towel around me and walking over to the door. Cracking it open, I stared at him as he stood there in the middle of the room looking torn. He noticed me then, and I tried my best to smile past the tension that radiated between the two of us, but I failed miserably and I let my gaze fall to the floor sullenly.

"I want you, Jude." He said suddenly, causing my head to snap up furiously as I looked into his heated gaze in wonder. He didn't even smile—just shook his head as if it was something that really bothered him.

"God Jude…" He began as I pushed the door open hurriedly—stomping across the room in my towel in order to place the palm of my hand over his lips.

"Don't!" I cried desperately. "Don't say it!" I almost screamed as tears began to streak down my cheeks, and Tom shook his head hard enough that my hand fell off his mouth and back down to my sides.

"If we start now, I won't stop this time, Jude. You know what that means right?" He growled as his hands came to rest possessively on my bare shoulders. I sighed as one of his hands grazed my cheeks—brushing away the moisture that had gathered there, and I grabbed his hand before placing a kiss squarely in the center of his palm.

"Yes, I know what that means." I answered simply as I let my head fall back instinctively as his lips met once again furiously with mine, and I gasped as he pressed back against me—releasing the frustration and the fury that had been building up inside of him for over a year. And I met it fury for fury—collapsing as my knees went weak only to have Tom catch me before picking me up and pressing me into the fabric of his bed. His hand moved up my thigh and I held my breath as his lips settled near my ear in a strangled moan.

"I can't stop." He repeated again as if he needed me to understand that.

"Then don't!" I cried as he rolled us over before flipping off the light next to his bed.


	53. Chapter 53

I just laid there later listening to the beat of Tommy's heart as my ear rested against his chest—glorying in the fact that I was, if nothing else, connected to him now in a way that I would never be connected to anyone else. I gloried in it, but I also shivered at its implication. His hand suddenly sifted through my hair in the dark, and I glanced upward to find him staring down at me silently.

"Cold?" He asked quietly as I shook my head before closing my eyes languidly.

"Sore?" He asked again as I cracked one eye open before smiling up at him sheepishly.

"Maybe." I answered vaguely as Tommy chuckled, and I found myself tickled at the rumble that emanated against my ear from the laugh. This side of Tommy suited me. If only we never had to leave this place—this moment.

"This isn't going to change anything is it?" I asked hesitantly before turning so that my flesh rested more securely against his as I turned to face him more fully. Tom sighed before pulling at my hair affectionately.

"A little yeah." He said seriously as I felt my face fall at the unspoken implications.

"What do you mean a little?" I asked as I ran a finger down the line of his abdomen—totally fascinated by the fact that I could do that now and not feel strange about it. Tom shrugged as he grinned up at me with a mischievous glint twinkling in his eyes.

"I don't know. I guess it'll mean more late nights taking work home with me, and adding a few new exercise routines to my previous more celibate one." He said with a wry quirk of his brow as I stared up at him a moment—processing the illicit innuendo before chuckling and grabbing a pillow from behind my head, placing it over his face playfully.

"You are such a tease, Tom Quincy." I remarked on a laugh as he threw the pillow aside before rolling me over onto my back. I stared up at him wonderingly before running my hand slowly across his forehead and through the silky strands of his freshly washed hair.

"What about Justine, Tom? At this point, the only thing I am is an affair." I said as I lifted my brow sardonically—watching as several different emotions flitted over Tom's face.

"I'm working on that, Jude. There's things that I need to show to you and Kwest that might help eliminate some of our complications." He stated vaguely as I ran a finger down the bridge of his nose, laughing as he reached out and took it into his mouth.

"You're asking for it, Jude Harrison." He warned before smiling knowingly as I ran another finger just as knowingly down the line of his back.

"I'm trying." I replied saucily as Tommy laughed in what actually resembled genuine happiness.

"Exactly how sore are you?" Tom asked huskily as I shrugged one bare shoulder slightly before wrapping both my arms around his neck firmly.

"Not nearly sore enough." I quipped lightly as he growled slightly before pressing his lips against mine again, and I reveled in the tangle of our limbs as his breathing increased considerably.

"Your insatiable." He remarked as he nipped playfully at my ear lobe.

"Only for you." I said suddenly very seriously as Tom's eyes met with mine silently, and I could literally see his brain turning behind his eyes as he pulled my head up to his again before sliding me down enough we melded like two perfect puzzle pieces. I was as content as a cat lapping at a bowl of milk. I just hoped that this wasn't a product of a stolen moment—a nighttime dream that fades in daylight because this could be the one time I couldn't handle it if it did.

"Tom…" I suddenly gasped as he brought us both over the edge. It was no use denying it anymore. I was totally and utterly in love with Tom Quincy. God save my soul! Oh forget that! For Tom, I would have sold my soul to the friggin' devil!

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**Author's note: I couldn't help it. This chapter probably dipped more into the M rating than it did anything else, but I just wanted to stress the emotional level Tom and Jude just reached with each other. Especially since they have a lot they're going to have to deal with. What will happen when morning comes? How will life treat them now? Will it tear apart the fragile bond they're now developing or will it make it stronger?. Keep reading and reviewing guys. I post just for you guys. Lots of hugs and smiles. Angel**. 


	54. Chapter 54

**Author's Note: Aww you guys! I am so dedicating a huge author's footnote at the end of this story with shout outs and comments to you all. You guys really make posting this story every day worth it. I am so excited about tonight's episode. I can't wait to see what happens. Especially since I am nearing the close of this story before long. After that, I have a whole summer to write another epic (laugh out loud) because that's exactly what this story has become. Still the Grammy's and a few more surprises to come. Love you guys! Please R&R. Angel.

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**

Tom was quiet the next morning as I watched him getting dressed and every time he looked over at me, I closed my eyes—feigning sleep in order to avoid the inevitable confrontation. He was just so damn quiet. Pulling the blanket up to my chest, I squeezed the sheet so hard my knuckles turned white as I observed him leaning over to put on his shoes.

"Do you regret last night?" I asked him suddenly—watching as he jumped, startled by my sudden wakefulness. I didn't even blink as I stared up at him—afraid I guess that I'd miss even the subtlest hint of doubt should it cross his features. He sighed before turning slowly toward me, and I found myself mesmerized by the soft, gentle glint that shone in his eyes as he walked over to me—sitting down on the edge of the bed tenderly.

"Do you?" He asked in return before lifting a hand and running it down the side of my cheek lovingly. I just smiled at him smoothly.

"Never." I remarked stoically, and I meant it too. Tom grinned as he leaned over and threw one of his shirts at me.

"Better get dressed. We still have to run by Kwest's house and get your own clothes." He replied on a chuckle as I sat up and pulled the shirt over my head hurriedly—realizing as I did that he had never answered my question.

"Tom…?" I began as I looked over at his imposing back, highlighted by a shaft of light from the early morning sun. He shook his head slowly.

"I don't, Jude. Far from it." Tom interrupted quickly as I looked down at the Interpol print on the front of his sweatshirt.

"I'm okay with keeping it quiet, Tom." I said softly—wincing slightly at the sigh of relief that escaped his lips.

"It's not you…" He started as I stood up quickly—moving to stand behind him before placing my hands on his shoulders reassuringly.

"Don't. You don't have to explain. Really you don't. Believe it or not, I'm not that naïve. You're still married for God's sake. I know how the courts view that, and I won't let my selfish need to want to be publicly affectionate with you keep you from getting that divorce, Tom. So just don't." I stated primly before turning to look down at the floor for the stiff hard jeans I had worn last night. Kwest's house and my own clothes were starting to look really good about now. I had just stooped down to pick them up when Tom said it, and I looked at him as he stared back at me incredulously as if he had never meant to utter those words—as if he had lost his senses. The loud 'I love you' that had escaped his lips rang through the room between us, and I nearly had to sit down on the edge of the bed to keep from collapsing as it finally penetrated my fog-filled brain. He loved me. Tommy shifted then, and I looked over to find him hurriedly opening the door to his room—seeking escape of another kind.

"We need to go Jude." He remarked in a low tone as he swept from the room, and I listened as his footsteps faded down the stairway. Wow! I must have sat there a good five minutes before it registered that it was probably a good idea if I started moving so I ran around like a senseless chicken—scurrying to grab everything I would need to make it through the day before following Tom down the stairs—sighing as I saw him grab his car keys before motioning toward the door. Opening it for me, he suddenly looked curiously down his hallway before scrunching his eyebrows in concentration.

"Do you have any idea where Sadie is?" He asked as I choked on my own spittle—coughing to hide the laugh that bubbled up in the back of my throat.

"Somewhat." I answered vaguely as Tom lifted a brow before shaking his head despairingly.

"Something tells me that I don't want to know." He remarked as I grinned before leading the way into the elevator.

"No, you really don't." I stated jovially as he quirked a brow again before pushing the button that would close the view of his penthouse from sight only to re-open later facing towards the street and into the real world. How I dreaded that part—the real world.


	55. Chapter 55

_**Twenty minutes later…**_

Kwest opened the door of his duplex irritably only to pause in shock as he noticed Tom and I standing there stoically, and I felt myself blush as he looked over my disheveled appearance knowingly. Well, there goes discretion.

"Come on." He said quietly before ushering the two of us through the entrance. "Your clothes are in the bathroom, Jude." He finished as I nodded before heading over into the small room down his hall.

**_After waiting for Jude to enter the bathroom…_**

Kwest looked over at Tom in amazement as Tom fidgeted under the extensive scrutiny.

"Wow!" Kwest said suddenly as Tom nodded in understanding—leaning against the door jam as he did.

"That would be an understatement, man." Tom reiterated as Kwest sat down heavily on the end of his couch before looking up at Tom curiously.

"So I'm guessing that whatever assumptions I am making right now are all true, right?" Kwest asked—trying not to be obvious as Tommy shrugged before glancing down the hallway at the closed bathroom door.

"Yep, that just about sums it up." Tommy answered him vaguely as Kwest reached desperately for a cup of coffee.

"Wow!" He muttered again as he took a sip—looking up as Jude suddenly entered the room once more, this time dressed in blue jeans (her favorite item of clothing), a blue knit top, and strappy blue heels grumbling about how she really needed to go do her own shopping when time allowed. Kwest smiled at her as she smiled back before sitting on the couch next to him and patting his knee in a friendly gesture.

"So what did I miss?" She asked haughtily as Tom and Kwest just glanced at each other silently before shaking their heads in unison. Jude threw her hands up in surrender.

"All right fine. I won't meddle. I can always do that later after we leave the studio." She said with a mischievous grin as Tommy and Kwest both groaned before Tommy suddenly stepped forward—placing a manila folder in the center of Kwest's coffee table. Kwest narrowed his eyes suspiciously.

"What's this?" He asked before picking up the object—turning it over and over in his hand curiously.

"My curse and my salvation." Tommy answered vaguely as Kwest and Jude stared up at him questioningly.

**_Switching back to Jude POV…_**

"What do you mean?" I asked uneasily—glancing at the document Kwest was now perusing with uncertainty. Kwest just whistled as he looked down at the paperwork and then back up at Tom silently.

"You know what this means, don't you?" Kwest asked as he handed me the documents before standing up to pace the room. Tommy shrugged.

"Would I be here if I didn't?" Tom asked as Kwest stared at him a moment in uneasy silence. I was just confused. I didn't know enough about running a studio to know what the problem was. It was like deciphering Egyptian hieroglyphics.

"Then can someone explain it to me?" I asked in a small, uneven voice as Tommy looked over at me—allowing the hard look that had been in his gaze before soften as he stared at me.

"It means that I've been stealing money from G Majors Studio." Tom stated point blank—leaving the statement to fall over the room like the debris from a bomb. I was just flabbergasted.

"Excuse me. You what?" I asked in confusion as Kwest threw Tommy a _'take it easy' _look before sitting down next to me.

"It means…." Kwest began as he patted me gently on the knee before throwing Tom another '_you don't have to scare her'_ kind of glance. "That someone has been stealing money from the studio—sort of overdrawing funds by taking a little money here and there in such small amounts that no one has noticed, but now the fall in the income level is beginning to show that something is wrong. I'll bet you money that Darius already has an investigator hired to try and figure it out." Kwest explained softly as I shook my head slowly—still as confused as ever.

"okaaaayyy…and what exactly does Tommy have to do with this?" I asked as Tom suddenly walked over and sat down on the other side of me. I immediately felt safe then because I knew there weren't two men I trusted more than Tom and Kwest, except maybe my dad. Tom took my hand in his before looking down pointedly at the manila folder in my lap.

"Jude, Someone's been using my bank account to deposit the funds. I just figured I had gotten a pay raise when I first noticed the raise in my income, but when Spied came to me with this folder…." He left off chillingly as my eyes widened in shock. Of course, that's why Tom and Spied had been hanging out together. Besides, Spied definitely paid more attention in Economics class than I did. I had never made higher than a D. Tells you how much I know about revenue and other such shit. A sudden thought struck me.

"Spied…?" I began as Tommy shrugged before holding his hand up and finishing my sentence for me.

"Found this the night of the cocktail party, and if the figures are correct, then the money started disappearing from G Majors and entering my account about five months after I started working at G Majors." He finished quietly as I stared up at him a moment in shock. Okay, wait! Who would have access to Tom's account, and who hated him enough to get him accused of money laundering? Oh my God!

"Justine." I said suddenly as the guys looked at me a moment stonily—obviously aware, even before it had clicked in my head, who was responsible for it. I just felt numb.

"That's why she's back, isn't it? She's had this planned all along. She didn't return just because you had a girl on the side. No, she came back because she knew it was getting close to time to land you in federal prison." I said irately, all of sudden feeling like I was in some screwed up episode of Law and Order.

"What are we going to do about it?" I asked suddenly—peering up into Tommy's face as he squeezed my hand gently.

"I'm going to let Justine think I'm warming to her. The good thing about being married is that I have as much access to her accounts as she does mine. So what happens when the extra money from the studio disappears from my account and ends up in hers?" Tommy asked as I smiled when the realization hit me.

"She goes to prison and gives you that divorce." I replied as Kwest put one of his hands on my shoulder.

"Bingo." Kwest answered as Tom reached for his keys.

"You guys ride to the studio together. I don't want Justine to think Jude spent the night with me. I'm going to be a little late this morning. I have a bank account to clear. Fortunately enough for me, I have more than one account and more than enough money to be able to afford to do it. And if things work in our favor, then I'm hoping by the end of today, Justine will no longer be a problem for us." Tom said softly before leaning over to kiss me on the forehead gently.

"See you two at the studio." He remarked before walking out the door, flipping his phone open to call Spied as he went.


	56. Chapter 56

_**A few hours later…**_

I was sitting at the studio, strumming on my guitar when I noticed Spied staring at me from the side of the room.

"What?" I asked with a smile before rubbing at my cheeks self-consciously. "Is there something on my face?" I finished as Spied shook his head vehemently.

"No…you just seem different this morning." He remarked as I felt heat creep into my face. If only he knew how different. I just shrugged.

"No different than normal, I'm sure." I stated before strumming at the strings again—avoiding Spied's stare, mostly because I was afraid of what my eyes would reveal to him. The glow from last night was still way too new for me, and I couldn't hide it even if I tried.

"I talked to Tom this morning." Spied said suddenly as my body went numb with apprehension. Had Tommy said something to Spied about us? I looked up with a wary expression etched across my features.

"About the documents you found?" I asked quietly as Spied strolled over to me determinedly.

"Yeah." He said as he leaned in close to me, brushing the hair out of my face with one of his fingers. "And the rest, I'm kind of starting to piece together on my own." He stated almost in a whisper as I shivered at his tone.

"What do you mean?" I asked vaguely—staring down at my toes intently as if I would find the answer to my present situation written across my foot. Spied quirked a brow knowingly.

"When Justine gets caught, the two of you will be free to be an item, you know." He said suddenly as I squirmed uncomfortably on my stool. He leaned in closer. "But something tells me you two have already crossed that line, Jude. Tell me, was your first time all it was cracked up to be." He asked shortly. My head jerked up with a snap. He was hurt. I knew that, especially since he had so wanted me to choose him as the man I shared that special moment with. But I wasn't going to let him make me feel bad for my decision or for loving Tom.

"Spied, it would probably be best if you ended this topic of conversation now before we both say things we'll regret later." I stated warningly as Spied sighed in aggravation.

"Do you even know how hard it is for me, Jude?" He asked as he looked down into my eyes imploringly.

"More than you know, Spied, because I felt the same way when Tom was with Sadie." I replied as his eyes darkened considerably.

"I'm trying, Jude." He whispered mournfully as I laid my forehead against his gently.

"I know you are." I answered before smiling at him cheerfully.

"You'll never guess what happened to Mason, Patsy, and I the other day…" I began laughingly, knowing that as I told him the story, his mood would lighten considerably.


	57. Chapter 57

I finished telling Spied the story right about the time that Sadie decided to pop into the room, and the two of us just stared at her before dissolving into a fit of laughter. Talk about timing. Sadie frowned as she looked over at us, and I gasped in a desperate attempt to draw in air. Oh, laughing felt so good!

"Did I interrupt something?" Sadie asked sarcastically as I bit my lip to keep from laughing again.

"Nope, not at…all." I replied haltingly—tripping over my words as I giggled. Sadie just narrowed her eyes suspiciously.

"Get a room you two. Can someone please tell me why the feds are in the office right now?" Sadie asked sagely as I felt the blood in my veins turn to ice. Please say Tommy had finished his business in town. Jumping down off the stool, I ran over to the cracked door behind Sadie and peered out of it warily. Shit! Two men in black suits were talking animatedly with Darius as they motioned around the room at large. I only caught snatches of the conversation, but I did hear the word 'Quincy' thrown around more than a few times. Oh God, where was Tommy?

"How long have they been here?" I asked Sadie in a panic as she scrunched her eyebrows up in confusion.

"About a half hour. Why? What's going on here?" Sadie demanded as I just threw her a _"Don't worry about it"_ look before turning toward Spied. Spied shrugged in that _'Don't look at me' _kind of gesture as I took in slow, deep breaths—trying my best to keep my breathing easy and my heart beating normally. Sadie just shrugged before sighing heavily.

"How come I feel like I've missed something very important here?" She asked as I looked over at her nonchalantly.

"Maybe it's because you've been way too busy with Liam lately." I remarked suddenly—placing my hand quickly over my mouth as I realized what I had just revealed. Sadie's jaw dropped to the floor before her eyes narrowed menacingly.

"What do you know, Jude Harrison?" She asked as I perused her indifferently.

"Trust me. Way way way more than I ever wanted to." I answered on a gasp as she grabbed my wrist painfully.

"Don't say anything, Jude. Please." Sadie pleaded as I wrapped my arms around her shoulders.

"Now that's something you don't have to worry about, Sades. We Harrison women have a tendency to fall hard and fast for forbidden men." I said on a small laugh as she smiled at me tenderly.

"I guess we do, sis, don't we?" Sadie remarked as I looked over at her—startled by the connection we suddenly shared.

"If you ever need to talk about anything, Jude…"Sadie began as I held up my hand in interruption.

"I know where to find you." I finished for her lightly as she laughed before peering out the door curiously.

"Now do I even have to ask if Tommy's in trouble?" Sadie remarked as I sighed heavily.

"God, I hope not, Sadie." I cried as she hugged me to her quickly before placing her hand on the doorknob.

"I'm still your big sister, Jude. Let's see what I can't find out for you." She replied as I grinned at her. Where was Tommy?


	58. Chapter 58

Kwest suddenly walked steadfastly into the room with a slight smile on his face, and I jumped up hurriedly—grabbing him by the arm before shaking him resolutely.

"What's going on out there, Kwest? If I don't find out something soon, I'm going to have a nervous breakdown." I cried desperately as Kwest pulled me into a ferocious, '_It's alright' _hug.

"Breathe, Jude. Everything's going to be fine. How would you guys like to see some fire works—an actual real duel between Quincy and Quincy?" Kwest asked before motioning toward the door into the main entrance of G Majors Studio. "Because right now, Tom and Justine are literally facing off from opposite sides of the room with only the feds to mediate." Kwest finished as Spied and I looked at each other quietly before simultaneously heading out the door. Geez, Kwest wasn't kidding. The three of us edged into the crowd surrounding the pair, and I saw Sadie shrug at me in confusion as Justine literally exploded in rage—pointing at Tommy accusingly. I could tell that they had been at it for some time now.

"Have you checked his accounts because the money you're looking for is there, I tell you?" Justine retorted in derision as Tommy lifted a brow coolly—taking in a deep breathe while looking around at the faces of the studio's crew.

"You can't let it go, can you Justine?" He asked sorrowfully as she looked up at him angrily before kicking the floor with the toe of her shoe.

"Oh no you don't, Quincy! I won't let you psycho analyze me. I know that you killed my brother and that's enough for me. Now, why isn't anyone arresting that man? He's a fraud I tell you, and a murderer." Justine spat as the people of G Majors took in a shocked, collective gasp. Tommy just shrugged coldly.

"I can't go back in time, Justine. You don't know how much I wished that I could." He stated in a low tone as she threw her fist in the air—weeping frantically as tears streaked down her face.

"Just shut up, Tom! Take him!" She yelled frantically now, and I felt my heart break for her as she gasped in sorrow—her tears fading into mild hiccups.

"We checked his accounts like you suggested, Mrs. Quincy." One of the feds remarked with slow deliberation as Tom arched a brow sardonically—covering up the pain he felt at Justine's outburst.

"And..?" She pleaded as she swiped at her eyes in irritation. "Then arrest him." She finished as one of the feds walked over to her sternly.

"We didn't find anything, Mrs. Quincy." The fed said quietly as he removed a pair of handcuffs from one of his pockets.

"But we did in your accounts." He finished before slipping the cuffs onto her hands with a 'click.' Her eyes widened in shock before narrowing in horror.

"I didn't! I swear I didn't take it! He's the guilty one!" She screamed as I saw Tommy close his eyes in an attempt to regain his patience.

"Let her go." Tom remarked suddenly causing both Kwest and I to glance at him in shock. What the hell was he doing? Yeah, I felt sorry for her too, but this was no time to decide to get a heart. I wanted to yell at him—run over to him and place my hand over his mouth, but Kwest grabbed me by the shoulders as if he realized what I was about to do. One of the feds approached Tom slowly.

"Is there something else, Mr. Quincy?" The man asked as Tom opened his eyes slowly before seeking me out in the crowd. Smiling at me, he took a deep heavy breath before turning back toward Justine.

"Just let her go. I'll pay the amount of money she took from the studio under two conditions." Tom stated matter-of-factly as Justine looked up in surprise and Darius snorted from the edge of the crowd.

"And just what exactly are those conditions?" Darius asked sourly—looking around the room as if he were afraid the ceiling might fall down on him. If only he knew that it was going to be a lot more shocking than that. Tom shrugged before pullinga stack of papers out of his pocket.

"First off…" He declared before producing a pen as well. "I fully intend to allow Justine her freedom if she gives me mine." He stated pointedly before handing the documents to the feds. "I want a divorce, Justine." Tom remarked coldly as the feds handed the papers to her gently, removing the cuffs just long enough she could take the pen in her hand.

"I hate you, Tom Quincy!" She wailed as she signed the papers. Tom didn't even flinch. He just looked sad.

"I wouldn't expect anything less than that from you, Justine. I wish you truly knew how sorry I was about Jonathan." Tom stated quietly before turning towards Darius.

"Now for condition number two." Tom replied with a mischievous glint in his eyes.

"If I'm willing to pull the studio out of the hole it now finds itself in, then I want full rights as a partner of the company." Tom remarked as the crowd mumbled amongst themselves—watching in amused interest as Darius's lips tightened perceptibly.

"Do I have a choice?" Darius asked sullenly as Tom shrugged—looking over at Spied and Kwest winningly.

"No, I don't think you do. As a matter of fact, I think we also have a few promotions due to our staff as well." Tom stated wryly, smiling at me before clapping his hands together soundly.

"Now, if everyone's finished watching the show, we have an awards show to get ready for." Tom commented before glancing once more at a broken Justine.

"I really do wish you the best." He whispered as the feds escorted her out of the room and into a car with the intention to escort her back to her home. I stared at Tommy fondly as he turned toward me then, and he grinned before strolling over to me purposely.

"How do you feel about spending the night with the new boss." He whispered languidly as I chuckled softly.

"It just gives me chills, Mr. Quincy—downright chills." I murmured as he stared down at me silently before a hand suddenly appeared over our shoulders.

"Alright, you two. Save it for later. We've got issues to deal with here—plane tickets, reservations, and etc. The Grammy's wait for no one." Kwest remarked cheerfully as Tommy and I groaned. All work and no play makes for a very frustrated Jude Harrison.


	59. Chapter 59

**Rated M for Mature…

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**

Kwest led me into the studio to record, and I belted out each tune with flamboyant happiness. Today had been an emotional roller coaster ride, and I was still coming off the high. Once finished, I saw Kwest motioning at me from the sound room, and I walked into it curiously.

"Yeah?" I asked as he grinned widely before pointing at the door.

"Go look in Darius's old office. The plane tickets are in, and let me tell you they're beautiful." Kwest replied with a sigh as I squealed with delight. They may have just been small pieces of paper with words written on them, but they represented so much more than that.

"Thank you." I cried before rushing out the door in excitement. I felt weird about going into what was just a few hours ago Darius's office, but I shook off the feeling as my eyes landed like a magnet on the tickets.

The Grammy's. What can I say about that? The two words themselves hold such meaning for a musician that tears are literally brought to the surface of your eyes. It's like watching fireworks—it's beautiful and mesmerizing all at the same time. And that's all I could think about as I stood there staring down at the group of plane tickets marked New York City. Oh they were beautiful!

"You're going to go cross-eyed if you keep staring at them like that." Tommy said teasingly from behind me as I whirled around to discover he was standing only about an inch away. I just smiled at him.

"It would be worth it." I remarked as he unexpectedly ran a hand down the side of my cheek. I shivered at the intent that suddenly entered his eyes.

"Are you cold?" He asked quietly as he stepped toward me again—causing me to bump up against the wall at my back. I just shook my head mutely.

"Just the opposite actually." I replied on a gulp as his hand suddenly worked its way under my shirt—flattening against the small of my back possessively. I think I actually stopped breathing as his lips met with mine, and I moaned as he pressed me even more firmly against the wall—leaving no room between our bodies at all.

"Tommy…" I mumbled suddenly against his lips as he stepped back just far enough for me to see the keys dangling from his fingers. I instantly took the hint. Glancing over his shoulder quickly, I noted with amusement that the door was locked firmly from the inside. Grabbing the keys from his fingers, I threw them into a potted plant nearby as Tommy grabbed me by the shoulders, slanting his lips over mine once more before slamming us both into the wall. I couldn't breathe—just gasping as I reveled in the electric energy that roared between the two of us. We weren't gentle this time—only desperate, and I knew that Tom was releasing all the pent up emotion that his stand-off with Justine had caused earlier. I felt loved knowing that he needed me to be there to catch his fall.

"God Jude! I never get tired of you." He said softly as he lifted my shirt up over my head before discarding it on the floor next to us. I just smiled gently at him as his hands roamed roughly along the ridges of my rib cage before stopping at the clasp of my bra, and I found myself fascinated by the way he unsnapped it before leaning over to nibble at the skin of my lower lip. Oh God! I was on fire! Reaching for the hem of his shirt, I pulled it off just as roughly as we both stumbled backwards towards Tommy's new desk, and I grinned at the way he neatly and swiftly cleaned the surface of all debris before lifting me up and setting me on the edge of the wood none to gently.

I was amazed at our union as flesh met with flesh only because I was shocked at how far we had come—how only about forty-eight hours earlier, I had been terrified of how he would accept me. Crying out, I was pretty sure I heard him whisper my name as I thanked the gods of fate that this office was soundproof—moving as we did against the wood—crying out again as he pulled my legs up around his waist. Oh God! I gripped his shoulders tightly—probably leaving slight nail marks as I fell unseeing into a world of pure sensation. Would it always be like this? He let out a breath above me as we settled limply against the desk satiated—our hearts beating in hurried tempos as his eyes met suddenly with mine, and I knew then that this was it for me. There would never be any other.


	60. Chapter 60

"I've decided I want to do a cover song." Tom said suddenly a good half hour later as we were both getting dressed while still recovering from our encounter. I just looked over at him surprised.

"As in you want me to perform a cover or you?" I asked in confusion as Tommy chuckled lightly.

"Left that one a little open to interpretation, didn't I?" Tom asked on a laugh before glancing over at me seriously.

"I mean me." He stated firmly as I pulled on my shirt with a grin.

"That's great. Do you know what yet?" I asked as he walked over to me slowly, removing the hand I had laying at the top of my jeans so that he could button that top button himself.

"I have an idea." He said with a small, secret smile as I leaned my head to one side suspiciously. Tom just shrugged in the '_Don't even think about asking'_ gesture before kissing each of my eyelids fondly. I just shoved him away in mock anger.

"I'm hurt, Quincy. I thought we could share anything." I remarked with a pout as Tommy laughed before throwing me one of my shoes.

"Oh sweetheart, you'll be the first to hear it, I promise." He stated vaguely as I scrunched up my eyebrows in expectation. Oh, now he had me excited.

"Right now, however, I need to have a talk with Darius before the reception the studio is throwing tonight celebrating our departure tomorrow." Tom remarked as I shrugged at him with a wince.

"If you insist on putting yourself through that torture, then you can count me out." I said with a small laugh as Tommy walked over to the door ceremoniously—glancing back only once more at me as I slid on my other shoe before unlocking the door and walking out. I couldn't do anything but smile as I watched him go.

* * *

**_Tommy, Darius, and Stewart Harrison in Darius's new office an hour later…_**

"I hope you have a good reason for this unusual meeting, Tom. Otherwise, you are seriously cutting into the studio's schedule." Darius stated vehemently as Tommy rolled his eyes up at him in aggravation.

"Oh shut up, D. I own half the schedule now. Do everyone a favor and get over it." Tom remarked before turning toward the two men slowly. Darius just 'hrrruummmphed' as he leaned back in his chair curiously before propping his feet up on the top of his desk. Oh, desks were really really a distraction for Tom at the moment.

"Okay then, enlighten us." Darius remarked dryly as Tommy lifted both his brows before leaning against the wall behind him—almost as if it were a support beam.

"I slept with Jude." Tom stated point blank—seeing no reason for beating around the bush. A pall fell over the room as Darius's feet slammed to the floor while Stuart sat heavily on an upholstered armchair nearby in shock.

"You what?" Darius asked slowly as if the idea had yet to process in his brain.

"She's seventeen." Stuart said suddenly—glancing up at Tom with an expression that wavered between shock and unease. Tom just sighed.

"I know that. Trust me, I've tried using that excuse to try and dissuade myself for over a year now. And somewhere during that time, it just quit being important." Tom replied firmly as Stuart just stared ahead of him unseeingly.

"Why are you telling us this now. I mean, seriously, I have no idea how to even react to that bombshell." Stuart finally said as his gaze met sternly with Tom's. "Why are you doing this?" Stuart finished in a whisper. Tom pushed away from the wall with a determined glint in his eye.

"Because I want to marry her." Tom said quickly—watching as Darius just gapedwhile Stuart's head fell into the palms of his hands as if it were too heavy to hold up anymore. This was insane.

"She's still in school." Stuart replied as if knowing that would make all the difference. Tom shrugged.

"Not for too much longer, and there would be an engagement period first anyway. Until then, I'd just like her to continue staying with me." Tom remarked almost pleadingly as Darius stood up abruptly.

"Do you even realize what they'll say about you? I can see the headlines now "Tom Quincy, former boybander, a cradle robber." Darius roared as Tom threw him a scathing look before placing each of his hands on Darius's desk resolutely.

"Do you see the word 'care' written anywhere on my face? At this point, I can't imagine another day without her in it. If she says yes to that, then I'll put up with any consequences. You got it?" Tom stated evenly as Stuart stood up and moved toward the door.

"I just don't know how I feel about this, Tommy, but if she says yes then I suppose I'll support the decision." Stuart related wearily, and Tommy glanced at him appreciatively—knowing that Stuart was willing to try if it made Jude happy. Tommy just hoped that Jude was ready to take their relationship to the next level.


	61. Chapter 61

**_This chapter is dedicated to the lyrics of John Hiatt

* * *

_**

"I need your help, Kwest." Tom said suddenly as he grabbed his best friend by the arm after exiting Darius's office. Kwest just perused him curiously.

"With what?" He asked as Tommy gave him a look that said _'Just humor me, okay?'_

"It's not something I'm going to regret is it?" Kwest asked as he looked towards Darius's office suspiciously.

"Far from it, I hope." Tommy replied before leading him out of the studio towards his viper. Kwest quirked a brow in amusement.

"Oh, this has to be a special occasion if I rate a ride in the viper." Kwest said with a laugh as Tom threw him a look.

"Oh you have no idea." Tom stated vaguely before starting up the engine and driving away.

* * *

_**Later that night at the reception…**_

The party progressed well, but the only thing I could do was yawn as I lounged in a chair at one of the head tables. Man, Tom had tired me out. Tommy looked over at me with a small smile as I yawned again, and I felt him kick me slightly under the table as I sat up in alert before throwing him a _"hey, it's your fault' _look. He just grinned again before leaning over towards me.

"Wake up, sleeping beauty. You may have already performed your song, but I still have mine to do." He said with a wag of his brows as I looked up at him in stunned silence. Now that had gotten my attention. A waiter suddenly brought over a covered dish and laid it in the center of the table, and I just squinted at it in confusion as Tom shrugged.

"Just do me favor, will ya? When I finish the song, take the cover off of that dish for me, okay." He stated as I just looked up at him in wide-eyed wonder before sitting back in my seat prepared to watch the show. Tom winked at me as he took the stage.

"Okay, now, I know I don't usually perform these days for anyone other than my shower, but I recently felt inspired and thought that this would be a good opportunity to celebrate that." Tommy said before reaching for his guitar.

"On another note, this was not written by me, although Lord knows, I wished it had." Tom remarked before starting to strum his guitar softly, and I almost cried at the tune that flowed forth.

When the road gets dark  
And you can no longer see  
Just let my love throw a spark  
And have a little faith in me  
And when the tears you cry  
Are all you can believe  
Just give these loving arms a try  
And have a little faith in me

Have a little faith in me  
Have a little faith in me

And when your secret heart  
Cannot speak so easily  
Come here darling, from a whisper start  
And have a little faith in me  
And when your back's against the wall  
Just turn around and you, you will see  
I will catch you, I will catch your fall  
Just have a little faith in me

Have a little faith in me  
Have a little faith in me

'Cause I've been loving you, for such a long, long time  
Expecting nothing in return  
Just for you to have a little faith in me  
You see time, time is our friend  
'Cause for us, there is no end  
And all you gotta do, is have a little faith in me  
I will hold you up, I will hold you up  
And your love, gives me strength enough to  
Have a little faith in me  
Hey hey  
All you gotta do for me girl  
Is have a little faith in me

Tommy finished, staring at me expectantly as I swiped at the tears in my eyes before leaning over and pulling the cover off of the dish with a flourish. The whole room could hear the crash as it fell out of my trembling hands with a bang, rolling off and onto the floor ceremoniously as I just sat there staring in bewilderment at the ring displayed before me. It couldn't be! I looked up at Tom who was staring back at me seriously mouthing 'will you' against the harsh lights of the stage. The tears flowed like a fountain, as I looked first at the ring and then back up at him in awe. And then I nodded. There was no way in hell, I was saying no.


	62. Chapter 62

_**Later that night, closer to twilight…**_

"You really know how to shock the hell out of a girl." I remarked teasingly while looking over at Tommy in amusement. He just grinned as he started throwing clothes into the suitcases spread open on his bed—our bed. Wow!

"I certainly try." He replied with a teasing glint in his eye as a sudden noise from down below clued us in to the fact that we were no longer alone.

"You two packed and ready to go yet?" Kwest yelled from downstairs, and I grinned in the direction of the door as Kwest's head suddenly appeared around it.

"Damn, and I was hoping to walk in on some action." Kwest declared humorously as I picked up a pillow and threw it at his head. He caught it before winking at me.

"We need to hit the airport guys." He said softly as I grinned at Tommy in excitement. In just twenty-four hours, we would be sitting at the Grammy Awards. I couldn't help but squeal. Tom and Kwest exchanged amused glances before Tom leaned over and zipped the cases up firmly.

"We're all ready." Tom announced as Kwest grabbed one of cases before leading the way out the door. NYC here we come.

* * *

**_The Grammy's_**

The lights, the sounds, the music, the famous people. Ohhhh I was in hog heaven as I sat there in my chair nervously, twiddling with the beads on my dress as Tommy leaned over to place his palm steadfastly over my shaking hand. My category was coming up, and I had already heard my name circulating like wildfire through the other artists present. I guess Tommy and I had stirred up quite a bit of publicity with our engagement.

"Just breathe, Jude." Tom remarked quietly before looking over at the stage in expectation. I tried. Really I did as Carrie Underwood and Kelly Clarkson, of the American Idol fame, strolled onto the stage in dresses that made mine pale in comparison. Kelly looked at Carrie teasingly as they began the banter written for them on the proctor.

"Now, we get to the point in the music industry where rising artists create waves so large they become extremely hard to ignore." Kelly announced as Carrie smiled over at her winningly.

"And that is when we look to this night to recognize them for their achievements. Tonight, we can boast a long line of brilliant and talented artists, but only one will walk home with the Grammy." Carrie reiterated as Kelly pulled out an envelope. My whole world grew small just then—focusing in on that small, white triangle as if it were a lifeline. Somewhere in the midst of my scattered thoughts, I heard them announce the nominees, but it wasn't until Kelly tore open the top of that envelope that I grabbed Tommy's hand so hard, I could tell my nails were biting into his flesh.

"And the winner is…." Kelly began. Oh please, oh please, oh please!

"Jude Harrison." She finished as I just sat there in shock—staring at the roaring crowd as if I had no idea what was going on. Tom pushed me up gently before kissing me firmly on the lips.

"Go get it girl. It's your night." He said with a smile as I threw my arms around him in delight—reveling in the smell of the aftershave he had used earlier that night. God only knows, I couldn't have done this without him. Moving down the aisle, I reached out suddenly for everyone connected to G majors, hugging them until I thought my hair would fall down from the motion—dad, Sadie, Jamie, Patsy, Portia, Kwest, Darius, Spied, Kyle, Wally, and even Liam. Grabbing SME by the hands, I shoved them ahead of me as we marched toward the stage. There was no way I was accepting this award without them there with me. They made up most of the album themselves. Spied grinned as I almost tripped on the stairs, and I threw him a look as he helped hold the hem of my dress up as we climbed. Oh God! My heart was pounding. After hugging Kelly and Carrie excitingly, I took the Grammy before coming to stand behind the podium nervously.

"I have a lot of people to thank tonight." I began haltingly as I looked out over the crowd—seeking the faces I loved. "The fans for one, the studio for another, but the ones I want to especially point out are my sister Sadie, my father, my mother wherever you are, my best bud Jamie and his girl Patsy, my wardrobe consultant Portia, my all time favorite engineer Kwest, Darius the big man behind G Majors, and SME—my one and only band who is, without a doubt, the group that got me to this point. But most of all, I want to thank Tom Quincy. Without him, I really don't think there would be a Jude Harrison—just a punk rocker with a dream still trying to figure out how to make not only great music—but exceptional music. It's the reason he won the Best Producer award tonight. And…I love him..in so many different ways. So I accept this award, not on my behalf, but on his. I was a lost artist praying for fame. He was a totally irritating producer that made sure I got it." I remarked quietly, and with those final words, I searched for his face in the crowd, and when I found it, I held my hand up to the light so that everyone noticed the ring as the spotlights reflected off of it. It was my way of letting him know that it meant more to me than the grammy.

* * *

**Author's Footnote: Alright guys, this is where you hate me when I say : The End. I know I'm crying just at the thought, and after reading over it, I am seriously considering a sequel. Something about what happens after the two get married. But I'll leave that as fruit for thought. What do you guys think? And, hey, do not worry. I live for posting—especially on days like this where I sit at work having absolutely nothing to do. So I just type and type and type—checking occasionally for reviews as I do. I'm hoping tonight's episode will inspire my next long epic, which I will begin on Monday so please look for it. I may also post the sequel to this simultaneously, but I haven't decided yet. I wanted to end this one with a bang and what better way to do that than her getting engaged and winning a Grammy? Let me know if you guys want more from me—a sequel and a new one maybe? Next week is going to be very very long for me so I'll have plenty of time to write. Let the reviews pour in, letting me know if you'd like to see another story from me. And as for reviews, I have so many people I want to throw a shout out to so here goes. Thank you so much Undiscovered91, Catch1Star, riotgirllina, samitiny, Can't Stand the Heat, Tommy4eva, LuvTommy56, Adrienne, Musical-cylinders, Duddley111, Giliwascool, vilandraofantar, punky199958, aubibi, starfan88, TommyQLover, xNaturalBlondex2, frozenfireheart, eleste, trina-D, Angelus1, Saralyeth, MzTommyQ, Jessie, Shakabuku, BrokenDremsx3, Ambreezy, mirage09, yomama101, Mz. Billie Joe Armstrong. Whew! I hope I didn't forget anyone! You guys are so fantastic. And even for anyone who just put me on their alert list, I love you guys too because I know you're reading. Oh, I still have an hour left of work. Will be looking for your reviews—hoping that you guys want to hear more from me. Smiles to you all!**


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